Wedding intrusion or double wedding ok?

I honestly wouldn't like that. I already have been asked. My father and stepmom have been engaged for 5 years and since he knows am arranging everything for my wedding he also asked me to have a double wedding. Sorry but this is my day not trying to be rude or anything As well if we have double wedding we might to increase our gustlist along with their friends. It's enough am having trouble looking for a place much more having to share my day with my stepmom on top of that having her have a say. It's my dream so I told him Nope. He has to make his own plans.

I would definitely check with your FH first. I know if FH's sister asked this, I'd be upset.

Personally, I think if you and your FH are ok with it, why not? Of course you should consult with your FH first. Then I would sit down with your brother and FSIL. If you truly don't mind and it wouldn't be something that you would hold against them or be irritated by, I would then sit down with them and make sure that it's not something that they would regret. If you are close and can make it work, I think it would afford you the opportunity to make wonderful memories.

Thank you everyone for your advice. I am still a little wishy washy on the whole idea. I love the idea of being able to help my brother out and share this experience with him, but I dont want my FH and his FB to feel sidelined by our family.

As far as I am understanding he will be paying for the preacher and I'm not sure if they want to join in on the congrats and festivities like first dance, cake cutting, etc. Lots to discuss and decide.

I would suggest you to ask his fiancee also about all this......Tell her that he asked this help from you.....But yes its your day and if you are really really close to your brother then I would say that let him do that........You will not loose anything and as he said he will do whatever he can with cost then its hardly matters........This way you help your brother also and he can manage his finance also by not having a grand wedding......

I aree with many other previous posters that both you and your brother's fiance deserve your own wedding and anviersary. Im sure it would be possible for them to do a wedding with a tight budget my FH and I are we just have to wait a little longer than w would like.

If all your brother wants is a little private ceremony. One why should you have the same wedding anniversary and two, Why can't he make arrangements with the preacher for a small ceremony on another day then? I would say no. They need their own wedding date. Becuase it will get mentioned during your reception and then the spot light will be on both brides you and her.

I agree with Meghan. Why don't you offer to pay for an officiant for their wedding day as a gift, if money isn't an issue for you? Then they could have their own day, and you could have yours. They could celebrate with a small dinner at a restaurant afterwards. I love my brother very much, and I would probably be tempted to say yes to him if this were our situation, but I think you both will feel better about it if you have separate days.

Well, I would do it but I am super close with my siblings. When my aunt got married (she is close to my age), her brother and his fiance got married before her wedding. Only a few people came early for it and it wasn't anything special. The day was still devoted to my aunt and her husband. Noone else really knew it took place beforehand.

Nope. Hate to sound like a bridezilla here, but here goes: them having their own wedding off to the side is stealing your thunder and your day. You paid for this wedding , the day i about you, by letting them do this, I think it DISCOUNTS your day. Also, now the celebration is not only about your new life, it's about someone else, and I dunno about you, but there are very few days in this life when it's all about you all, and I want that for us.

Our wedding day will still be ours, they aren't having a second cake or bouquet toss or anything like that. This is Fh's first marriage and if brother and his FW want to pay for and borrow the preacher a few hours before or after our wedding FH is ok with it, as long as it doesn't take away from us.

Haven't talked to brother about it since he brought it up so I am waiting to see how his FW reacts.

Agree with singing Diva.

And btw, you are being very understanding and sweet. It just makes me ANGRY that your brother even thinks it's OK to ask you that. What a position to put you in. Sorry, just how I see it. NOT COOL.