Venue Regret

Just a few more pictures for reference

The photos are of the venue you chose? I absolutely love them!

Since most of it is outside, what are the backup options for inclement weather? With COVID though, I think that having a more outdoorsy wedding is a good bet.

I don't think that the Save the Dates being printed already should box you into the venue, though. I'm not sure how much you put down already, but losing 50% on a deposit could be a much more substantial sum, so I see what your FH means.

Did you guys make a pro and con list of each? It seems like the venue you chose has things you both want and is a nice, affordable compromise.

I didn't have venue regret, but I wish we could've afforded a different venue. I fell in love with a local winery, but it was a $12k minimum to rent the space, and that was out of the question. I see wedding pictures from there all the time and they're just so beautiful, but I'm happy that we went with a less popular venue that actually ended up being more unique and "us." The pictures we got are stunning, and they're something different than the same shots I see over and over again from my dream venue.

View Quoted Comment The photos are of the venue we chose 😊 a couple are from their IG page, and a few others are ones we took on the day we toured it.


I have been to the venue before for several events when I was in college (it’s attached to my old university), so I already know the food is delicious.
If we cancel the venue now, we are out $1000 (we’ve paid $2000 so far). We would also have to cancel the deposit on the church for the day we booked and rebook on a different day; the date we chose was the church’s only available day in September.
We made a list of pros and cons a couple of months ago and at the time we both loved that it wasn’t the typical wedding venue. I completely get what you mean about the $12k minimum for the winery. A place we wanted to look at was $10k just to book for the day, plus $120/person for catering. It was 100000% out of the question.
I live in Los Angeles, and September is a still pretty warm outside so I’m not too concerned with the weather but the venue does offer tenting in the event of rain.
FH recommends going and checking the venue out again soon. He says he thinks it’ll bring back those initial feelings of why we fell in love with it. He said that if I still have regret after I see it again, we can discuss a plan B.

View Quoted Comment

Aww, I think FH's recommendation sounds perfect! You've picked a good one.

Jealous of your weather! I'm in northeast Ohio and it can be summer one day and snow the next. So frustrating, lol!

I do genuinely love your venue pictures, though! Italian romance, beautiful outdoor lighting, and delicious food on top of it? I don't think you can go wrong with your current venue, but you'll have to see how you feel.

DH and I went back to our venue several times throughout the planning process of course, and each time we just got more and more excited and were that much more firm in our decision.

Omg I would 100% book that venue for myself if I could. That is gorgeous, and definitely has a European vibe! I love it. What is it about the other venue that makes you second guess this one? I would never look at this venue and think of it as a "second choice" venue, if that makes sense. I keep scrolling back up to look at the pics lol, it's so beautiful!

That venue looks GORGEOUS!!! I love it! However, it's you and your fiance's opinions that matter here. I really like your fiance's suggestion - go look at your venue again in person! If you still don't feel the same about it, then I agree it may make sense to look more seriously into the other venue. Otherwise, once you go see it again, you'll likely remember why you booked this venue in the first place, and may decide to keep it. In any case, I don't think you could make a wrong decision either way!

I think that venue looks absolutely beautiful. Even though they offer 50% refund, I would just stay there. Especially since your save the dates have already been printed. I'm sure your wedding will still look and feel magical. Our venue isn't my first choice and although we were able to book my first choice, some things happened to where we had to cancel and move forward. It still hurts thinking about it sometimes but I do like our current venue though. You just have to hold on to the reasons you fell in love with it in the first place. Maybe one day you can do a vow renewal at the venue you originally wanted. That's what we plan on doing.

Your venue is gorgeous! As someone who lost their venue deposit (due to other reasons), I would just focus on what really drew you to your venue in the first place and not what you feel like you're missing out on at the other venue that wasn't available.

Based on the photos it looks pretty good to me. I would’ve loved having my venue be at someplace that was a lot nicer but at the end of the day I chose places that fit my budget more

I love the photos very pretty and you have an outside ballroom it looks amazing so many pretty unique photos opps

It's not my type of venue but everyone has a different ideal vision. It does indeed look Italian to me. Isn't that what you were going for?!

View Quoted Comment Awe I’m sorry it’s not your type of venue, but sharing that isn’t helpful in a post about venue regret. Thank you for your feedback though. Quite kind of you to chime in 😊

OK, first of all, the venue is absolutely beautiful! So the good news is, no matter which venue you choose, your wedding will be at a beautiful location 🙂 Second, how amazing is your fiancé? I think his response was perfect. Go see the venue again and see if it ignites that excitement you had the first time. If it doesn’t, then $1000 isn’t that horrible an amount to be out of in order to get the wedding of your dreams. After all, you only have one shot at your wedding, you don’t want to look back forever with regret. And it sounds like FH is supportive of switching locations if it means making your dream come true. 💕

View Quoted Comment I'm sorry love. Maybe I didn't express it correctly. I'm not Italian nor do I have an interest in that theme/style. You specifically wrote "Italian romance" theme was your goal. I'm telling you that this venue NAILS it!!!
yIyou specifically wrote, "tell me your thoughts.." I refuse to metaphorically smile in your face and tell you a lie. That is not caring. My venue goal is completely something else. No better nor worse than yours, just different. Having different opinions on this forum is what keeps it interesting. If this hurts your feelings then you may encounter much worse in the future from others. Again, I genuinely believe you achieved the vision you had for your venue. My vision for my venue is no better no worse, just different.

View Quoted Comment My theme is Italian romance because my parents are immigrants from Italy. My extended family in Italy is unable to attend the wedding because they can’t afford the airfare. My grandparents are deceased and I’ll have ZERO extended family at my wedding. The Italian theme is to feel like part of my roots and culture is at my wedding. Not everyone’s cup of tea, but I love my theme. I will have three family members there. FH will have 75.


Thank you again for the feedback. I mean the gratitude genuinely

View Quoted Comment Thank you!!


And yes, my FH is incredible and super supportive. He wants our day to be perfect.
It’s absolutely a beautiful venue, I’m just bummed out it’s missing the indoor ballroom. Our coordinator said we can make it look like an outdoor ballroom so we are probably going to make it work for us! 💞

View Quoted Comment I wont have any extended family at my wedding nor my father who abandoned me when I was younger.


I don't know my family's ancestry because they were slaves, actual property. We still carry the last name of the most recent slave owner.
If you love your theme then that's all that matters. 💓💓💓
Take care.

View Quoted Comment Sorry to hear. Hugs 🤗 hope you still have a beautiful wedding.

That venue is beautiful! But if you are not 100% happy with your decision I would change it.

I actually had a similar experience! I fell in love with a venue on our tour and we were planning on Friday August 21, 2021. When we decided to move forward and let the church know the date they were not able to accommodate that day and said they only did Saturday weddings. I tried to reach back out to the venue to see if Saturday, August 7th was available, but the cost was also $2000 more for a Saturday.

Another venue I had like I kept popping up on ads and other things so I looked at it again and had to try to convince my fiance to change venues. We did a second tour of it and fell in love with it and luckily they had the date I wanted available August 7, 2021. So then I went ahead and booked it. I'm so happy with my decision I made. I have not had second thoughts on what if on another venue since.

View Quoted Comment Molly, thank you for understanding my feelings 😊


I must say, though, that one thing this thread has helped me to do is revisit the reason why I fell in love with our venue. The one missing piece for me was the indoor ballroom attached to a terrace, but I am pretty confident I can make this outdoor wedding venue feel like an outdoor ballroom. I looked at some videos FH and I took of the venue when we last scoped it out and I fell in love with it all over again.
I’m really thankful for all of the positive feedback and validation on this thread. I can’t wait for my wedding on 09.25.2021