Unhappy bride

I thank all of you for your advice. I have had time to talk with my venue and I'm only using it for the ceremony. So I owe her nothing else. Now I just need a reception hall and we're looking for somewhere that eliminates most of the vendors that I need by including some of my needed items such as linen, bar, food and tableware. Which this first venue did not.

However now my issue is guest list. Together we have 11 grandkids. Would it be rude to say it's an adult reception if in fact our grandkids will be there?

Oh my I am so sorry you are feeling like this. I am sending you a huge hug. That’s why we are here to help and support each other and celebrate with each other through this journey. I also think canceling it isn’t going to help. You can have a beautiful beautiful wedding without spending too much or breaking the bank you just have to take your time and look for good deals look at different times off-season prices even smaller menus can make a big difference . Breathe !!!!!! Breathe breathe !!! Everything happens for a reason, I’m sure you look stunning in your dress. Don’t let the shows and media over take your vision of your wedding. You are marrying the love of your life and THAT is what a wedding is about !!! I would sit and talk to your FH about it and how you are feeling .. maybe you guys can come up with a solution so you feel better about it all !

View Quoted Comment Nope ! Our daughter (4years old) and our 2 nephews and 2 nieces will be at the wedding - NO other kids are coming

I’m sorry you are going through this. Know that you are not alone. My FH and I went through the same thing. He was worried about cost and it made me feel as if he didn’t want to marry me. Then we sat down and talked through it, and set a realistic budget we can afford. I don’t think it’s rude to say adults only and invite your grandkids. You have to draw the line somewhere with guests, or it will be out of hand!! My FH has 11 nieces/nephews. They are all invited, but we are not inviting kids other than immediate family. Weddings are expensive and reserved for those closest to you. No matter what you do, someone somewhere will be unhappy. So just do you!

You can absolutely have only your grandchildren there. Your idea to go with an all inclusive venue is a great idea. That’s what my daughter did (except for the DJ and photographer) and it was beautiful! Hers even included the cake and fresh flowers for the tables. It was not only less expensive, but less stress too and came with a Coordinator.

You know what I’ve learned about weddings they are NOTHING like TV lol . Say yes to the dress failed me too. I had so many disappointments during my wedding planning with my family’s support and with life itself . I believe everyone ends up having the wedding of their dreams . The trick is that Sometimes some of us have no clue what the wedding of our dreams really is . I just knew since I was a little girl I was going to have a huge wedding with all the bells and whistles but life unfortunately didn’t agree . Once I stopped fighting it and went with the flow of it all I found my dream day . No it’s not going to be a huge wedding . I will still wear my dress though except to a courthouse where my pastor will pray before and after the ceremony. I will still have photos which are a 3 hour package so they didn’t cost very much . I will still have a reception except it will be at a restaurant downtown where I’m renting out the upstairs area . This place works for my budget bc I just have to pay for the food not the room. My favorite part of all this is no matter what I get to marry my very best friend and we get to say goodbye to our long distance relationship. I say all of this to say life and wedding are soo complicated it can be crazy and frustrating but it’s not worth your relationship with your love. Simply sitting down making a few compromises on what you HAVE to have and what you can possibly do without can help build the wedding of your dreams . It can be that no matter the budget you just have decide how to make it that ! Sorry for the long post I just really feel you on the frustration .

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. I understand & go through my own moments. One thing to consider is how & when you are venting to him. It makes a huge difference. You truly can have a beautiful day even on a tight budget...first you must believe it & know that at the end of the day, you get each other! Try to remember, it is one beautiful & sentimental day that you both deserve to enjoy to the fullest but it is just that one day. You have the rest of your lives to have many more special memories together.

I'm sorry you are feeling like this, it should be happy. Could your expectations for a "Beautiful" wedding be too hight? Is it possible to have a small budget-friendly beautiful wedding in your eyes so that you'll still want to get married? If not...then maybe just stay engaged for a few more years until you can afford the wedding you want.

Beautiful Weddings happen all the time on a budget. There were some gorgeous peaceful parks I had looked at for a good price, and depending on the time of year you don't have to deal with much, if any, foot traffic.

Maybe just take some time to think about things, talk with your FH, work through some obstacles, then come back around.

In the end it's all about who you are marrying. So if your calling off the wedding it sounds like you mean you don't want to marry him, but in all reality it sounds like your just calling off the wedding "event" not the engagement.

Wish you loads of luck. You can do this, together, with your FH.