would it be rude to tell the dj to avoid taking song requests?

Any time there is a dj.. guests are likely to request stuff.. However yes you can ask the dj to not take requests. I have asked mine to not play certain styles of music if requested and have a song do not playlist though they do not fall within the styles that FH and I decided we didn't want at our wedding

My DJ has a "do not play" list that I make up for him so that if people request these songs he won't play them, but you can also just tell the DJ you don't want to take requests and they should be open to that. My parents refused requests at their wedding (this was the only part of the wedding my dad had a handle in... He literally listed every single song he wanted played for the entirety of the wedding) and people still talk about how great their wedding was 26 years later.

The problem is that I don't know a lot of new songs that are out, so I can't add them to a do not playlist. There are also number of people amongst my family who fancy themselves DJ's and I don't want anyone bothering the DJ.

@judi.. just tell the dj.. No requests.. they shouldn't have an issue with that

My sister asked her dj not to take requests and they had a do not play list. He unfortunately ignored both requests and ended up playing music that guests requested and they hated.

We had a few songs that we absolutely wanted played, and a few that we absolutely didn't. Aside from that, we agreed to let the DJ read the room and come up with the mix that would get people up and dancing. That said, he specifically asked if we wanted him to take requests or not, so I don't think it's all that uncommon. If you don't want him to take requests, tell him that and make sure you're on the same page. Then, if anyone requests a song, he or she can deflect them appropriately.

Just gonna comment on this part: "there is a lot of music that I don't like and would really not want to dance to", If your guests do not like your music choices they will not dance to it either. I went to a wedding in November and the music was a bit lame. The wedding was at a restaurant on the ocean. Out on the ocean a boat was playing more modern music. Many guests flocked outside to listen and dance to that music. Several comments were made about how people did not like the music choices and the dance floor was empty the whole night except for the bride and her MOH.

So yes, you can tell the DJ to not take requests, but your guests might not enjoy your music choices and will not have as good of a time if they could request a song or two.

The reception is about your guests and while I can understand that you want a couple of specific songs played, you should also cater to your guests that are there. It wouldn't be fair to play music that only you and your FH like. Let your guests have some music they enjoy too.

ETA: So no, I don't think you should tell your DJ not to take requests. If you're that worried about it, you can tell your DJ to stay away for certain songs. But don't make your guests suffer because you're not into their music.

Our DJ has a list they provide clients with songs they want to have played and ones that they don't. They let us know that if a song is requested that made the do not play list they will tactfully let that guest know they cannot play it. Other than having the songs for the father/daughter and mother/son dance we're giving our DJ free reign to keep the guests dancing.

They'd probably love you for that. Guests don't get to "request songs" like a radio station. That would be like guests asking me to break away and do their family portraits. Um, no. A good DJ knows what to play and you get a number of must play or do not play.

I don't plan on making anyone suffer... I just don't enjoy certain club or dance mixes and don't want them played. also my fh family is into line dancing which excludes 75% of guests.

I never said I wasn't allowing the dj to read the room or play what gets people up and moving.. I just don't wanna hear club or heavy techno (at 3pm on a sunday)

i just want the hired professional to do his job

Judi, then just give Give him a list of certain songs/dance music you don't want played. I've never been to a wedding where a DJ played any techno or club music. He will know better than to play such music at a wedding.

I hope so @mrs.armstrong!!

For my cousin's wedding a few years ago, she asked us (me and her 2 sisters) to help her make a list of "must" and "don't even think about it" for her DJ, since we have similar tastes and close age, and her older sister was in charge of it (she had veto power if any guest requested a song to the DJ), o course they told him to put something else as long as it wasn't on the "don't even think about it" list... and that's exactly what I plan to do

Our DJ specifically told us that he doesn't take requests...Which I was very happy about

My FMIL sent me a text saying that we need to make a sign that says "No request for the DJ" I rolled my eyes and replied, I don't think we need that. Of course we will have a list that we want the DJ to play and some songs that we'd rather him not. But not going to ban our guest from requesting things they want to hear. Your DJ should know what to play and what not to play. Unless your DJ doesn't take request as part of their policy.

He left it up to me - i really just dont want anyone bothering him and, aside from my must play, suggested, and do not play list, want to give him (or her, IDK who is assigned to me yet) free reign to do theri thing)

My DJ asked for a must play list, a do NOT play list and a it would be nice to play list. He basically followed it, but did throw in some songs that he felt worked with my guests. He did get requests that were on the do not play list (sorry but I can't stand the damn chicken dance or the hokey pokey!) and he simply told them they were on the do not play list. My guests were cool with it since it wasn't a lot of songs and he still played a bunch of good ones. I don't think it's rude at all if you don't cut out everything your guests might like. You do want them to enjoy themselves obviously.

Nothing rude about having a do not play list, or saying no requests. It is not inconsistent with caring about guests, some guests may request stuff others do not like. Your call.

It isn't rude to tell the DJ no requests. A good DJ can handle a guest with tact if they make requests. We had to tell the DJ and MC not to allow anyone the mike aside from the best man and us as a couple. Mainly because we have a few people ask if they can do speeches and we absolutely don't want them doing that especially after an open bar. Our DJ said that's a normal request he gets and gave us a preview of how he would handle it if guests approached him about it. Ditto to songs requests.