What makes being a bridesmaid expensive?

I've spent upwards of $1,500 to be a bridesmaid. Most of this expense was expected but some was not (Mother of the Bride sprung the Bridal Shower bill on us after stating she would pay for the whole thing). I did NOT want my bridesmaids to incur such an expense, so this is what they are paying for my wedding:

Bridesmaid's dress: ~$100 from Azazie
Dress alterations: varies
Bridal Brunch (at my mom's house, no gifts): Less than $20 each for games and decor
Bachelorette (1 hour drive, one night in hotel, dinner out): ~$150 but this is a guess
Hair/Make up (I'm paying for half, and this was optional so not everyone is getting it done): $100
Shoes: what they own
Jewelry: I am providing the jewelry
Accommodations: venue is local so no one needs a hotel room

Total: $400-$500. Still more than a guest but not as pricy as it can get.

Edited to add: no one will have to take any time off to attend my wedding or pre-wedding events. I wanted to add that as a PP mentioned time is money, and I completely agree.

I would also like to add time. Wedding party members give up more time than a standard guest and that in itself can be "expensive". I am not strictly speaking PTO from work, but from other obligations that they may want/need to do instead of wedding related things. How busy their work schedule is, family dynamics, etc. It's usually beyond standard friends enjoying each others company and hanging out.

It depends on travel too. when i was a bridesmaid the bride lived in a different state than most of us bridesmaids and the wedding was there too and the bachelorette/bridal shower was also there. so every single time we had to travel to her. travel expenses for airfare, ubers/transportation, lodging, etc add up on TOP of the expenses for the shower and wedding, etc.

and i like what Janet said about time - we had to come on a THURSDAY for the wedding rehearsal but the wedding was on a saturday. so that means we had to take 2 extra days off of work.

I guess it depends on how costs are split up between the bride and bridesmaids. Like if the bridesmaid is paying for her dress, hair and makeup, that is already going to cost more than an average guest. Attending the bachelorette party, especially if she has to fly across the country for it. Accommodation for those who aren't local. Taking time off work for the bachelorette, rehearsal or a dress fitting can equal lost $$$. The costs add up for more than a common guest.

For my wedding, I'm paying for the dress, shoes, hair, makeup, spray tans and jewelry. So my bridesmaids aren't incurring that much of a financial cost. But they are still paying for the bachelorette party, the bridal shower, and some of them are paying for accommodation and travel.

Every time I've been a bridesmaid I've had to pay for my dress. I paid $450 for one once. I've had to pay for hair and makeup. If I was just a guest, I'd wear a dress I already had, and done my own hair and makeup. Bachelorette party, a gift can add up. Time off work, if you aren't getting paid leave.

Being a bridesmaid is expensive.

My bridesmaids paid for nothing. It's ridiculous that the people closest to you have to pay for the honor of standing up in your wedding. How F'd up is that?

I bought their dresses, paid for their hair/makeup, paid for the lodging. One BM OFFERED to throw a shower and I accepted her offer but would have never asked her to do it had she not brought it up.

As a BM in other weddings i've had to pay for: gifts for multiple showers, hotels for multiple nights depending on the rehearsal date/time, dress, alterations, hair/makeup, shoes, jewelry, bachelorette parties and bridal showers. I love my friends but holy crap does it add up.

I think it really depends on your friends and respecting their budgets

I am frugal and have ran everything by my bridesmaids to make sure they are comfortable (as well as groomsman).

Also, my fiancé and I discussed that we do not want anyone to say no to being in our wedding party because of budget and we would eat any extra cost (we are trying to keep our budget low so we were willing to pay what we would ask others.

That being said, I have bridesmaid who have great incomes, and I have others who are single stay at home moms.

I have made it clear I do not want gifts from them, their presence on my big day is more important, they did get me some silly gifts for my bach party. If they have asked multiple times about a wedding gift we have told them we enjoy cheap wine

Dress $100, alterations varied

Shoes: whatever they choose! most used what they had

Hair and Makeup: optional, they all chose to do it, $155 and I am paying tip/travel fees

Bachelorette: about $50 each

No bridal shower

I am paying for accommodations for night before wedding.

My friend who is coming from out of town, I paid for her dress and will pay for her hair and make up (gas is expensive!!), she is staying at my house to save money.

Groomsman: $165 pants, white shirt/brown shoes: they already had, belt or suspenders of their choice. We paid for bowties cause we ordered at one time.

I think it really comes down to what is priority. For me, it is about having my girls by my side and not causing any of them stress.