UO: I DON'T want to open gifts in front of guests at a shower.

My MOH is hosting me a very small shower (10-15 people I believe) and it will just be my family and best friends, so I won't mind opening the gifts.. It hopefully won't take too long. I agree with PP's that it's super boring.. I find most showers boring in general, and the gifts are usually the final event before people can start leaving.

It was a tiny bit awkward for me to open gifts but honestly I don't think many of the shower guests even paid attention. I have heard of showers where the bride greets guests, opens the gift, and thanks them at that point instead of waiting to open them all at one time. Not sure how well that flows but it seems better than having clear gift wrap.

To begin with I didn't want a shower let alone open gifts in front of anyone. Its terribly awkward and my family made me do it a few years ago at my baby shower. I unfortunately suffered from a miscarriage a few weeks ago. I found out the morning of my bachelorette party, the next morning was my SURPRISE bridal shower! Everyone knew because my FMIL doesn't know how to keep her mouth shut and I wanted nothing to do with any of it. I basically told everyone thank you for coming and for the gifts but there is not way I'm going to sit here and open them. I went home right after eating cake and laid in bed for hours. I didn't even open any of the gifts for a few days after only because FH wanted to.

I guess UO here, but i dont care for gift opening at showers and would be thrilled if the bride just hung out, mingled and drank with the guests. i like the no wrapping idea (not clear wrapping though, its not like people have that laying around). That way the bride can still see who got what and thank everyone without the hour long opening process. I don't see them not opening my gift as offensive, I see it as a gift to me as a guest to be just be able to drink mimosas and mingle for 3 hours and not have to pretend to care that aunt sue got you a table runner.

The best shower I've been too made the gift opening fun and interactive. We all had blank bingo boards and there were a few copies of items off her registry floating around and we got to fill in our bingo boards with things off her registry to try and win bingo.

It was nice cause it made us pay attention but while keeping it fun as well! Winners got little things like a bag of chocolates/ candy or can coozies

I see where you're coming from since I struggle with social anxiety and being in the spotlight to that degree makes me queasy. I also tend to be pretty stoic so showing extreme enthusiasm just isn't me. I'll probably ask my FSIL to sit with me to be the one recording the names/gifts after I open and I'm sure she'll be loud enough for the both of us

I don't like to be the center of attention either but this is really one of the first worldy-iest problems to have.

^--- that lol

Have them bring the gifts unwrapped. Save time and save a tree.

@ Kellie: That sounds super fun and great.

I had my shower a couple of weeks ago and everyone was having such a good time mingling and playing games that we ran out of time to open gifts. My MOH talked to the guests and got a feel of what they wanted, and the general consensus was that no one even wanted to watch me open gifts. I was surprised but happy to oblige since I didn't want to pause the good time, and I sent Thank You notes immediately after.

It's not too terribly difficult to paste a smile on you face and sound off a looped rote of cliched comments. Everyone expects it and it's a part of the social etiquette of a shower-- be it bridal or baby. If it bothers you and you wish to not do it or become comfortable with this social custom, decline the shower.

A girl I know started opening gifts right when we all kind of sat down and progressively opened them during the shower - then she would pick names & the name picked got a prize - then we ate and she took a break from presents - then after brunch she started up again and broke it up by picking more names for prizes, but everyone mingled and hung out and didn't really pay attention to her. It was easy and breezy and she would just announce "this one is from aunt Jane" and aunt Jane would watch her and then go about mingling after it was opened

I know it's a first world problem to not want to open gifts, I'm not trying to complain about people's generosity. I'm asking about the etiquette because of my general social anxiety and introversion.

I really am just trying to get out of having a shower, but if I end up with one I'll just say I'm opening the gifts "after" the shower, so the guests that don't care can leave

You don't have to open gifts at your shower if you don't want to. My family has thrown a handful of showers where on the invites it says something along the lines of "go green and save on wrapping" What happens is the couple greets guests as they come in and can take a look at what they brought and/or open it in front of them and say thank you! It prevents the awkward time of everyone staring at your while you're opening and gives more time for people to mingle! Our family loves it! Everyone always follows up with handwritten thank yous in the mail as well.

I'm with you on the UO, maybe it's just because my FMIL forces us to do it for every single thing. My daughter's birthday party it took us literally an hour to get through all the presents and you could tell after the first 5 minutes everyone wanted to shoot themselves. I personally would not mind at all if no one opened my present in front of me, in fact I find it a bit embarrassing. But I know that's a UO. We always send thank you cards of course and say thank yous to everyone in person multiple times. I just personally think it's more miserable for everyone than anything

I don't want to open gifts either, so I'm not having a shower.

I've told anyone who's mentioned it or asked me and I think they'll respect my wishes because they know me and it probably wouldn't go over very well. Not to sound ungrateful, but yeah.

I remember throwing a fit when I was a child because I didn't want to open birthday gifts in front of everyone.

Aww...that's the best part. As a guest I love seeing the bride's reaction to the gift. You are literally being showered. Enjoy it!!

You have to otherwise it looks rude, like you don't appreciate their gifts.