What do you think of having a Spritual Wedding instead of a Legally Binding Wedding?

Apparently, you are convinced you already have the solution: putting God first. Because there is just no chance that a bride could enter a marriage convinced that they were both putting God first, and only discover later that the groom had never put God first, or had ceased to put God first.

I suppose this is convenient, though. It means that if someone gets divorced, you can assume that they weren't really putting God first, even if they said they were and acted like they were. And thus you will discover a 0% divorce rate among those who put God first.

@2d Bride...You've said it!! But remember the Devil is busy!!

It is fully 100% possible to have a legally recognized marriage where both partners put God first. For the reasons people have already stated, I believe it's a lot more difficult to have a "spiritual marriage" where both partners cross all of their legal T's to take care of each other in the eyes of our society.

I fail to see how taking out the "legally recognized" part would make any marriage stronger, or more focused on God. That's what I'm asking you to clarify. I'm not sure I understand your point of view.

@Kris S, and your right! I am trying to see if some couples do that instead of the legal stuff, would there relationship or union would have been stronger, you know? Like Kim Kardashian or now I hear Will and Jada, etc.,Because it was only based on Love, and putting God 1st, and it's apparent that it's only about that. And only wanting to please God, and him only.

1) from one person with faith to another, God IS love. A Marriage based on love would be a GOOD one.

2) YES, if Kim and her husband or any other celebrity married for LOVE and not money, fame, lust like a lot of them do, then sure, they would have better chances of having a lasting relationship.

3)Just because a couple starts a marriage "putting God first", doesn't mean they are immune to weakness of the stresses of marriage that sometimes destroy it.

4)Not legalizing it has absolutely nothing to do with the success or failure of a union.

@Jen P...So right...We know that, but do they? LOL

@Jen P...So right...We know that, but do they? If you let it destroy it!! Love never fails!!

And FWIW--my parents are atheists and will be married 50 years this February. So it's not always God that keeps them together. In my parents case, it’s love, respect, patience (lots of that!), etc. For religious people, I thinks it's necessary but as others have pointed out, it doesn’t guarantee a happy marriage.

50 years Wow, that's a Blessing!! Congratulations!!! But like you said, it's Love!!! True Love!!! So one or thee other!

I agree with 2ndbride that would be great for same sex couples but the problem there is most religions dont agree ( I thought ) with same sex marriages or they used to not. I havent been to church in forever so I really dont know

Lol I like how she agreed with you 2d, don't think she understood ya. =D

And just because you're on the deed to a house and then you split up, doesn't mean that you guys will just split ways easily. And courts won't try to figure out whose whose if in fact you're still not legally married. Thank you Judge Judy and the Peoples Court. =D

You can always do a commitment ceremony but it gives you no legal rights to property you acquire together, no right to information about your partner if, God forbid, something happens to him or her and a serious disadvantage monetarily in many transactions like qualifying for a mortgage or getting health insurance.

With so many couples fighting for the right to get married legally, it's kind of beyond me why two people who wanted to be "married" and could, wouldn't. If you don't want to get married don't. That keeps it all real simple.

And as a side note, if you want to have a ceremony that looks like a wedding but doesn't have a license involved, good luck finding any clergy person, no matter how liberal, to be a part of it without everyone at that ceremony being really clear that it is not a legal marriage. We can be held accountable for participating in a fraud.

I say, Go all the way...spiritual and legal

Do you think your relationship is going to be stronger if you ditch the bridesmaids and the gift registries that you have planned for your vow renewal? Those things are just as socially constructed and have less to do with God than any legal marriage vow.

I do not for one split second believe that you actually believe any part of the "theory" you are defending in this thread. You want a socially recognized marriage just as much (if not twice as much more) as the rest of us.

I'm with those who said have both. You can be legally married and not do it for the right reasons, but that still doesn't mean that everyone legally married is not in love(spiritually connected) or automatically going to divorce. I also don't get why you equate not putting God first with marriages failing. I know a lot of people who have different faiths or who don't belong to a church or religion whose marriages are great. I also know some deeply religious people who did put God first and have a failed marriage. Sheida, most of your posts have just been confusing.

sometimes there are legal reseanson s for not being legally married. if you have a power of aturuny it is ok and a will

^^ Agreed with Pan X.

You also realize that your "point" really has nothing to do with your original post...

Coming from someone who's marriage will only be legal until we leave the state of Iowa, it's essentially what we are doing. We want to show to ourselves and others that we are committed to one another for the rest of our lives.

But as someone who doesn't get the pleasure of having her marriage legally recognized by country or state she lives in and WANTS it to be legally recognized. It is a shame the some people don't take advantage of the privilege they are given when I can't and want to.

Its not hard to find a pastor to do a commntment cerimony.

Although, I do think that you should be able to marry the person you want without the law approving it, there are too many risks by not going by the law. If you marry and have the certificate, the benefits out weigh the risks. In this day and age, married couples have a lot of benefits including medical decisions, insurance, and home buying, just to name a few.