Can someone please school me on the rehearsal dinner

A rehearsal dinner can be whatever you want it to be. It can be casual, it can be a picnic, it can be a formal dinner, it can be pizza and beer. It is up to you (or the host).

You can give short speeches thanking people, or not. You can give your bridal party gifts at this time too.

I also highly recommend having a rehearsal, even if it is short. Walking through the ceremony and reciting the words can be very helpful for everyone involved.

We already gave our wedding party their gifts. I agree that it's awkward to "present" gifts at rehearsal dinner, but that's just my opinion

Basically you can do whatever you want. I think as long as there is a rehearsal and food (home-cooked, BBQ, pizza, pot luck, anything at all) then you're good. You can personalize it however you want. I would just avoid making it a huge deal since the wedding is the day for that.

BE SCHOOLED! lol... great advice you're getting.. its true you can do it anywhere and any type. It depends on you and the type of people you are. We'll do our rehersal and then come back to my housewith all the out of towners and family and ppl in the wedding and then have BBQ and beer here, i got a built-in fire pit in my backyard, so that will be going. No cake. We're not doing gifts....its gonna be awesome and relaxing and FUN... iPod playing, its all good!

like a pre wedding party... make it as big or small as you want. and heck you dont NEED to cater it... make burgers!

Same here as Sabrina. The days before the wedding are probably going to be pretty hectic, especially with so many OOT guests. We certainly want to do a brief rehearsal, and then have a meal with our WP and OOT guests who will be there. I suggest you think about something that will be fun and relaxing to you. We aren't doing gifts either.

We had a catholic wedding so we did a rehearsal at the church w/just those directly involved in the ceremony (parents, ushers, MoH, BM, readers and the Father)...it took about 30 minutes and issues we hashed out were: a) my husband really wanted his parents to be able to see his face as we said our vows so we reversed the "side" of the church for families b) the Father didn't want any "fanny to the faithful" so we stood on the alter and he on the step down for our vows c) because it was catholic, we sat and since we reversed the side of the churches, I asked to have our MoH and BM sit at the alter with us vs having my MoH sit next to my MIL (long story...she was really ugly to my MOH and I wasn't having it).

We paid for the entire wedding ourselves and had a formal wedding reception, so we just had immediate family and those involved in the ceremony (and their families) to our house for a bbq, open bar, cigars etc - fairly low key but incredibly fun. We ended up w/about 30 people.

...cont...I vaguely remember a cake but we had champagne toasts and our MoH and BM made toasts and gave us their gifts that night. The only thing that I worried about was having people at our house late the night before the wedding and the house being a mess....but the mothers cleaned all the dishes and put the kitchen back in order and I was in bed by around 1am (first order of business on the wedding day was a massage at 10) so it worked out ok!

Well..it all depends on how you like it to be. I'll have an elegant wedding at a hotel so I'm not breaking my head organizing anther mini-wedidng. We will call it Welcome BBQ because we'll do it two days after the wedding and will invite all the OOTers. Since we have a DW in Puerto RIco we'lll rent a beach house with a backyard or a deck and we'll have a BBQ , some puertorican (FB) food and venezuelan(FH) appetizers, beers, mojitos, and a few desserts. Ipod music I guess ant it will be in the evening after we rehearse at the venue.

Forgot: Im giving the BMs gifts the night before the wedding at our room, we'll stay watching movies, champagne etc

I thought the rehearsal dinner was for actually rehearsing the entire ceremony? I think I am going to do this, and have the food after we do the run through. My venue is a hotel and spa that also has a night club, so the rehearsal dinner will be held there, and they are cooking the food. We got a nice group rate.

Gosh, I wish it was July already!

We are having a rehearsal at the church where we are getting married and then we are having everyone in the party meet us at a local restaurant for a dinner afterward. That is when we will visit with our family and friends in the party and give them there gifts and thank them for being apart of the wedding. We aren't doing a cake. I don't know why you would need one.

Schooled I am! Thanks ladies.

@Amy - I like the idea of facing the guests. I'll have to ask about that. So let me get this straight.... you step up on the alter and normally as you are facing the alter, the bride is on the left and the groom on the right, but you guys did the opposite? Or did you just step up as normal but facing the guests?

Sorry double post. How come we just can't delete our comments? Hmmm?

We had a casual pizza and pasta dinner after the rehearsal.. it was great.. there is no hard and fast rules on what do you or even who pays. The grooms parents traditionally host this but even that is not always the case. Here is a good article about rehearsal dinner with lots of tips and ideas: http://www.celebrationideasonline.com/rehearsal-dinner-etiquette.html

Our rehearsal dinner will be super informal... in fact we are having a BBQ at my FSIL's house. There is a park across the street where the kids can play while we keep an eye on them. For the big kids, there is a shuffle board, ping pong table, washers game, and other stuff to keep us occupied. We thought it would be better because people can actually get up, move around and mingle. A restaurant would have felt very formal and people would have only been able to converse with those around them.

Ester, because it was a catholic wedding....when my dad did the "hand off", my husband and I stepped up onto the alter (MoH and BM were already there obviously) and we did the opening hymn and prayer and then we took our seats on the left side of the alter (left side if you are facing it). When we said our vows, I was on the left and my husband was on the right and the Father was off the alter (so a step down). My family was on the right and my husbands was on the left....so I think we just reversed the familiy?

So glad for this thread ok add this also to my list I have not planned any sort of rehearsal dinner and my rehearsal is next thurs!! We would like to just have a cook out of some sort going out is just not in our budget but our house is really not big enough and Id love to not have all that clean up to do w/ the wedding 2 days later. I keep waiting for someone to offer for us to use their house but doesnt look like its happening. Maybe a pizza place like you said that just may work! Thanks ladies!