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J
Devoted April 2020

Anyone Else Skipping Garter/bouquet Toss?

J, on January 17, 2019 at 1:54 PM

Posted in Wedding Reception 41

We’re not planning on doing these for a few reasons. A large majority of the guests are not single (I mean there are several that are legally single, but in serious relationships and I don’t think they’d consider themselves single for the sake of this tradition). And also I feel really awkward about...
We’re not planning on doing these for a few reasons. A large majority of the guests are not single (I mean there are several that are legally single, but in serious relationships and I don’t think they’d consider themselves single for the sake of this tradition). And also I feel really awkward about both. Especially the garter toss - for obvious reasons. But also bouquet toss - just uncomfortable to me for some reason.

So I’m curious if any other couples are skipping these traditions? Are you replacing them with anything? Do both you and your fiancé want to skip them or do you have different opinions?
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41 Comments

  • Rachel
    Savvy October 2020
    Rachel ·
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    We are skipping both, we plan on doing that game where you each have one of the others shoe and either the best man or maid of honor asks a list of goofy questions and you both have to raise a shoe showing who you think best fits that question.
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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    That sounds like so much fun! And a good way to get EVERYONE involved and not just specific people - aka only the single people or making grandparents and parents want to walk away because the garter thing is uncomfortable.
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  • MIWM
    VIP June 2019
    MIWM ·
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    Were skipping them as well!

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  • Rachel
    Savvy October 2020
    Rachel ·
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    I thought so too, you can probably look up a video or find it on pinterest. Either use the questions they have already or add some yourself.
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  • Jen
    VIP July 2018
    Jen ·
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    Yes - we did skip both.....

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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    Haha. Glad to see so many people on the same page!
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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    It’s nice to see so many people on the same page so I don’t feel weird skipping! Lol.
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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    I love that! Thank you!
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  • SummerBrideInAutumn
    VIP October 2019
    SummerBrideInAutumn ·
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    Totally skipping. The bouquet toss is one thing, but I think the garter toss is tacky and classless.
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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
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    We have decided to skip both. I don't want to "single" out the few single people that will be there and neither of us feel comfortable doing the traditional garter retrieval/toss.

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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    That’s exactly how I’ve felt about it too. It’s like it’s putting them on display for everyone to be like “oh they’re alone.” Which is obviously not an issue at all - but when you’re in that kind of moment I could see them being really uncomfortable.
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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    Totally agree. It’s just gross. I don’t know the actual tradition that goes along with it - but it’s clearly a very sensual implication and I just don’t feel comfortable with that. I’ve always been a very modest person (in high school, the only time my dad ever had a problem with my outfit was a pair of shorts that weren’t even all that short) so it’s just something I’d feel so uncomfortable with especially in front of family.
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  • Elizabeth
    Dedicated May 2019
    Elizabeth ·
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    I am skipping both but replacing the bouquet toss by calling up the couple that has been married the longest (my aunt and uncle have been together 50+ years) and giving her the bouquet and playing a nice love song. I saw this done on 4 weddings and absolutely loved this idea, what a way to honor love and marriage!
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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    Oh my gosh I absolutely love that!! That’s so beautiful!
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  • Angerra
    VIP August 2019
    Angerra ·
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    Skipping both and not replacing with anything else! I want to dance the night away 💃
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  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    Totally agree!
    We skipped both.
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  • J
    Devoted April 2020
    J ·
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    Hey this is completely unrelated, but I read your username and it made me think - have you ever heard of the website Offbeat Bride? My friend is using it to help her with wedding planning. She’s very non traditional (she wants to wear a green dress) and that website has a lot of unique wedding ideas. Just thought I’d pass that information along in case you were looking for some ideas! 😊
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  • Alyrae
    Super February 2020
    Alyrae ·
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    Skipping it it's just a weird things that I am not comfortable doing
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  • J
    Master October 2019
    Jolie ·
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    It depends on how it's done but if they make you uncomfortable don't do it. All the weddings I have been to have done the toss for anyone unmarried, including couples. I am doing the bouquet toss because it will be fun to nag the person who catches the bouquet that she'll get married next! Not sure yet on the garter toss though if we will do that. We might skip that part but haven't talked to FH yet. I know he'll just be obnoxious about taking it off and I don't like that attention lol. If we end up doing it the toss will be just a toss we aren't making the man who catches it put it on the girl who catches the bouquet cuz that's just unnecessary.

    Edit we aren't gonna let children do the bouquet toss simply because in our friend group there are a lot of unmarried couples and we do think it's telling cuz I caught the bouquet at my friends and we were next to get engaged (another couple was already engaged and got married last year but still) we ended up next in line.

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  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    YES. That's a great site. Thank you, we had our wedding already:

    Pirates of Caribbean destination wedding & reception

    Swanky 50's/60's local reception

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