College and getting married
Lately I've been thinking that I should wait until I'm done with school to get married BUT FS is 20 years older than me. I'm 23 (be 24 Monday). He has 3 kids (18, 13, 10). We've discussed the possibility of more kids and he's open to that but not going to press the issue due to my battle with the endometriosis and PCOS. That's just not a battle I think I want to fight. My thing is, I overheard my mom talking to someone and she made the comment about how "she should finish school before getting married".......I know I should, but given the age gap and health issues, do you guys think I'd be making a mistake by getting married before I was done with school?

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Posted On: Oct 14, 2010 at 6:10 PM • Vendors are allowed • Add to My WatchlistFlag As Inappropriate1 like

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Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 6
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:12 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Honestly, I don't see the connection. How the heck is getting married PREVENTING you from going to school? Having a child might, yes, but getting married? No way. You can do whatever you set your mind to.

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:14 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
It's not preventing me. She just has some issue with it. I guess she has this idea that it can't be done.....

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:14 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
or shall I say, SHOULDN'T be done...

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 6
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:16 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
So what?! It's not her life! You do what's right for YOU not her.

Married: 03/26/2011
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:18 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Happy early birthday! No, I am still in college and getting married and have 2 little ones. To me waiting or not I want to get married. So I say the heck with what other people say and do what is right in your heart. You love him and cherish your FH then don't wait, set your date and plan along. You can do both. Heck, I'm doing all three and I am 28 Going on 29 (Oct 23) : )

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:18 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Thanks! For some reason, I always bite my tongue with her when it comes to anything, but with my dad I'll just flat out tell him how I feel about things.....I guess I need to start doing that with her as well.....she can either be there or not, the choice will be hers.

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:20 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Thanks, I truly do love him. Can't imagine my life without him. He encourages me to achieve those goals I have set for myself and he's a huge support.

A & M Photo and Video Productions, Inc.

A & M Photos and Video Productions, Inc.
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:23 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Dear Crystal: I have friend that he got married and both of them waited until they completed college to have children. I don't see nothing wrong with it.

Teapot Bride
Wedding: 10/04/2014
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:27 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Getting married before college isn't a big deal, but planning a wedding before finishing college is a huge task. When I was in college I was so busy I couldn't even imagine trying to plan a wedding during that time. If you can handle it without going totally bonkers, then go for it!


But time and stress-wise it might be easier to wait until after you've graduated before throwing yourself into wedding planning. What year are you in college?

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:30 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I still have a ways to go, but as far as the planning of the wedding goes, I know EXACTLY what I want. I met with this wedding coordinator who's ridiculously crazy, but I love her. She has the attitude I need!!! LOL

Private User
Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 3
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:31 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I'm still in school and getting married. For me, hosnestly, marriage wont change much, which is why we arent waiting until i've graduated. Weither we are married or not, eh will still go to work 8-5, i'll still have class, we will still spend time together. the only difference is that we will be living together, the rest will be as if we are dating.

Meghan
Married: 08/20/2011
Reviews: 3
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:31 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
There are financial advantages to waiting, but that's about it. There is nothing wrong with getting married before you finish school. But I'd wait to have a child until after school for sure.

Since he is much older, I'm going to assume he's financially stable. He can support your while you are in school. That's not a reason to marry him- but it's an added benefit to a current plan. I think your mother would see that...

Just be smart and don't plan a wedding for the middle of a semester or anything like that...

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:35 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Thanks for your input ladies. Meghan, I 100% agree about waiting to have a child until after school. That is NOT even going to be an option until I'm done. Yes, he is financially stable and also, I am definitely not going to plan it for the middle of a semester.

Married: 10/09/2011
Reviews: 5
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:41 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I'm in graduate school now and recently had to write a paper right up until we left for our pre-anniversary getaway. I decided then that I would be taking the semester off, because I don't want to be writing a paper up until the last minute before my wedding.

So, that's the only thing I suggest you think about. Waiting to get married until after you finish school means you don't have to worry about classwork leading up to the big day.

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:44 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Shana- yea I already said I wasn't going to do summer school at that particular time, because the date would be right around the time summer school would just be starting.

Private User
Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 5
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:50 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
The only reason that I waited to get married until after I finished school is because well I was hoping FS would want to tie the knot after I got my Bachelor's but we weren't financially stable yet, so I decided to go to grad school and grad school has been very demanding, I don't have a (social) life anymore. And we decided to wait until I finished school to have the wedding so I wouldn't be writing a paper (just like Shana said) right before the wedding. And it was pushed back about 6 more months bc FS wanted to be all done with treatments and wanted to make sure his eyebrows grew back in. I know that sounds weird but we didn't want to look at our wedding albums and say "remember you were sick then?" so, that's our story, But you can TOTALLY get married and stay in school. My mom actually planned her wedding so that she can get married during her Summer break. She got married August 6, so she had May-July to finish up planning, then got married went on the honeymoon and back 2 school

Crystal
Married: 06/09/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 6:54 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
That's my plan, to do it during summer break. That way I can be ready for that upcoming fall semester.

Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 5
Oct 14, 2010 at 9:29 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Well crystal, I am in school and will be Graduating seven days after my wedding talking about a full week...lol Keep going with your plans and stay focused and don't let people stress you out. Remember there are women who came before us that have been doing this since the beginning of time.

Married: 06/23/2012
Oct 14, 2010 at 9:31 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
You can do it!!! I'm in a grad program and many of the ladies I take class with are married and some are married with kids...if you want to finish school you will, married or not.

Married: 06/25/2011
Reviews: 6
Oct 14, 2010 at 9:35 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
When I was 10 or 11 my mom decided out of the blue that she wanted to go back to school... and not just for a Masters, nope, she went in for a Law Degree. So if my mom could do it with me hitting pre-teens and my brother around seven or so... plus being married, you can keep going to college after you're hitched too. Don't even sweat it. :)
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