Attendees

Agree with PP’s. The wedding guest list is about both of you. If these people are important to your FH, they should be invited. I don’t know most of the people ya FH is inviting and I’m fine with that. I’ll get to make new friends along the way!

I would say if they mean enough to him to want to invite then then I think you should

An invited guest must either have a bond with, OR regularly see, at least one member of the couple. Even if they have never met the other, family or friends of 1 are invited. You don't erase your fiancé's life history or friends, cutting off people not met before the wedding.

If you have the room in the venue and budget, and he feels that he is close enough to these people to invite them, then I would invite them. I know guys are different in how they view closeness in a relationship than girls. I know for me, I would never invite someone who I hadn't spoken to lately. But I know that my fiance is inviting someone people to the wedding that he hasn't talked to in a little while, but they were close friends at a certain time in his life and so they are important to him. I would talk it out with him, tell him your concerns, and then be open to his opinion as well.

If he wants to invite them, let him. Be gracious and understand if he though of them, he wants to share his happiness with them.

It's only two people and to be fair it's yours and your FH wedding

If I didn’t invite people because either me or my fiancé don’t know them very well there would be about 7-10 people at our wedding. My own brother wouldn’t be able to go. Was he really close to those friends in college? (2 years isn’t a long time also, I graduated 4 years ago and I’m inviting some friends who I was really close with. It haven’t seen because I moved away). Would inviting them mean you couldn’t invite family you really want to invite? I don’t see any problem with letting him invite his friends as long as it doesn’t put you over your limits that you set. It’s his day too.

View Quoted Comment Let me add some more info to this. The only reason why he wants to invite them is because we recently saw one of them. And since we saw one if them he said why not invite both. Out of the 6 years I have been with FH, I met one guy twice and the other once which we didn't even talk because it was at a festival.
He is not close to either if them, sees them every other year at most. I understand that it is his wedding too but maybe I am not seeing it in another POV. I am looking for a small intimate wedding with close friends and family. Having people at my wedding that I barely know or see doesn't seem reasonable.
And I know with that being said some of you will say I am not being reasonable to him. I agree, I just feel how I feel. It's like inviting a random person you see once or twice at the grocery store & inviting them to your wedding.

View Quoted Comment I will try this when we go through our final list. He only has seen them once or twice every other year. They don't text, talk on the phone. Nothing. He went to a 2 year college with them and they were in his class. They didn't even hangout then either.
We recently saw one of them in a band and from there FH felt that he should invite him. And when he said that, he said why not invite the other. IDK.

View Quoted Comment It’s the same for me and my FH, I’ve talked to his Mom a million times on the phone but yet to meet her or his Dad, Stepmom and Sisters :-) we are trying to visit them before the wedding but probably won’t happen. So I’m so excited to meet them all at the wedding that is going to make it that much more exciting.

Maybe he is excited for certain people to see him marry you and to share the celebration. Although he only sees them once every so often, he must like them enough to want to include them in on the celebration. If it were multiple guests I would push back but maybe compromise and give him the 2 invites and just agree to only invite people who are close to both of you moving forward.

My wedding consists of only 47 guests, two of which my FH only met once. Just because they aren’t friends, doesn’t mean that I can’t have them at my wedding. I invited them and gave them both plus ones because I want them to share the moments with me. I’m sure in larger weddings the bride and groom hasn’t met the other side’s entire family as well.

It is his wedding too and I have come to realize that even if I don’t know some of my fiancés friends really well or haven’t been around them that often that they are still important to him. It’s just something to think about and keep in mind when evaluating your guest list.

Does FH know everyone from your, and know them well? If he does, then I think it's ok to ask him to forgo these 2 guests. If he doesn't, then I think 2 more people aren't that big of a deal.

My husband hadn't seen one of his very close friends from when he grew up for several years before we got married, but if he had wanted to invite this friend I would have been ok with it.

View Quoted Comment Again, I agree that if you’re having an intimate wedding, it’s odd for either of you to invite guests who have not had any participation in your life’s journey or other smaller gatherings.


One of my friends posted this on Facebook oneday and I saved it because it can be very true....
“ DO NOT invite me to house warming parties, wedding showers, baby showers, birthday parties, etc. IF you don't include me on cookouts, coffee breaks, couples retreats, girls nights or other gatherings. It is incredibly offensive to presume someone wants to dish out money on your life milestones without actually including them in your life progressions. 🤷🏽‍♀️”

View Quoted Comment Thank you someone who agrees.
We don't have many friends. We don't get invited to parties, cookouts nothing. They both have not been in any of our adventures. I honestly do not want to pay for two extra guests that I never see.

View Quoted Comment Yep... I get it! An intimate wedding changes who and how you invite guests. We’re only having 60 guests (max 65). I say it often on here, but the rule FH and I have is... no “just because” guests.

I think it wouldnt hurt to invite them. They may not be a part of your life but they are a part if his.

I totally agree! There is saying : “ I don't want nobody to be at my wedding. That won't be there for my marriage.”
Wedding to me is very intimate, if you guys do decide to invite them , do you think you will see them after the wedding ? If not I don’t think there’re no reason to invite them .

View Quoted Comment Nope. I know 150% we won't see them after the wedding.