We're here to help you keep moving forward, no matter what your plans are.

M
Beginner September 2020

Would you do it?!?

Max, on August 18, 2020 at 12:26 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 18
Saved Save
Reply
I hate hypotheticals but here I am with one anyway. It's your wedding day and you wanted to be cautious and could spend hundreds/thousands of dollars on FDA approved saliva tests for your guests. Do you do it to make sure everyone is safe? Do you hope that everyone has been taking care of themselves because what if someone really special to you tested positive, would you tell them they couldn't be there anymore? Something I would consider for my wedding but I would be so nervous at the same time.

18 Comments

Latest activity by Tiger Bride, on August 19, 2020 at 9:08 AM
  • Melle
    Rockstar June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag

    So hypothetically though would you be sending those saliva tests ahead of time to guests or having them there on the day of the wedding?

    • Reply
  • M
    Beginner September 2020
    Max ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Probably day before since it said they could get results in as little as 3 hours. Question was not so much about the process but moreso about the pros/cons of having people tested and what to do if by chance there was a positive.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Rockstar June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Yea i was just wondering because i guess i would want to know the logistics of it as part of deciding whether or not to do it.

    if they're positive then obviously they can't come unfortunately.

    to be honest i feel like if there was an easy test they could do ahead of time and it wasn't inconvenient or expensive to administer then i don't see the problem as an added measure of safety but there's an incubation period too so it might not be valid. i think the real issue is how do you even know they're going to do it?

    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Rockstar November 2021
    Chrysta ·
    • Flag
    So, if the question is about the pros/cons and what to do if there was a positive...
    Obviously the pro is that you would know for sure whether anyone was infected or not. Having that knowledge would likely make guests feel more at ease, and more able to celebrate without being concerned about contracting the virus from any of the other guests. The only con I could think of would be the cost associated with it. If someone was to test positive then yes, they should be asked not to attend! I feel like anyone that tested positive would voluntarily exclude themselves from attendance though. I couldn’t imagine anyone being so horrible as to go to somebody’s wedding knowing they are infected and could potentially infect and kill others!
    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Expert October 2020
    Kimberly Online ·
    • Flag
    I would say sending out tests is not a good idea because false negatives are a real concern. Even people who have contracted COVID can have negative test results if the test is taken too early. So if they could come thinking they are OK but end up unknowingly spreading it to others. For those still in favor of the test, are you going to send this test to each vendor too and require them to take it before the wedding? As in each catering staff employee, makeup artist, officiant, DJ, etc? Because you will be around those people too. Not worth the money for a huge risk and major pain in the butt to organize/coordinate. Just my two cents.
    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Rockstar October 2019
    Meghan ·
    • Flag

    Outside of cost, the biggest con I can think of is a guest might have been exposed, and contracted the virus, 3 days before you test is given. If this is the case, it won't show up on the test and they will attend your wedding and risk infecting everyone anyway (outside of their own knowledge).

    • Reply
  • M
    Super January 2019
    Maggie Online ·
    • Flag

    No, I wouldn't do it. The amount of potential issues and ethical quandaries of mixing healthcare with personal relationships is just too great. You can't force people to take a test. Nor can you guarantee all your guests would use their best judgement and just stay home if they did test positive. Would you be receiving official test results or just rely on the honor system for reporting? And could you turn away Aunt Nancy and Uncle Fred if they showed up at your ceremony after testing positive? Would you hire security or would you deliver the bad news yourself?

    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Rockstar November 2021
    Chrysta ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Kimberly makes a very good point about vendors. I hadn’t even thought of that. If you aren’t going to test each vendor, you won’t really have an accurate idea of safety/infection at the event.
    • Reply
  • MOB So Cal
    January 2019
    MOB So Cal ·
    • Flag

    In theory, I understand why this would be appealing, but in practice I think it creates a lot of practical and ethical issues, and still will not "guarantee" that you and your guests can rest assured no one at your wedding is infected with Covid. Some of the issues include: how and where would the tests be administered? (mailed to guests and then they mail it back to the lab? That will take a lot of time and coordination); will they have to come to a common location for testing? (may not be practical given where they live/work schedules/etc.); would you REQUIRE guests to participate (e.g., "You will not be allowed to attend, if you do not submit to testing." YIKES...); how will results be handled? (would they go directly back to the guest, leaving you to rely on an honor system of guests accurately reporting results to you or would you receive the results...and then need to convey them to the guests...so many issues with ethics/privacy/HIPAA-type concerns...); the tests might miss positive guests who are still in the early stages of the incubation period; in addition, there might be false positives and false negatives, samples might not have been adequate and/or were contaminated, etc. Daughter is responsible for her company's Covid testing program. They are using saliva tests and have changed labs 2-3 times in the last couple of months related to issues I've listed and others. Even in a work situation, they can offer tests, but not require them (although, they can prohibit employees from reporting to work if the company knows an employee has tested positive or reasonably believe they have been exposed to someone who has tested positive). Tough decisions! Good luck!

    • Reply
  • Margaret
    Rockstar October 2020
    Margaret ·
    • Flag

    No, I would not do it. I would hope those invited to our wedding are being adult / responsible enough to stay healthy. We've made it very clear that we are not going to be offended to anyone not able to attend due to covid.

    I firmly believe if you require your guests to do this test they would be offended as you not trusting them. (Maybe not, but I know I would be).

    We have had people close to us test positive along with some losses.

    • Reply
  • M
    Beginner September 2020
    Max ·
    • Flag
    Also for the record we would still be using our original protocols of masks, distancing, and all that. I guess it could be asked then why do the tests and maybe just so people feel a little more comfortable? I know it's a difficult subject and I guess a pointless "what if" but I guess I was curious other FB/FH thoughts
    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    Super March 2020
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag
    Hmmm great idea in theory but what about HIPAA? I don't belive that you would legally be able to see the results unless guests signed a special form. So in "thoery" a guest could still be positive, show no signs, and still show up. Irresponsible yes, but I've worked in a spa where guests tried to come in after being exposed to COVID. I wouldn't expect people to make the right decision.
    • Reply
  • Jeni
    Devoted July 2021
    Jeni ·
    • Flag
    No, because it can take several days for someone to show symptoms and have a positive result, so you would be giving everyone a false sense of security. People may then slack off on social distancing and mask use because they think everyone else is negative when that may not be true. HIPAA doesn't apply here. In very simple terms, that's only between medical professionals and their patients and in certain health care settings; there's no law that prohibits people from asking if you have covid or prohibits people from disclosing that they have it or not. At the same time, I wouldn't want to be in the position of handling all that info. I would stick with enforcing social distancing guidelines, requiring masks, and requesting that anyone who doesn't feel well stay home.
    • Reply
  • Kell
    Super April 2021
    Kell ·
    • Flag
    No, ma'am. I wouldn't do it. At that point, I just wouldn't have a wedding.
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Totally this.
    • Reply
  • Jodie
    Expert August 2020
    Jodie ·
    • Flag
    Among the many good reasons mentioned above, if it was the day before, you run the risk of the results not being in on time. Additionally, that would require the person to quarantine between testing and yout weeding in order to make sure they don't get infected after testing... too many variables and personality I'd just not attend if I had to jump through hoops like that just to go to a wedding...
    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Super March 2021
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    It would give your guests a false sense of security. My FH tested positive on Thursday and began showing some symptoms same day. Myself and our three kids were tested on Sunday all with negative results. I began showing symptoms on that same Sunday and by Tuesday had full symptoms (bad cough, fever, headache). Yet two days earlier I had tested negative.
    I think stressing the importance of staying home if they are showing any symptoms and providing guests with the masks, hand sanitizer and social distancing at your wedding is a much better option than a false sense of security.
    • Reply
  • T
    Expert April 2021
    Tiger Bride ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I don't mean this in a harsh way, but this is a peculiar line of thought to me.

    You want your guests to be "comfortable" so you are subjecting them to covering their faces, staying away from other guests, possibly other restrictions like no dancing/temperature checks at the door, and now you want to make them get tested/self-test before being admitted to your wedding. Does that sound like a relaxed, "comfortable" atmosphere? It doesn't to me.

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles