A Red Dress? Really?

I can see why you feel is inappropriate. It used to be a "rule" not to wear red or black to a wedding. Its not really a rule anymore, hough I probably wouldn't wear red. I would just let it go. Pick your battles I guess.

Yes here is the pic she sent me, i won't say anything to her about it, but this is what alarmed me.

I have read several places that wearing red to a wedding in a no no right up there with wearing white. Red draws to the eye big time and will stand out. I understand where you are coming from on this but, I still wouldn't advise telling her she can't wear it. My step sister wore a red dress to my wedding and yes it stood out, you can immediately spot her in every photo even if shes in the background. I knew she was going to wear this dress before the wedding and I didn't say anything except how nice it looked on her.

ETA: Just saw the picture you posted, that seems inappropriate for a wedding no matter what color it is.

I am not trying to be rude, and I would NEVER tell any of my guests they can't wear something, I am just a little taken aback that she wants to wear something so low cut and so bright. And I was told by a few older family members that my mom should not be wearing bright red. I will not say anything though. Just wanted honest opinions!

As you can see, my mom wore fire engine red to my wedding. The dress had a train too lol. Did I throw a hissy fit? No. She felt pretty in the dress and that was ok.

ETA: missed the picture. Not sure how I'd feel abut that...

You can always ask your photographer to Photoshop the color of her dress and maybe cover up the girls.

Wait really? You can't tell your mom what to wear. My colors were plum and orange and my mom wore navy. MIL wore black. I had zero issues. My photos turned out fab. What's the problem?

ETA: Ok, the neckline would be an issue for me. Your wedding isn't a nightclub. Unfortunately, there isn't really a nice way to tell her that so I would leave the issue alone and hope she changes her mind?

Hey guess what! My mom will where whatever the fuck she wants!

I see a slight problem with that..the color doesn't seem to be that big of a deal but that is way inappropriate for a wedding IMHO

I agree Kris' mom looks gorgeous! I mean she isn't heavy or anything! I just picture a 20 year old wearing that dress out to go clubbing, and my wedding is a black tie/formal event. I wont say anything... I guess I am overreacting...but it is like she wants to be the center of attention with a dress like that...she said she got it for a steal too...so I guess when I get married and I post my BAM everyone can decide for themselves if they like it!

So, I'm not one to say that men should have any say over the women in their lives. This is more of a person-to-person situation - I think the bigger concern would be your father being OK with that.

If the dress bothers you, offer to go shopping with her to find something. Red really wouldn't bother me, but I can see where that neckline might be a problem if you're having a more formal wedding. Ultimately this is a small issue, and it won't matter in the long run.

Where..wear....almost got it!

The MOB doesn't have to match

I am going to ask her if we could bond and go dress shopping. I will be okay with whatever color she chooses but maybe I can get her to cover up a little more, she is 59 so I am not sure why she wants to all of the sudden where such a plunging neckline

I am pretty firmly in the "it doesn't matter what she wears" camp, at least in theory.

In practice, I am still kind of hung up on my ex-MIL showing up uninvited when my ex and I eloped, wearing a 1980s neon pink pantsuit with matching neon pink lipstick. It was mostly that she showed up uninvited, but the loud center-of-attention outfit just added insult to injury.

So I would talk to her. I would sit her down and say, "Hey, stepmom. I know you're not a fan of wearing the colors I gave you, but everyone else will be wearing those muted colors, so maybe you can look for burgundy or something so we all look a little more harmonious in the photos. It would mean a lot to me. Thanks for understanding."

Whoa. That dress is crazy inappropriate for a wedding. Wow. That takes 'low cut' to a whole new level. I wouldn't be ok with that either.

I had no idea it was poor etiquette to wear red to a wedding. I wore a red dress to a wedding last year. I don't think I stole the spotlight from the bride in any way. Glad that's not a 'rule' anymore.

I don't see any point in making this a thing. Let her wear what she wants. Red goes really nice with your colour scheme...

She's not in the bridal party, you don't get to dictate what she wears.

The color would not bother me....that cut though on an almost 60 year old woman, damn. I hope she's still got perky ladies...otherwise all I can picture is real sad saggy boobs. If she's comfortable in it and your dad is comfortable with her flaunting, then I'd say oh well. However if it gets here, she tries it on, and hates it....go shopping with her.