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Expert September 2013

bachelor party.... irritated

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mackenzie, on June 2, 2013 at 5:17 PM

so my fh and I both talked about it and BOTH decided it was a bad idea for either of us to have strippers, mainly because there is some past history when it comes to strippers, and quite honestly, I don't like the idea of some womans vajay being in my mans face as much as he doesnt like the idea of...

So my fh and I both talked about it and BOTH decided it was a bad idea for either of us to have strippers, mainly because there is some past history when it comes to strippers, and quite honestly, I don't like the idea of some womans vajay being in my mans face as much as he doesnt like the idea of some guys penis and balls in mine 8-0 so yesterday his brother who is a complete slime ball tells a person in the bridal party "i dont care what they say hes having strippers at his party" now dont get me wrong, i trust my man and i am very secure with our relationship, but i think theres a boundary that shouldnt be crossed and i think its very disrespectful to me. i dont want to start off a marriage that way. Now we are both paranoid and its coming to the point where we are both thinking of just not having a bachelor and bachelorette party i cant stand some men.

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Devoted April 2014
Tina · on June 3, 2013 at 11:07 PM
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I completely sympathize with you on this. Strippers are a definite no-go for either of us, if we have separate bachelor / bachelorette parties (which is yet to be determined).

My first husband and I had seperate parties. I went to a drag show / gay club with my girlfriends and he went off with his guys. They told me they went bar hopping. I'm sure you can impagine the shocked look on my face when one of his best friends cracked a loud joke about the "crazy strippers the other night" at my wedding reception. I was very hurt and felt betrayed- on my wedding night. Not a great start. He swore his friend was exaggerating but just the fact that he lied to me right before our wedding made me ill. Needless to say our marriage didn't work out after 5 years, and it certainly didn't start off on the right foot.
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Devoted April 2014
Tina · on June 3, 2013 at 11:10 PM
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My advice would be to cancel the parites and maybe do one together. I'd hate to see anyone start thier new marriage with that knot in their stomach from worrying that maybe something happened. In 10 years the seperate parties won't matter, but starting your marriage off with no worries about strippers will matter.
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Expert September 2013
mackenzie · on June 4, 2013 at 12:21 AM
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@angie c he attended someone else's birthday at a strip club. He doesn't want strippers or to go to a strip club for his party because he knows I am not ok with it and he and I both want to start off on the right foot. However, fbil does not know the full back story but has an idea. Honestly fbil tried to holler @ me before me and fh hooked up, I almost feel like he's trying up sabotage us on purpose :-( ugh! Talked to fh and he says he'd rather do our parties together... Idk I'm ready to just say f it and stay home with fh and get carry out and wine! Lol
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Super April 2014
Angie · on June 4, 2013 at 12:35 AM
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Then maybe the best solution would be to have a combined party, especially if FH is okay with it to the point where he's expressing interest in it. do something fun for the weekend! i'm looking at doing a booze cruise for the same weekend he would be planning his beer fest...i'm also looking at going to a music festival, which he will probably get jealous of me doing (because he likes stuff like that too) and want to go, lol. as long as you two are happy with what's going down, it shouldn't matter how anyone else reacts. maybe your FH can kindof clue FBIL in a little more without giving too much back story and really let him know it wouldn't be cool if strippers showed up if you guys do end up having separate parties?
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