Wedding or no wedding?

Maybe you can compromise on a small intimate (immediate family only) wedding or a courthouse wedding with a small dinner reception at a restaurant. That would give your FH the wedding, and you the small event you're wanting

Micro-weddings are IN right now. This might be a good compromise for you two. It is only your closest family and friends but you can still have a ceremony, reception/dinner. It can be FANCY too! Some venues offer a discount for a small weddings or if you know someone with a nice backyard you could have a setup like that (pictured below). You can save money but still have something really nice that your fiance will appreciate.

Here's some inspiration

Coulf you elope and then have a big party (kinda like the reception) when you get back?

You can make your wedding into anything you want or don't want it to be. Don't like alot of people? Only have your closest friends or family there. Don't want alot of decor and fuus? Find a venue that includes everything and is minimal. Want it to feel really special? Have a destination wedding somewhere far away from home. I mean, any expectation you have for what a wedding is supposed to be can be changed. The only thing you need is bride, groom, officiant (in some states you don't even need one!), and a witness. Maybe you and your FH can lay out what's important to each of you and come up with a good compromise.