When did you have your engagement dinner announcement? How far after proposal?

Yes it is okay to pass on an engagement dinner - they're not necessary.

We didn't want an e-party - pointless to me with all the other pre-wedding festivities that may happen. Not to mention it locks you into a guest list because everyone who you invite to the e-party must get an invite to the wedding. I don't care if it's family, relationships can change.

Like an engagement party? This is one of those things you don't throw for yourself - just like you won't throw a bridal shower for yourself. If someone wants to throw one for you, have fun! But this is not your responsibility to plan, nor should it be.

Also- we didn't want an engagement party but my mom/MOH co-hosted a small surprise dinner with about 10 of our absolute nearest and dearest friends and family about 3 months after our engagement.

We never had one... Honestly I didn't know it was a thing but since we already lived together and everything it wasn't really necessary because everyone knew it was going to happen sooner or later. If you want just have a nice casual celebration. I mean when we announced our final wedding plans we had grandparents and aunts come over for a grill out so everyone could meet and we could tell them when and where we were having the wedding.

@GymRat I agree with that, I don't want to seem like, greedy. @Kennedy, I think my mom may be cooking up something, my brother asked if I knew anything about wedding stuff and I was like uhh no. Also I agree with the STBB shouldn't throw it but I'm I'm excited. @AnSauder, my mom was super excited and still is because its been almost five years and my family was like about time!! lol

My Mom is throwing me an engagement party. We got engaged June 10th and the party is September 17th. My Mom wanted to do it sooner but it involved a lot of planning and I just didn't want to feel super rushed (I did most of the planning myself. It is at her house and she is paying for it) You are not supposed to throw your own party but if you invite a bunch of people out for dinner and drinks and announce the engagement I think that sounds fun.

We are having one this weekend. We got engaged in May. It's not a big party but a small BBQ. Our wedding party and parents are the only invited. We will "propose" to our wedding party during the BBQ. Mostly siblings and close friends who we already know will happily accept. We're excited!

Usually, the bride's parents get the first opportunity to host an engagement party. Then after that, the groom's parents or friends of the couple are welcome to host one. I think this is something that is becoming less common. My cousin and my MOH hosted outs and it was so perfect. But, as @Gymrat said, relationships can change. A friend who came to our engagement party is no longer welcome at our reception. I know it's rude, but it is a risk of such an early party!

What kind of falling out are people having that it warrants uninviting people to a wedding? Are these newer friends? I have been friends with everyone coming to my wedding for 15 years plus. It would have to be really really bad. I never thought twice about my party list.

I didn't have one. I think it's a waste.

We did a dinner for our families to meet. No big party. I guess it depends on how big your family is.

Yes that is fine, we did not have one

You don't host your own engagement party. Personally, I think you are pushing it on the timeline - engagement parties, if you have one, should be done soon after the actual engagement. Its fine to get your family together to celebrate, but it doesn't need to be called an engagement party.

We did one but it was my immediate family (dad and sister) and their SOs and FHs parents. My dad insisted, plus he never met FHs parents before. But no eparty or anything like that.

I was wondering about this too. I learned on here that couples don't throw their own engagement party. However it seems like everyone is expecting us to have one and asking when it is. I feel like responding with, "oh we want one, but nobody is hosting one for us" comes off as needy, greedy and rude.

I actually had already planned on a Heroes and Villians themed Halloween Party that would double as our engagement party... And sad that I've had to toss it to the side.

We threw our own "engagement party"! We threw a big crawfish boil for family and friends and we also proposed to our wedding party! Down south we don't pass up an opportunity for crawfish and family. )

I don't think e-party's are necessary. If you skip it, no one will notice!

Typically within 3 months (or I'd say within 6 if it's a long engagement). You just want lots of time between that and your wedding (and any showers that may come prior). Rule of thumb is, no e-parties within 6 months of the big day. So IF you're having one, it's best not to let a lot of time pass after the proposal. The original idea behind these parties was to announce the engagement. With social media - most people WILL know you're engaged fairly soon after.

We passed.

We didn't have an engagement party. We did invite my mom & his mom & step-dad out to dinner to tell them that we had chosen a date. But, it was more like a family dinner than anything else.

Erin Woods:

1) You never heard the saying, "weddings and funerals bring the worst out of people"?

2) And do you EVER, EVER, EVER not take an opportunity to fucking brag?!

Like, EVER?

Are you BuffetKaren's sister?!

Yeah, as other people said, I think it's up to the bride's parents to throw it first, and if they pass someone else can. I don't think it's something you throw.

My mother threw us an engagement BBQ. It was super casual, we made it VERY clear that gifts weren't expected (still got some, but really tried to steer clear of that), but it was super nice seeing all my relatives at once since I moved to CA 2 years ago. No plans to have one on FH's side (his fam is in CA/MT/NM, mine is in MA) and definitely no plans to throw one ourselves.