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Savvy September 2020

Wedding Guests - How many no-shows can I expect?

on September 17, 2013 at 8:21 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 16

My fiance and I chose to keep our wedding somewhat small (75 guests). However, I'm starting to panic a bit because I keep hearing horror stories of weddings where 10-20 guests do not show up. With a wedding as small as ours, I feel like it could make a huge difference. I feel like our reception hall will be empty with only 50ish guests. Our wedding is also on a Friday, and it seems many of our guests didn't pay attention to the date, because we are now getting the "Opps, I didn't realize it was a Friday wedding...I'm trying to get off work early!" I realize there isn't much I can do about it all, but I am trying to get a realistic expectation of how many guests may not show.

16 Comments

Latest activity by Caroline L., on September 17, 2013 at 12:22 PM
  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    My experience is that the smaller the group, the more connected they are to you and the more effort they will make to get there. I honestly don't understand people who rsvp and then don't show, especially with the cost of weddings these days.....

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  • Savvy September 2020
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    You and me both! We are paying for our wedding ourselves, so every little bit counts. Many guests are close family and friends, so I hope that we won't experience many no-shows. I think it being on a Friday will work to our disadvantage though Smiley sad

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  • Amanda
    Master August 2013
    Amanda ·
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    I had 130 guests accept, and about 10 didn't show on the day of. I didn't notice at all at the wedding; it was only after the fact that I realized it. Financially it's a shame and a waste, but what can you do?

    As a rule of thumb, expect all guests you've invited to accept, and all guests who accept to actually attend. Over-inviting is never a good idea.

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  • Emmerdoodle
    Expert April 2014
    Emmerdoodle ·
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    I've heard a couple of different statistics floating around WW, but I've been told you can expect 15-20% of invited guests to decline. I agree with Celia in this situation, though - it seems like you invited family and close friends, all of whom will probably do their best to be there to celebrate your special day. :-)

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  • Mrs V (Roe)
    Master August 2013
    Mrs V (Roe) ·
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    It's difficult to guestimate because it varies. The unwritten rule I think is about 10% and that is pretty much what I got (out of 150 yes RSVP 16 people didn't show or notify us). I wouldn't count on that though as I have heard brides who have more and those who have had pretty much everyone invited show up. If you are worried about not having enough guests, you could always invite more people but then you run the risk of having more than you wish.

    ETA I believe Celia is right and you have a better chance of your guests showing up and if not, letting you know ahead of time so that you can adjust.

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  • Belais
    VIP October 2013
    Belais ·
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    Well, my wedding isn't on a Friday, but it is my second wedding (FI's first). I'm not sure if that's partly making a difference as to whether or not people are coming or not. I know some of my cousins are in college in other states and won't be able to come, which is certainly disappointing...

    I invited 107. Thus far (with the RSVP date on Friday) I have 49 accepted and 41 declined. Also keep in mind that in addition to it being my 2nd wedding and my cousins being in college (or having moved), we invited some of FI's family who we knew wouldn't be able to come due to health/financial reasons.

    But yeah, I was thinking we'd have around 70-75 people...definitely not looking that way.

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  • May
    VIP October 2013
    May ·
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    You're talking about people who accept the invite and then don't show up, right? I'm hoping I'll have none of those!! Money doesn't grow on trees!

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  • Jess08
    Super July 2013
    Jess08 ·
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    We had 45ish people RSVP as coming; we invited 65ish. 1 didn't show up at all. It was DH's grandfather who had said he might not come anyway just depended on how he felt which really bothered DH that he wouldn't even ride with someone. I'd say about 5 people left the reception early too or didn't come to it because they had a long drive home, I guess.

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  • kt2of3
    VIP October 2013
    kt2of3 ·
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    We invited 88 knowing only about 65 would come. The additional guests were the ones we knew wouldn't be able to make it because if distance, etc but we still wanted to include them.

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  • We'llAlwaysHaveParis
    Master November 2013
    We'llAlwaysHaveParis ·
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    At my first wedding, everyone who said they would come did. We had about 20% decline. I'm expecting a higher attendance rate for this wedding because it's smaller (ie people who are closer to us).

    There's no way to judge. It depends on your crowd.

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  • Savvy September 2020
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    We invited 85, but had 10 decline so we are right at what we wanted - 75 guests. However, I'm afraid some of them may not show and we will have a very small crowd the day of :\

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  • Megan
    Expert June 2013
    Megan ·
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    We invited 199 people, 140/150 showed! had about 10 no show no notice that said they were coming!

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  • KrystalH
    VIP September 2012
    KrystalH ·
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    We had 145 people accept and had 10 people no show -- 2 of those were family, and 8 of those were peoples plus ones, so i was pretty PO'd that we had spent wasted money on those people that we had never met in the first place

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  • Deborah
    Super August 2013
    Deborah ·
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    We invited 167 (including small children) and got 126 RSVPs yes (kind of low, but it was an out of town wedding for about half the guests).

    We had 5 people who RSVPed yes and then changed because of health (3) and finances (one couple who would have been traveling from out of state).

    We had 124 show up. One no-show was a jerk (didn't come because his ex was also a guest), the other had a work emergency the morning of the wedding.

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  • Tiffany M. ( Tiffany P.)
    Master August 2012
    Tiffany M. ( Tiffany P.) ·
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    We invited 178 guests, had 135 guests RSVP yes. That's about 75% acceptance rate. But our wedding was out of town for a lot of our guests, anywhere from 2 hours to across the country.

    We only had 2 no shows on the day of the wedding. One was someone's date, don't know why and the other was a family friend from out of town.

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  • Caroline L.
    Expert July 2013
    Caroline L. ·
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    We had a small wedding, with 35 RSVPs, and like you I was worried about guests not showing up. But they all did, and our wedding was on a Sunday.

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