Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Just Said Yes October 2016

Uninterested MIL

Flag
Hide content

EJY, on August 14, 2016 at 12:09 AM

Has anyone experienced a future MIL who has shown no interest in the wedding? We're getting married in less than 3 months and her only concern was getting from NJ to MA and collecting the money from her family for staying in a hotel down the cape. BTW, we are bringing the wedding from TX (where we live) to the east coast (where our families lives) so I'm not sympathetic to having drive a few hours (since a flight across the country was the alternative). Other than that, the wedding may as well be non existent. My fiance's bday is the day before the wedding and we're having a rehearsal at noon on that same day. I'm going to host the party that night because if I don't, who will? No one else has certainly offered or asked to contribute. For what it's worth, I'm also paying for over 75% of the wedding myself so I'm financially sensitive at this point. Just not sure what, if anything, I should do at this point....

Show all

43 Comments

VIP March 2016
Crescent 1894 · on August 14, 2016 at 10:22 AM
Flag

Hide content
My MIL didn't really seem to care either. At first I was hurt, but she and my mom spent a lot of time together at Christmas, and my MIL said she didn't want to step on my or my mom's toes. She had a really bad experience when my BIL and his wife got married, so she just decided to step back completely except for the rehearsal dinner. I was hurt at first but I understood. She definitely cared! She still did a "rehearsal dinner" and took my cousin, her husband, my BIL, niece, and DH and me out for dinner the night before we got married.
- Reply
Master July 1867
OGJessieJV · on August 14, 2016 at 10:45 AM
Flag

Hide content
What always strikes me about these posts is often the OP forgets that they are marrying into this family. How you treat your inlaws and how they treat you during the wedding process will set-up how the rest of your marriage will go. Your wedding is one day, your marriage is going to be a lot longer, learn to deal with your inlaws personalities and foibles, don't expect money from them.
- Reply

VIP March 2017
FutureMrs.DCT · on August 14, 2016 at 10:45 AM
Flag

Hide content
@OP ina reply you said she will talk about the wedding when brought up. It sounds like she is interested in her own way. In fact she sounds wonderful, interested when the topic comes up, but not pushing her ideas on you.

My FMIL doesn't seem interested in the wedding either, except when they were here in June. She asked about what I wanted her to wear. That was it. We're not counting on them paying for the rehearsal either, as they don't have a lot of money. My mom is also not that involved. She already planned one wedding with me, so I guess she's done. I ask her opinion and she'll give it, but she doesn't ask how planning is going. That's just how things are and I accept it.
- Reply