Apps for cocktail hour??

Also, just because you personally do not "notice" apps (or lack thereof) at a cocktail hour, you absolutely cannot speak for everyone's experience. It's great that you don't care if there aren't apps at a cocktail hour but the majority of your guests won't share your opinion. The PP saying they don't care if there are apps are a very select few... it will be the same with your guests, maybe only a select few won't mind but the rest will.

It's important to keep in mind that many people will be busy getting ready and traveling to your wedding so they may actually skip a meal because they just don't have time to put together or stop for a meal before they leave for your wedding. Also keep in mind that some people have medical conditions where they need to eat, and children tend to get cranky when they are hungry, and it's unsafe for the elderly to go without food for certain amounts of time. That alone should make you serve apps.

Lastly, if nothing else, at least get some cheese/cracker, fruit, and wrap trays from Costco. It's cheaper than going through a caterer but at least your guests will have a snack.

ETA: how long does it take you to eat when you go out to dinner with your FH? My husband and I generally spend about 45 minutes to an hour out at a restaurant with good or decent service. We are talking a lot, eating a full meal, and drinking (with multiple refills)--that also includes the time spent waiting for the food to be prepared and brought to our table. If I'm out at dinner with a group or my parents, it's still not much longer than an hour. And that is a full meal, including an appetizer, dinner, drinks, AND dessert, complete with ample socializing throughout. All fit within an hour-long slot of time. Also: we don't talk with our mouths full or rush through our meal. (Generally, a conversation has one person talking while the other person is not, because interrupting or talking over someone is rude, so in that time when one person is talking is usually when the other has the opportunity to take a bite of food before they respond to the first person, and then during that time the person who just finished speaking gets to take a bite of food. So unless you talk non-stop and don't allow other people a chance to speak, you'll have more than enough time to eat while socializing.) The only time it takes much longer than an hour is if we decide to sit and chat at the table after we have finished the meal and paid. So I'm incredibly confused about how you think an hour is not long enough to partake in a few bites of food, drink a couple of drinks, and socialize.

Delfina...wow, thanks so much. I'm flattered.

One of the caterers that we had a tasting with recommended 1-2 passed apps as people tend to take less of those than they would from a stationary buffet and I don't think it added any extra service charges because those servers would already be there to help with dinner as well.

@Rachel, thank you for stating that so well.

If you are feeding them dinner right after you don't need much. Just something light to munch on. We are having 3 passed hot appetizers. But honestly cheese, crackers, and fruit would probably be enough.

ETA: thank you Rachel for that comment. I'm getting ready for work and didn't see all of her comments but goodness gracious. Rachel put it well.

I love how OP is continuously using the argument that "Clearly I'm not the only one who doesn't miss food at cocktail hour". Yea..congrats, like two or three people agreed with you. The other 30 said it's a terrible idea so let's listen to the few who agreed and ignore the majority. Great plan.

OP, you contradict yourself by saying you never mentioned cutting costs, and then praising "budget friendly" ideas. Clearly, this comes down to finances. If you could afford to host properly, this wouldn't even be a question for you. As others have suggested, it would be a good idea for you to cut your guest list.

Waiting for that dinner menu like...

Why don't you do drink and dinner at the same time? That's what I'm doing. I don't understand cocktail hour anyways.

Now that you've said that Leelee- you're right I rarely snack at cocktail hours for any event - but- I think I'd notice if it wasn't there- people need a little something- we are pretty much going right into dinner after the ceremony- but there will still be food around- we'll actually have it all out for them when they arrive so cocktails will start before the ceremony!!! ;-)

Our wedding is at home.

Yes absolutely. People will get really sick if they get drunk with no food

I don't think you have to provide another mini meal but you should have cheese/crackers and veggies and dip. I'm not really an app person either if I know I'm going to be eating a big meal but other people love them so that's what we're doing.

Honestly, the apps at cocktail hour are one of my favorite parts of weddings. I hate sitting still, so getting to walk around, mingle, have a drink, and eat delicious apps is awesome. Also, I frequently end up liking apps more than my dinner. I definitely would not cut them.

100% I would notice no apps, and I would 100% think it was because the bride and groom were too cheap to pay for them (or didn't want to cut their guest list to what they could afford).

I look forward to cocktail hour more than dinner.

Most weddings in my circle/area, at least in the past few years, don't actually have a cocktail hour; they just go straight into the reception. We're having one, but it's only going to be about 30 minutes (the time my venue said it takes to flip the room; we're doing a first look and taking all the posed pictures before), and we're keeping it pretty light on what we have, but we'll still have food.

I don't understand this post, it starts out by saying you know you will get blunt responses but want to know if people actually want/notice if there are no apps. 97% of the comments said, yes, they would notice if there were no apps, you need them. 3% of the comments said, no, you are fine with most of those comments saying only if you immediately went and served dinner but you are saying you are still going to have cocktail hour so that 3% is even smaller. So you use that 3% to justify not having apps because you aren't the only one who doesn't notice them. This is completely illogical.

You claim you don't have time to eat and talk and drink in an hour but other people should be able to get ready (shower, hair, make up, get dressed, pack anything they need to bring, travel) and eat. You expect people to "shove a banana in [their] mouth and put on blush" but somehow can't socialize and drink and eat at the same time? What do you do during meals with other people? Eat in silence? Not eat at all? You've never gone out for a few drinks with people and ordered apps? How did you manage in elementary school-high school where you only had 30 minutes to eat and socialize?

To say people don't notice apps during cocktail hour is laughable. Everyone I know is always more excited for apps than the meal. Every wedding I've gone to people have mostly commented on what the apps were. Any wedding I go to, I purposefully don't eat much prior so I can enjoy the apps and dinner. Most people I know do the exact same thing so yeah we would all be very hungry and disappointed.

Everything Rachel said is 100% correct, you should read what she wrote and then go back and read it again. She was very polite to you as well, you saying posters need to watch how many times they go to a bar if they are going to be drunk after only having drinks available to them for an hour yet your one support for not having food is because you are going to be drinking the whole time. So which is it? People can't be drinking for the whole hour or they will only have time to drink the whole hour?

Thanks to everyone,but im pretty sure i never ruled out having apps at cocktail hour. This thread was to help me on my decision making to determine that. Will be further looking into apps, and our time frame.

True story I was once at a wedding with not enough passed appetizers after a long ceremony. Everyone was starving and I ordered an amaretto sour, and I was so excited because I got a cherry. So the more I drank the hungrier I was do I ordered more to have cherries. Thankfully I know my limits and I am not a crazy drunk but I'm sure I'm not the only person who would over drink in that situation.