Bridesmaid "Proposal"

I had a "game night" and about 2 hrs in I had them cover their eyes with bandanas and asked them different questions such as "what was I wearing"? What color shoes I had on? And stuff of that nature... meanwhile my mom was placing their glam_bottles in from of them which had our pictures and uniquely decorated and the bottle was placed inside of a decorated ice bucket that read will you be my Maid of Honor? Bridesmaid or etc

I had a "game night" and maybe two hours in I asked the ladies to cover their eyes with bandanas.... I then asked them questions such as "what am I wearing" what color shoes do I have on" and things of that sort ... meanwhile my mother was placing their unique glam_bottles in front of them inside of a decorated ice bucket which the bottle had our picture and was designed just for them and the bucket posed the questions "will you be my Maid of Honor or Bridesmaid" everyone loved it and was so surprised .... and of course it was different and unique just like me...

I think all the pics in here are great and all but what ever happened to just having a conversation with them over coffee or tea and asking?

I didn't do it. They knew who they were long before we got engaged and I didn't think it was a big deal. I just told them they were my BM's. They said okay and the rest is history. Lol! Same with FH's gm's. His brothers were basically like. Okay we are your gm's. We were going to pick them anyways so it was all easy.

I had no idea this was a thing. I asked all my girls with a cute little frame I made but I seriously didn't know about this whole box thing.

I love the bitch mug!!

I'm confused as to how giving them a box of nice things is unsophisticated @Rachel & I mean no harm in that question!!

ETA - OP It's a difference in opinions & just because some on here don't like it , don't means others don't!!!!! I know my girls(all I know for a fact is gonna say yes anyway ,so it WON'T be any kind of "pressure") is gonna love WHATEVER & HOWEVER I do it .. So if you know your girls is gonna appreciate it then do it!

So I wanted to do boxes but because I took them out to a dinner to celebrate...boxes didn't work logistically to transport to the restaurant. So, I just did simple "gift bags" with a nice bridesmaid proposal card, mini bottles of Prosecco with a cute straw and a kraft paper heart that I wrote on that says "I can't say I do without you!", chocolates, and a ring pop. I covered most of the cost of the dinner but they chipped in...I feel like I didn't really ask them I kind of just told them lol

@Amanda - regarding your observation about double standards for men and women, I totally see where you are coming from, but actually, I am surprised men even do all this at all. My guy doesn't even want to have a bridal party, and even if we do end up going that route, he would never in a million years make it all formal and officially ask with a gift. He finds that way too frivolous and over the top, which seems typical for a lot of guys.

So I'm curious to pose a new question to the group....how did all the men ask their groomsmen (if at all)?

Lol, he just asked...easy peasy

All I did was cute cards. My MOH was a no-brainer and really knew as soon as I got engaged, but I sent her a cute little card that said, "He's marrying me, but he's stuck with us" on the front. On the inside it asked, "Will you be my Maid of Honor?" I'm an English teacher and we've been best friends since 7th grade, so I "corrected" it with red pen to say, "You are my Maid of Honor!" I simply wrote, "It was never a question," signed my name, and sent it in the mail. My two bridesmaids got cards that have their name printed on them and then a big gold foil scratch-off heart that says, "I can't say 'I Do' without you! Will you be my bridesmaid?" when you scratch it off. I wrote personalized notes in each one about what they mean to me and sent those in the mail too. I got both the MOH and BM cards off etsy.

As for the guys... my FH is rather uncomfortable with the idea of a "cute" proposal, said it's not his style at all, and just asked/texted his guys. Except my brother- my FH had said before we ever got engaged that he wanted my brother as a groomsman. My bother doesn't like attention and so when I called him to tell him I got engaged, I mentioned it to him so he could be prepared. He asked if he'd have to give a speech. "Nah, just wear a suit and stand there." "Ok, I can do that." lol

@Amanda G. I agree with what you said & not to call out any of these women on here (ok yes I am fuck it) they seems to always have something negative to say like they are bitter ,angry or just a negative person & I just don't get it myself!! How is it ok for the men but but "over the top" as they put it..

I know I asked early, as @Elizabeth said, MOH was a no brainer (best friend for years, his son is FH's godson, her daughter's my goddaughter, I'm HER MOH) so I just told her FH had asked and she immediately started offering any help I may need so I just said "well... I need *daughter* and *son* as RB/FG and YOU by my side", and for the other 3 BM I'll have, we were having lunch together (we've been friends since high school) and I texted on our WhatsApp group (only us as members) a pic that said "shit just got real" with a ring as the "O" and waited for their reactions, they said I should prepare for the bachelorette party and started planning to go look for their dresses together and asked me if I would be opposed to them wearing similar colors, so I just said "well, actually I was hoping you WOULD want to wear the same color since I was thinking you would want to be my BM"

Asked with decorated cookies! They loved them!

I did it. I got small boxes, filled them with chocolate candies and a ring pop and asked them to be my bridesmaids

I did it. My wedding was originally supposed to be in Oct of last year so when I asked the ladies we were still scheduled for that date. Since it would've been an Autumn theme I got small lanterns that I filled with a packet of apple cider, nail polish in one of the burgundy shades of our wedding colors and a pumpkin spiced candle. They all loved them and any time I go to their houses I get to see them as they've all kept them and used them as decor. Some even found ways to make it work for all seasons.

@akshali, my husband didn't do a broposal box but he did make a little bit of a bigger deal, he took each of them to dinner separately to ask them. He was considering getting them flasks or some other little gift but he couldn't find anything he liked enough to buy.

I did! But on the simpler side. I had cute cards and ordered hair ties matching my purple theme that said "help me tie the knot"

All my girls loved it. I handed out three of them but had to mail the fourth. Don't regret at all!

I didn't do any type of proposal but I did ask them all in person. I wanted it to be personal, plus it was really awesome seeing their reactions.

More stress, more time, more money. The perfect storm of the effect the wedding industry has on people.

Ask them. Give them a nice gift at the end. Don't make them do shitty stuff along the way.

That's how you gift them.

I bought stickers for wine bottles and gave them their favorite bottle, very informally. I knew they would all say yes because we'd already been talking about it, so it didn't put pressure on anyone! I think the boxes are a terrible waste? of money.