NewestHess
Super May 2015

Who the F*** do you think you are?!

NewestHess, on January 3, 2015 at 1:12 PM Posted in Planning 0 24
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I've made it clear from day 1 of planning that our wedding would be adult only and that I would be happy to help from babysitters, it's been fine with everyone. This morning I get a text from my childless aunt saying "You don't think they have seen their parents have a drink? So you have basically mandated that one parent stays home with the kids. You're funny. You don't want true adults at your wedding, just young adults with no real responsibility. Why don't you just say that?"

Seriously?! Most of my friends HAVE kids! I just want a night to kick back and enjoy the evening with my friends and family where no one has to worry about their little ones getting into something or leaving early because it's the kiddos bed time. GRRR!

24 Comments

  • GoneAndMarried
    Master August 2015
    GoneAndMarried ·
    • Flag

    She sent that text out of the blue clear sky?? How bizarre.

    That's super rude and none of her business. As a parent, I would look forward to a night out without my child and was always happy to arrange a babysitter. She might understand that better if she had children.

    • Reply
  • Annie & Javi
    Master October 2015
    Annie & Javi ·
    • Flag

    Ignore her, I've been to more weddings where children weren't allowed then those that they were.

    • Reply
  • IrishLove™
    Master October 2013
    IrishLove™ ·
    • Flag

    We had people calling us the week before our wedding about children. It's going to happen just ignore them! Weddings to me isn't a place children need to be at! The only exception to this is if you have children in the wedding even then our FG left shortly after we cut the cake.

    But it's strange your childless aunt would be the one to bring this up!

    • Reply
  • Kia
    Dedicated May 2015
    Kia ·
    • Flag

    WoW. I'm having a childless wedding and 95% of my guests have children. My guests are so happy that they get a night to enjoy themselves and be around adults without their kids. Of course our kids and nieces and nephews will be there but that's it. She definitely needs to mind her business.

    • Reply
  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
    • Flag

    What did you say back? She's a little bit agitated for someone with no kids. I smell an agitator with children in her midst.

    Now for the advice part: join the IDGAF Club. You're not inviting children. Thanks for understanding. Hope you can come. Byeee!

    ps. I had kids at my wedding and loved every minute of it but for those of you who say "no kids" -- no means no. Stick to it. Politely stick to it.

    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    January 2020
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    I think you write her back and tell her you recently joined the IDGAF club. Then you can tell her what it is, BWAAAAAA HAAAA HAAA.

    Almost all of the weddings I've done recently have been childless (except for the couples' kids, those in the BP and a rare baby....

    It's your wedding stick to your guns and maybe uninvited her! She doesn't sound like any fun at all.

    • Reply
  • AlexisM082
    Master February 2016
    AlexisM082 ·
    • Flag

    I'm sorry, but I'd rather spend the $165 a head on people that will appreciate it rather than some screaming 4 year old. We have no children. We don't plan on having any either, but I know our friends who do have kids are looking forward to a night without them.

    • Reply
  • Tania Lynn
    Super July 2015
    Tania Lynn ·
    • Flag

    She doesn't even make sense, saying she just wants to kick back with friends and not have to worry about kids getting into things or leaving early for bedtime... Uhhhhhh... That is the entire point of having a no kids wedding. Wtf?!

    • Reply
  • Lauren R.
    VIP August 2015
    Lauren R. ·
    • Flag

    We're at the point in our lives where a bunch of our friends have kids and they are looking forward to a kid free evening. lol I would ignore her for sure.

    • Reply
  • songbird
    VIP March 2014
    songbird ·
    • Flag

    Oh yeah. Been there. Just ignore her.

    We had "no kids under 10" for our wedding because, frankly, adding the small kids would have put us waaaay over headcount (it was the difference between ~100 and ~150 people).

    Strangely, the only people that really gave us "feedback" were the older generation (MIL and one elderly aunt) and one cousin who did not come (from out of state) because they had NEVER left their kids (9, 6, and 4) with a sitter... ever. But all the other people who actually HAD small kids were happy to hire sitters.

    DH had to have a firm talk with MIL after she sent an email directly to me saying we "had to" invite kids (after we had discussed our decision, including the reasoning, at least 3 times.) We simply ignored the comment from the elderly aunt. And, for the cousin who stayed home... "We will miss you but we understand your decision."

    • Reply
  • NewestHess
    Super May 2015
    NewestHess ·
    • Flag

    I've been ignoring her messages because I know if I respond, I'm pissed enough to say something I'll later regret. This is not the first time she has brought it up. I have explained to her several times before that A) We want an adult event where everyone can kick back and relax, B) We want a small wedding and adding all the kids would be an additional 50 people and C) There's going to be drinking and neither FH or I believe that children should be around for that.

    Call me stubborn, but I'm holding my ground.

    • Reply
  • Snarky
    Master September 2014
    Snarky ·
    • Flag

    I would write back, "its unfortunate that you have interpreted it that way. Happy new year" and let that be the end of it. Dont give her the satisfaction of knowing she got under your skin.

    • Reply
  • DNA
    VIP October 2015
    DNA ·
    • Flag

    Omg I would be comping at the bit to give a nasty response but you are doing the ADULT thing and ignoring. Ask her if she wants to cover the cost of hiring a babysitting service.

    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    January 2020
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    Kids are people; even if they DON"T cost the same, they still take up space (as much or more as an adult, lol)

    • Reply
  • JustMarried'14
    Master September 2014
    JustMarried'14 ·
    • Flag

    I'd text her back

    "I love that you are so concerned about everyone else's children to the point that you are giving up your invitation to babysit so everyone can come as a couple! If that isn't the case, back off and let the adults handle their lives, just as if it were a date night for them. Thanks!"

    Sorry, I'm no help, just a bitch. She is nuts for trying to interfere. You are doing the right thing by ignoring her. Can you block her number until the wedding? LOL

    • Reply
  • Kemmie
    VIP May 2015
    Kemmie ·
    • Flag

    I'd be a bitch and say: You're right I want real adults at my wedding not the kind that send my childless aunt who has no stakes in the matter to approach me instead of talking to me themselves. Tell these so-called "real adults" they can make it a twosome at home instead and you can join them in protest if you see fit.

    But yeah that'll only beget more drama.

    • Reply
  • NewestHess
    Super May 2015
    NewestHess ·
    • Flag

    HAHAHA I'm loving all your responses, they are actually making me feel better.

    • Reply
  • OG FMP
    Master August 2015
    OG FMP ·
    • Flag

    Ignore her, unless she's paying for 100% of your wedding ;-) lol

    ETA: I have 2 kids and I love me some adult night especially an adults only wedding!!! Kids are loud and you can't have fun and watch the rugrats at the same time and then they get tired and cranky once 9pm hits! No thank you!!

    • Reply
  • Marina
    Super August 2014
    Marina ·
    • Flag

    Just politely tell your aunt that your guests are mature enough to arrange for someone to be with their kids the night of the wedding. You can also tell her that if anyone has issues with your adult-only wedding, they are welcome to contact you directly :-)

    Translation: "True" adults hire babysitters, they don't bitch about things that are none of their business to begin with.

    • Reply
  • Mrs Ronco
    VIP June 2015
    Mrs Ronco ·
    • Flag

    I wonder who peed in her cheerios.

    I personally would either pay no mind to it, Or tell her to mind her own business; unless she wants to do the babysitting. It would depend on my mood/stress level.

    The youngest person on our guest list is 16/17, and they are tech an adult.

    • Reply

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