Addressing Guest Attire for Wedding?

Are people not able to edit their posts anymore?

I still seem to have that function.

View Quoted Comment Http://emilypost.com/advice/attire-guide-dress-codes-from-casual-to-white-tie/

View Quoted Comment Wearing blue tuxedos too. Very formal.

View Quoted Comment Hi, read the thread. Dress codes don’t really exist. They are open to interpretation. The only dress codes that are true are for Black and White Tie affairs.

View Quoted Comment Are you going to try and make fetch a thing next?

Whoa, there! I’m pointing out facts. Just because someone is willing to back you up doesn’t mean I’m being rude. I’m following the CGs, you didn’t.

Welcome to the internet!

View Quoted Comment What? I’m not saying you’re being rude because you are correcting someone who is agreeing with me. You literally said, “are you going to try and make fetch happened next” or something along those lines. Why are these comments even necessary is all I pointed out.

I’m sorry that you are offended by my farting unicorn??? Seriously? Also, please read the quote boxes, it will help contextualise things. No use having this fabulous update if it goes to waste.

View Quoted Comment I like turtles.

View Quoted Comment ...chocolates or amphibious creatures?

We put “Formal” on our wedding website but nothing on our invitations. (I don’t think. If we did it was formal optional). My fiancée is a female, but will be wearing a gray suit and her party is all in gray suits as well.

Whenever someone suggests something that doesn't feel right, wrinkle your nose, shake your head from side to side, and say, "No, we're not going to do that." Any Jed Clampitts will add to your day, not detract from the beauty and joy of it.

Hey OP, I feel your pain and have a similar dilemma. My FH will be wearing a navy tux and our wedding is formal. I’ve read the black tie requirements, and TBH our wedding meets like 99% of them (even though some are really silly. Like yes we’re offering a valet, but more importantly we’re hiring a shuttle to transport all guests). It’s in the evening with a live band, 4-course meal, hot passed apps, champagne toast, Viennese desser hour, etc BUT I don’t want to tell people black tie. I want to tell people it’s formal, which it is, despite my groom wearing *gasp* navy. I don’t want to put black tie optional, because, like you, I think it’s silly. My plan was to put “formal attire requested” on the invites (most weddings I go to are black tie so I guess I’m used to seeing attire on invites I guess). I’m doing this so some of my guests, particularly on one side of the family, don’t wear jeans and khakis. Some may say “oh well they’re the ones who will look silly for not knowing how to dress for a wedding”, but I just feel like if we can avoid them looking/feeling silly by literally giving them a heads up it’ll be formal, than I’d rather do that.

I’ve just accepted this is one of those things I disagree with the forum consensus on, and see it as a victimless etiquette crime

View Quoted Comment If the men aren’t in tuxes, it’s not true Black Tie. Ugh. And yes, telling adults how to dress is gauche.

View Quoted Comment

Your men are in navy *tuxedos* so you're fine. My men are in navy 3 piece suits - so key word tux. Which makes sense and seems pretty obvious now that I've posted all of this.

View Quoted Comment Black Tie = Black Tux with black bow tie...

Lordy!! Please if you’re going to conflate your terms, do it properly.

Lol what have I come back to?!? I think navy suits & tuxes are hip and fun and modern. That said, neither qualify for black tie, and a 3 piece suit =/= tux.

Although not something I would do, I don't think it is the end of the world to put something on your wedding website (re: formal attire) as long as you get that this will mean different things to different people.