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Beginner September 2018

"volunteers" at your wedding?

COLO92218, on July 13, 2018 at 3:57 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 53

Hi all!

I have a few things at my wedding that I need to employ help with. One of them is a 'cell phone check' where our guests will check their cell phones and get a tag (similar to coat check). The phones will be kept in a chest and monitored at all times. The second is a photo booth. The photo booth is all our own equipment (we're both photographers), and I just want to make sure that no one messes it up too bad, and that there's someone there to assist people.

I had some friends ask me "let me know if you need any help for your wedding" that are not invited, and i literally just want to ask them "will you check cell phones for me".

Is that something that's even cool to do? All my friends know that we are limited on space and stuff so they're pretty aware that I would invite them if i could, but I also don't want to ask them to do something and spend the whole night bored.

Alternatively could I pay someone from the catering company to do these things?


Latest activity by Sarah, on July 13, 2018 at 6:49 PM
  • NVV2B
    VIP January 2019
    NVV2B ·
    • Flag

    I am cringing at your cell phone check. Personally - I would not check my cell phone and I would keep it on silent in my purse. I am not a child in school and I do not need to check in my cell phone for any reason. I would get rid of this all together and ask your officiant to make an announcement that you are having an unplugged ceremony.

    For the photo booth - I think that is ok if they genuinely want to help with this. I would have multiple friends help in shifts so that way one person doesn't have to stay there the entire reception.

  • Ashley
    Dedicated January 2018
    Ashley ·
    • Flag

    I would look into hiring a photo booth company- that way if something does get messed up, its their equipment not yours and they have an attendant to monitor things.

    As far as the cell phone check, as a guest, I'd be remiss to hand over my cellphone to anyone, period. If you are trying to go unplugged, make a sign or an announcement, but I would be insulted if you asked me to hand over my cell phone as I am an adult and can manage myself at a wedding. Adults should be able to keep their own personal property on their person, and should be able to follow "unplugged" guidelines if asked.

  • Officiallymrs
    Super May 2010
    Officiallymrs ·
    • Flag
    I think for the photo booth you should pay someone to do it .. maybe you m ow a teenager who could use some extra $$, I wouldn’t just ask someone to do it for free, you also have to feed them as if they were a vendor and at that point you may as well have invited them as a guest..
    as for the cell phone check, you should probably 86 it ... I’m not handing my cell phone over to anyone I don’t know and as a guest you may get a side eye about it
  • Ashley
    Devoted November 2018
    Ashley ·
    • Flag

    I agree with other people that have commented, I would not hand over my cell phone. We are doing an unplugged ceremony.

  • Nikki
    Devoted October 2018
    Nikki ·
    • Flag
    I think it's okay to have friends help with the photobooth thing but you need to think twice about checking people's cellphones. You have no idea what's going on in someones life. People need their phones for emergency situations. I keep my phone on me at all times 1. My daughter has medical issues and I may need to be contacted, and 2. I am a sexual assault survivor and never go somewhere I can't reach help. And honestly I'm just not trusting handing over an expensive piece of technology for something so trivial. Have an unplugged sign and have your officiant make an announcement.
  • L
    Savvy November 2018
    Liliana ·
    • Flag
    Cell phone check? Is it your wedding or high school? I think it is not cool ask your guess to leave their phone to somebody else.
  • HayMrsO
    Master October 2018
    HayMrsO ·
    • Flag

    I agree with others...no way am I handing over my cell phone to anyone else. I understand what your intentions are, but this is one thing that , as a guest, I would not comply with.

    If your friends are people that you would trust to handle your photo equipment, then by all means, use them to help. I think that is a great way to include them in the day.

  • M
    Mim ·
    • Flag
    I agree with the others. Ask some people, who have asked how they could help, to man the photo booth is fine. Just be sure to have enough people doing it so that they still get to enjoy the party. Honestly though, I'd hire someone.

    Asking your guests to turn over their phones is simply a bad idea. You are running the very real risk of people thinking very poorly of you for being so controlling. I wouldn't want my guests thinking that I was a control freak.
  • Tpatb
    Master August 2019
    Tpatb ·
    • Flag
    I agree the cell phone check isn’t going to go over well with many at all, as I would not give mine up period. If it is an unplugged wedding having an announcement and signage will be much better. Someone could need their phone in case of an emergency & you say they will be watched but something could happen to a phone & then you’d be liable. Maybe you can hire a coordinator or an assistant to help w/ booth?? I’d probably feel some type of way if I wasn’t invited but were asked to man a camera..will they still get to eat during reception or will they have to watch everyone else? If they are up to helping you bc they simply want to however, I see nothing wrong with it!
  • Maria
    Master June 2018
    Maria ·
    • Flag

    I would never let go of my phone that I work very hard to pay for. Absolutely not. Unless you're Beyonce, no way.

  • FutureMrsKC
    Master January 2019
    FutureMrsKC ·
    • Flag

    I stopped reading at cell phone check. I 100% would never give anyone my phone. That's absurd and uncalled for. Please do not do this, I think you will have a lot of unhappy and confused guests.

    Your guests are adults, not school children. You officiant can make an announcement to politely quiet cell phones and refrain from using them for the unplugged ceremony. Also, a sign would get the job done.

    No one is handing over their phones, if you can't tell from these comments.

  • emcknight1517
    Super April 2018
    emcknight1517 ·
    • Flag

    I literally winced when I read "cell phone check". Please don't do this to your guests. Why do you need phones monitored? You WILL have guests ignore your unplugged ceremony request. It's something you'll have to accept. I literally saw my aunt taking a video during my ceremony (yes our officiant announced it was an unplugged ceremony), but I didn't let it bother me. She didn't post it on social media and she didn't interrupt our ceremony or get in the way of the photographer.

    I do think you should hire a company to manage the photo booth so if something goes wrong, you and your volunteers aren't liable. I can imagine friendships being ruined if something were to go wrong. Let guests be guests. I'm sure most people are only asking to help to be polite.

  • Susan
    Super November 2018
    Susan ·
    • Flag
    As PP said, I’m not handing over my cell phone, no matter what. Honestly if you insisted on it I would probably just lie and keep it in my purse.
  • Farrah
    Devoted September 2019
    Farrah ·
    • Flag
    Where did you get the cell phone check idea? Not judging, but That's not normal and not a good idea. There is no way I would hand MY phone over to anyone and if it was mandatory, I would probably avoid the wedding all together
  • Sarah
    Master June 2016
    Sarah ·
    • Flag
    If someone made me hand over my phone somewhere, I’d leave. I have small children, and if God forbid there was an emergency, your wedding, or anything else in life isn’t important enough for me to miss that call.
  • K
    Super September 2018
    Kate ·
    • Flag
    I would ask someone to help with the photobooth but...yeah I'm not giving you my phone. That's weird. How did you come up with wanting to do that
  • Marissa
    Expert August 2019
    Marissa ·
    • Flag
    I’m sorry but no to the cell phone check. You are not a celebrity or marrying royalty (I assume). I have to have my phone on me at all times due to my work. I literally would not be able to attend if I had to hand over my phone. I am capable of putting it on silent to cause no disturbance and I am also able to excuse myself if my work needs me. Plus if my phone gets damaged or lost whose responsible for paying for a new one for me? Because I would be looking at the bride and groom to replace it.
    Just put up a sign or have the officiant announce it’s an unplugged ceremony.
  • OrangeCrush
    Super October 2017
    OrangeCrush ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Or Prince. My sister had to hand hers over at Paisley Park!

    OP - I, too, stopped reading at "cell phone check." I did this with my middle schoolers, don't do it to grownups.

  • Jaycie
    Expert March 2019
    Jaycie ·
    • Flag
    I would highly advise against a cell phone check in. I'm all about an unplugged ceremony, but we intend to have a sign and my coordinator make an announcement.
    I'm not a parent yet and even I know theres no way in hell you can take a phone away from someone who has a child (probably with a sitter) in the event of an emergency and need to be reached. Also your guests are adults. If you think they'll disregard an unplugged ceremony requests, then maybe they shouldn't be the ones getting an invite.
    As for the photobooth I'd recommend hiring someone who provides their own equipment. Especially if you're having alcohol at your wedding. Definitely need to hire legitimate staff for stations if you really see as necessary cause that's rude to someone hoping to be a guest and then given a job and unable to enjoy the night. If I thought I'd be invited to a wedding of a friend and didn't get an invite but was asked to work a ridiculous station of taking peoples phones I'd be kinda pissed.
  • Carrie
    Devoted September 2016
    Carrie ·
    • Flag
    Another addition on the not handing over my phone. I always turn my phone on silent, and I never take pictures at wedding ceremonies even when its not unplugged. I'm an adult, and I can handle it. i would refuse to give up my phone, period.

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