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Ms. 2 Mrs.
Super October 2012

Is Marriage Overrated????

Ms. 2 Mrs., on October 1, 2011 at 2:23 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 18

I was having a conversation with my girlfriend about marriage when she threw out there that to her marriage is overrated. She remarried her husband and this second time has been worse than the marriage she had the first go round with him. But I was in shock that a married woman would say that to someone that's planning a wedding. But I do understand that in frustrating moments people often question why they are together in the first place. Although, I know there will not always be happy moments. I know exactly why I am marrying my FH!!! Have you ladies ran across someone who feels the same way or is trying to get you to not take that next step???

18 Comments

Latest activity by Koderman, on April 11, 2019 at 4:26 PM
  • Shropshire2Davis
    VIP June 2019
    Shropshire2Davis ·
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    My cousin says marriage is over rated as well, I think it's because he came from a broken family and what not, and he pretty much just thinks that marriage never lasts anyhow, and if it does the two people who are married just end up miserable in the end anyhow...

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  • Jouselle
    Super October 2011
    Jouselle ·
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    Nope, nothing but support and love! But that's just the kind of families we have and friends we keep on both sides. And they all know that we take good care of each other and will continue to for years to come. Smiley smile I'm sorry that things have been rocky for your friend.

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  • Anna
    Super December 2011
    Anna ·
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    I use to be soooooo bitter about marriage with good reason behind it. However I think when you get to a point where you find someone that you can love even through ALL the hard stuff it dont become overrated. I do think some people see a couple thats NOT married not as serious as a married couple or even engaged, I think thats total BS because the act of marriage is not for everyone and I dont feel it makes a relationship less serious or important.

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  • Sabrina
    Master November 2014
    Sabrina ·
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    I think it just depends on the person and the circumstance...if she REALLY thought that, ALL ALONG... she wouldn't have gotten married or REmarried in the first place. SO she must just being going thru something....i wonder! Marriage is HARD.... sometimes harder than you expect it to be... bottom line is you're marrying for life and that anything that comes up needs to be dealt with. Marriage is special and important. In the 9 years i've been married, 11 yrs with him, we've come across MANY MANY things that were sometimes too much to handle... its HARD and it takes work.. But if you're willing to do..its SOOO worth it! =) dont listen to NAY SAYERS, lol

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  • Shana
    Master October 2011
    Shana ·
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    Wedding's are overrated. Marriage isn't. Anyone who thinks it is, is married to the wrong person. For last past 19 months, I've just wanted to be married. I'm so done with wedding planning and I'm annoyed by how much we've spent when all I really want is to be married to my FH.

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  • Krista
    VIP May 2012
    Krista ·
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    I think more of the issues come from being together for so long, not marriage. I believe most people just blame the problems on marriage because that is usually what comes along after a few years of being together. Take someone that has been with someone for long time but not married. They are probably going to have a lot of the same relationship problems as the married couple. So no i dont think marriage is overrated. Its a fun tradition that makes people feel happy. Its the couple and the elongated amount of time they have been together that causes the problems.

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  • 2d Bride
    Champion October 2009
    2d Bride ·
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    I think marriage is overrated in the sense that so many women seem to feel like finding a man to marry is the most important goal in life, or like they aren't really grown up until they are married. There are worse things than being alone, and being with the wrong person is one of them. Being married to the right person can be wonderful, but settling for the wrong one just to be married is a recipe for disaster.

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  • Tink
    Super July 2012
    Tink ·
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    I agree with Shana The Wedding is overrated but Marriage is not. They only thing a wedding, getting married should change about your relationship is your last name.

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  • That one chick who's married to that one dude
    Master April 2012
    That one chick who's married to that one dude ·
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    Most people who strongly believe that marriage is overrated are also the same people who has either relationship problems themselves or have been around a lot of problem relationships. Also at the same note, there are some who have never been married and think is overrated because the reality is that they wish to believe that because they fear it. There is usually a deeper meaning to it for people who feel that way.

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  • Maria
    Expert August 2011
    Maria ·
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    That really depends on WHO is saying that. Just like most would say " There's no such thing as love" You have to look at the source. I think the processes of finding "Mr. Right" There's not such thing- it's finding who's right for YOU! Not this "ideal Mr. Perfect" ...

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  • P
    VIP August 2014
    Princess Bride ·
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    I have had a couple of people tell me the same. The marriage is just a piece a paper. What's the point of being married and what's wrong just living together. I just tell them I don't see it like that. A marriage is uniting 2 people as one. Becoming a foundation. A family. There's nothing wrong with that.

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  • Ali
    Expert October 2011
    Ali ·
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    I agree with 2d bride, I think that if you were raised to see nothing but marriage as your end goal, or if you're trying to fix your relationship with marriage then yes. I do however think that weddings are overrated lol

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  • Tia & Don
    Expert April 2012
    Tia & Don ·
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    Hmmm I am going to say yes marriage is overrated... reason being I don't feel marriage is necessary to dedicate your lives to one another or to vow to be faithful etc. I do not believe that love isnt true unless you share a name or a contract. I believe in marriage myself clearly, but, I don't think those who choose not to be married love each other any less. My grandparents who raised me from birth have never been married. My grandmothers first husband died tragically and she vowed that she would never marry again. Years later she met my grandfather who respected her wishes but loved her just the same. Even tho my grandparents do not share their last names or haven't exchanged rings, signed a contract etc.. I have never seen a love as true as theirs. They are in their 70's, spend every moment together and still miss each other when they are gone for more than a few hours. Marriage does not = true love & True love does not = marriage. What ever equation works best for you.

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  • Amber
    Expert April 2012
    Amber ·
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    I had a down time in my life when I told myself and others around me that I WILL NEVER GET MARRIED... I was okay with this and could never picture marriage in my future...

    Than I met my fiance. I told my mom a week after I met him that he would be the one. 2 1/2 years later we are planning our wedding and I know he will be that old wrinkly man next to me in 50 years.

    I thought about just not marrying him and just living our lives together, but we both want that extr hump of sharing a last name, signing that contract and making it offical.

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  • Rebecca
    VIP December 2011
    Rebecca ·
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    Marriage in itself is not overrated, it's a gift. That being said, I know unmarried couples that have been together a long time and they seem just as happy as the married couples I know. To me, there is no right or wrong way to commit to the one you love.

    I really feel in my heart I want to go before God, FH, Family and friends and declare my love for this man along with my vows. I just feel deep down that's what I am meant to do.

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  • M
    Expert August 2012
    MrsPtoBe ·
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    I never thought I'd get married. I always told everyone I wouldn't; not because I didn't believe in it, I just never thought I could possibly find I guy I'd want to spend the rest of my life with. Here I am being the first of friends and my family's generation to do so! I do but don't understand why some people think marriage is overrated. Largely because I think what some people I encounter who hold this view are really saying is, "a wedding is overrated." Which, sure, I know I can put $20,000 toward something else like a real house or new car but I wanted to have a big party to celebrate this step! To each his own on the matter. I also understand why some people are just like, "what's the diff between us married and us just living happily doing the same thing married couples do?" Again, to each his own. I'm a traditionalist. I want to go before an officiant, God, friends and family, and most important the FH to say, "yep...this is it. you're the one. God put you here for me."

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  • Tina
    Expert June 2012
    Tina ·
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    I dont really think it is overrated.. But I do think it is a piece of paper to make your family a whole legally.. I think you should be one and completely faithful and united with the other before you get married... Marriage itself just ties it all together legally. When your in a relationship you should try to give it your best, as if legally married if you truly love the person. I dont think being married is any harder than not or really any different at all.. I live with my FH now have been for a year so we know who we are so getting married Im not gonna change how I act cause Im married.. Ill still be honest and true to him.. I guess that's where all the Bachelor crap comes in cause some think your one till you get married but if you committed to one person than your not a bachelor/ette.. I dont believe in that crap and think is wrong to act like whorish fool before your wedding..

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  • Tina
    Expert June 2012
    Tina ·
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    Think of a wedding cake... Your bottom layer is when you first met.. Your next tier is when you fall in love.. Then next tier is when you get engaged and commit.. Then you just legally get married which is your cake topper.. It finalizes everything..

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