Would you invite a friend you're not speaking with to your wedding?

I know it’s a little different for me but my sister wasn’t speaking to me for a while after I got enegaged. She’d talk to my FH but not me because she was mad at me for not making her a bridesmaid even though I asked her and she turned it down- but I won’t get into that bc that’s not the point. The point is, I love my sister. I planned to invite her to alll the things and even to set her a spot at my families table even if she never spoke to me between now and the wedding. I think if you value that friendship, invite her. If she doesn’t want to go she will rsvp no but at least you’ll have been the bigger person to invite her in the first place.

I wouldn't! Some of my college friends are hard to see often due to distance but we stay in touch, and they will be invited. But the friends who haven't made an effort in a while were cut in like phase 2 of guest list trimming.

No. As a general rule, I don’t invite people that I’d struggle to have a natural conversation with.

I had a falling out with my bff of almost 10 years about a year ago and hadn’t spoken to her since then, but I reached out to her about a month ago and I’m SO glad I did. Honestly. We’re back to talking daily like nothing ever happened and she’s a bridesmaid.

No, I wouldn't. I did invite a friend that kept blowing me off, wasn't a great friend to me in hopes of making the friendship better. That was a mistake. My wedding day she spent looking glum, wouldn't talk to me, wouldn't talk others; photos of her are unsmiling. I tried reaching out to her and asking about her life and have gotten nothing in return.

My at the time best friend went from maid of honor to not even invited over the span of 3 months. It's a tough situation but I knew taking her out of the wedding party would kill the friendship. At the time (and now still) I don't want or need her as a friend so it wasn't a difficult decision to make. Losing a best friend was way more devastating than losing a maid of honor but I've been so much happier and completely stress free the last few months and it's been nice.

If you are keeping your guest list very small than I would suggest not inviting her seeing as she isn’t someone you seem to be very close with. If she isn’t invited just be aware that it may be a friendship ending move, you shouldn’t have to feel guilt but just be aware. If you do not want to end this friendship then I would extend her an invite, who knows this could bring you guys closer.

I would at least invite her. It's not like you're the one ignoring her then sending an invite.

I wouldn’t invite her. There are plenty of friends I’m not inviting. I only want people I’m super close to there. If I haven’t talked to you in a year, that’s not close enough to me.

I debated for a long time about one of my best friends from high school. We’re still friendly, and I went to her wedding, but we have no real relationship of which to speak. It occurred to me that if she went to my wedding, she’d know hardly anyone, and I’d DEFINITELY be concerned with making sure she was having a good time and I don’t want to be preoccupied with that. I feel a little bad bc we haven’t fallen out of anything, we’ve just moved away and drifted apart. Her including me in her wedding is compelling. But then I remember I had a super awkward time at her wedding so ...speaks to our “closeness”

I had a similar situation but I felt she would understand my decision knowing you limited and the distance you have with her, don't feel obligated it's your wedding. Best wishes

I have another “friend” that I have not spoken to in the past year except relating to her wedding (not even details, just info gathering like address and name spelling) and I painstakingly have opted not to invite her bc she obviously doesn’t have that much invested in the friendship. I feel a little awkward and then I remember that she has been absent for a very dramatic/traumatic year for me and I find myself not caring anymore. I think she’ll probably be upset that she wasn’t invited, but then I realize all the things that she didn’t invite me to this year sooooo ....screw her

Honestly? No. I'm not even inviting my mom's side of the family because of how distant and uncaring they are (my mom seconds this). From the sounds of it, this person is actively ignoring your messages. That doesn't sound very friendly to me. But, in the end, it is up to you.

Simply no I would not invite someone I have not talked to in 2 years.

Welp. I just have to share this story. I asked a girlfriend of mine for four years, to be one of my bridesmaids. She accepted. But, then proceeded to make things difficult for the other bridesmaids (I heard this from one of them whom I trust and know for years more), basically because she didn't want to contribute much financially because she just bought a house. Fast forward to a month later. She freaked out on me. Like completely freaked out on me because she didn't like something that I posted on a discussion thread (I don't even remember which site) on some random bridal web page. She thought the post was about her (it wasn't, and I didn't mention any names anyway), and in a long ranting email she told me that she no longer wanted to be a bridesmaid. I reached out and tried to work it out but never heard back from her. I became scared that she was stalking me on the Internet, and things like that. Anyway...

She has since attended and been a bridesmaid for another girl in our friend group (who also started acting strangely).The other girl didn't invite me to her wedding, so I took her name off the guest list.

Last week, after seven months of silence, I took my ex-girlfriend off the list and replaced her with a great person that I've known for more than 20 years, from college.

So, in sum, choose your guests/bridesmaids/etc. wisely. Cut drama or non-existent communicators where possible. Wedding planning is already stressful enough.

Nope, hard pass. She clearly can’t be bothered to communicate with you.
Dont pay for her!

I wouldn't, and I think you can still salvage the friendship if you want to, as long as you are not inviting other friends from the same circle. If ALL your mutual friends were invited EXCEPT her, that would make a pretty clear point. But if it's not likely she would know anyone else going, you can just use the "keeping it small" line

I didn't know a whole lot about wedding planning when we crafted our list, and sent out STDs, so I did include some old friends from my school years who I used to be close with. Now that I think about it, it was kind of premature, why would I expect someone I haven't spoken to in years (aside from social media) to come to my wedding? At this point I can't not send an invite, but I will understand if their RSVP is a no.

I know it’s tough to make that call, I had a similar scenario. I lost touch with a really good friend- I was in her wedding and everything! I don’t really speak with her or spend any personal time with her, and when I do I just don’t have a good time in her company. For me, I chose not to invite her because I don’t consider her a close friend and I’m comfortable with that decision. Will this person you’re considering inviting enhance your wedding experience and bring you joy? If not, consider not inviting her.

View Quoted Comment I agree with this! If she ends up not understanding the situation, then it sounds like she might not be a very good friend to begin with.

We invited strictly close friends and family, not everyone was happy about it but only one person (someone we grew up with but haven't actually hung out with for many years) actually said something to us and I explained that we were having a small wedding for budget reasons and we had family that we didn't even invite and we were sorry if they are upset by it but it was just the way we had to do it. She actually seemed to take it well, but really who knows? I don't because we our relationship is the same we don't hang out and we comment on things randomly from time to time.