Wedding godparents??

She means sponsors in terms of spiritual guidance counselors (it's a big thing in the PI because divorce isn't allowed there). This is what I found online about it, although I don't know about them signing the marriage license... That's for our MOH and BM:

Filipino Weddings reflect the strong traditions of family (& extended family) and symbolism. Thus, Filipino wedding ceremonies typically involve many people, and the wedding rituals typically "speak" to the couple personally.

Beyond the usual bridal party, the Filipino wedding involves people who are also significant in the couple's life: the Principal Sponsors and the Secondary Sponsors.

The Principal Sponsors (aka Ninang and Ninong): These are women and men whom the bride and groom respect & admire. They are, as in the early days of the Church, sponsors of the couple attesting to their readiness for marriage and freedom to marry. These are often aunts and uncles or close friends of the family. In the Philippines, they are the official witnesses of the state and they sign the marriage license. Worldwide, their participation is symbolic of the wisdom & support they shall offer the new couple. The number of sponsors can vary from a single couple to many couples. The Principal sponsors are part of the bridal procession. At the nuptial blessing, they may also be invited to come up with the celebrant and to extend their right hands to join in the prayer of blessing. In doing so, they are fulfilling their roles as sponsors.

Adding that element to the wedding sounds like a potential for a lot of drama ..... just saying ... if you didn't think of it to begin with then maybe you are better off without doing it.

I can see where you would think that but I guess it would be the same as when someone is baptized or goes through their confirmation sacraments... they always have "sponsors" and it's not really something that someone would expect to be asked because it's not one of those where the closest relative or the only brother and sister are expected to be the sponsors. It's not as dramatic as picking a wedding party, that's for sure. I guess it's more for spiritual guidance in regards to love and religion so it wouldn't be something to fight about or say, "I wonder how come I was never asked," kind of thing.

Idk if it's Catholicism or a Hispanic thing (I'm both so not sure) but anyway, we're having a "sponsor" couple. Which are my aunt and uncle, a couple whose marriage is one to look up to. My mom and MIL requested it. For us it's not a big deal and they don't really have a role besides being up at the altar which is fine by us. I would do it if I were you but if it's something that's going to stress you out, I would say no.

@Michelle Will your wedding party be up there with you, too? Or just your sponsors? Thank you for putting another way (a couple whose marriage is one to look up to) because her closest friend and her husband have been together for so long and have gone through some major shit... so if I thought of it that way then I wouldn't mind having them as my sponsors.

Btw, I don't know if it's a Catholic or a Hispanic/Filipino thing, either, because some churches here will do the coin/cord/veil/candle thing (more so in the cities that are abundant in Filipinos) and other churches won't do it. I never understood what that meant in the contract until now. Haha!

I think it may be more a Filipino thing than a Catholic thing. I officiated a Filipino wedding (civil) that had the sponsors in the procession (they did not stand by me and I don't remember that they signed as witnesses).

Hi Malei. My FH is Filipino and I am not. We will be doing the cord, veil, and candle, as well as choosing sponsors. FH's parents are very traditional, so I can understand exactly where you are coming from. I don't think it would hurt having sponsors, and the cord, veil, and candle and would be a nice way of incorporating Filipino traditions in your wedding. On the other hand, however, I don't think you should choose your mother's friend if you don't feel that she should be your ninang. Choose people who mean something to YOU! My FMIL wants me to have her flower girl's daughter as my flower girl, and unfortunately I don't plan to do that [still haven't broke the news to her yet], but it doesn't make any sense for me to make her one, given that I don't even know this woman or her daughter.

Yes, they will both be up there, as in BP and Sponors. They will also be providing the chord or as we call it the "lazo." The symbolism of the sponsors for us is that we choose a couple who has a great marriage; is involved in the church and that we can essentially go to them if we need advice or "counseling", so that we can be blessed with a great marriage as well.

Thank you all for your feedback! Another thing to mention is that the FH has social anxiety disorder and I don't think he'll be comfortable being up there longer than he needs to be, especially if he doesn't understand what it means. Also, the church I'm having my ceremony at (where I went to middle school) doesn't do the coin/candle ceremonies... it's in their contract. They recommend we do it at the reception but I don't think that will happen either. I discussed this more with my mom and she told me that she had planned on handing down hers and my fathers coin for us to use/have!! I wonder if there's a way that we can subtly incorporate this without going through the blessing of the coins and the official handing them to each other part. Like just have a coin bearer and exchange it once we exchange the rings? Now I'm rethinking the whole ceremony, traditions, and even church. I guess I need to discuss this more with the fiancé and see what he thinks and how he feels... although I know he'll say he'll do whatever I want to. *sigh*

There is a similar custom in Brazil. FH and I plan to do that for our wedding. You can have them in the ceremony without having them sign the marriage liscense if it's important to you for your MOH and BM to do that.

If you do do this, don't choose people because you are pressured into it. This is a very special role and should only be given to people you truly admire and whose marriage you might want to imitate. It shouldn't involve hardly any drama if you choose mature adults.

We are going to have our sponsors (we call them "padrinhos") come up during the prociessional and take a seat of honor when they are not actively involved in the ceremony.

I would definitely explain in depth to your FH what the sponsors are there for and anything they will be doing.

Well, it's a quaint thought, but how does anyone really know what couple has a great marriage? So great, in fact, that you'd go to them for counseling and advice.

Your mom has her culture and her beliefs. There is no reason you have to share them, although I wouldn't disrespect or ridicule what she obviously hoped you'd embrace. This is something parents deal with every day -- from their children disregarding the faith in which they were raised, to their choices in careers, to their educational goals (or lack of them), to their decisions to forego having children, to their choices in political views and life partners. This is just one more proof that you are, in many ways, emancipated.

So, next time the subject comes up, gently tell her that you have other plans.

There's really nothing else you can do -- you either do it her way, your way, or you compromise what you want and do some of it, but not all of it. I think you should do exactly what you want.