Trying to pick my style

I personally think rustic is overdone so when my husband and I got married I knew that was a trend I definitely wanted to avoid. He was thankfully on the same page. As for shabby chic, I'm honestly not sure what that even means. My advice is just to pick what you like. It doesn't have to be a certain theme. In fact, I think themes can end up looking tacky and possibly end up looking outdated later on.

I think you should mirror your personal style rather than worrying about a theme.

Rustic can be done beautifully without a single stitch of burlap, mason jars or wooden paletts. Real country doesn't have any of those if you go for a drive out to the countryside.

But is it you? Pick what fits you, not a dream aesthetic that doesn't have any part of your everyday lives. Do a search for each of those on Pinterest to see what they are.

It doesn't matter what is "in".

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I agree to mirror your style.. However a theme is another name for aesthetic/vibe to make everything cohesive rather than random.

It's not required, but it can make everything easier and less expensive, if you let your venue's style guide the decor style of your wedding. So, how is that historic manor decorated? I bet it's not rustic, for instance.

I wouldn't lock yourself into a named style yet. Look at your venue, photos of other weddings that happened there, and color/style pics on the web. Hone in on the one style that seems to pull everything together at the venue and that works with your personal style. Matching the season isn't required either, but it can be a handy way to come up with a color palette.

Once you have a set of photos of things that seem to go, see what the style is called (there will be multiple names for it). Then you have your style name and can use that word or phrase to do more research.

One last note: it doesn't matter in the slightest if something is "in" or not. What matters is if you like it and if you can make it work within your budget.

I agree with PP to let your venue guide the style of your wedding/decor. It will make things so much easier!

View Quoted Comment I agree with this 100%.

View Quoted Comment I agree, rustic is done a lot, but I actually am a country girl. Not a farm girl, but grew up in small town USA. My bio grandfather was a legit cowboy, so I've always been drawn to that aesthetic. I think having a theme can help create a cohesive vision for the day, and "beautiful" and "magical" might not paint the same picture in everyone's head, lol.

View Quoted Comment I'm a small town U.S.A girl, so I've always enjoyed the rustic aesthetic. I am a suckered for mason jars and lace, but burlap makes me think of a potato sack. Since we're not having a barn wedding though, I do wonder if rustic really works with the venue. Which is where the shabby chic comes in, it's kind of like a vintage/rustic feel. I just worry about doing something that will feel dated the day my guests arrive, but if I choose something that doesn't fit my own personality that will make the day feel forced. Your right, who cares what is "in"? It's my day, right?

View Quoted Comment I wonder if manor was the right word? It's a beautiful Queen Anne "Painted Lady" house in a small town with views of the mountains, sweet garden, and TREES! So many trees! Which is why I am leaning towards these three aesthetics. I do think maybe I need to wait until I talk with my planner on Sunday. Thank you for all your advice.

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There are alot of rustic venues are done up with white paint over wood..which becomes shabby chic. Shabby chic personally reminds me of summertime tea parties and vintage farmhouses...the all white white ones.

None of those will be dated. As long as you and fiance like them, that's all that matters.

So it sounds like your venue is a lot like mine! We're getting married at a beautiful historic house in a small downtown area and our ceremony will be on their patio in the garden with lots of trees. Rather than going rustic (I also don't like the thought of burlap and rustic is a little played out) I am going for more of a vintage upscale garden party feel. I am renting vintage furniture to be out by the fire pit in the garden where I plan on having a cigar roller for people to sit outside of the tent and enjoy their cigars. It already really goes with the vibe of my venue and I'm kind of just following the venue manager/coordinators advice on things she has seen before that have worked really well.

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Erin, that is amazing! I bet your guests talk about your cigar roller for years to come.

Thank you, Brides, for all your advice. The day we got engaged I picked up a book. I was looking through it yesterday, and stumbled upon a hint for decorating. They said to pick a texture alongside your colors. That advice snowballed into me spending quite sometime last night and tonight looking up tactile textures for flower arrangements, fabric types, and materials. I created lists that I made my fiance pick from, and we came up with a vision instead of a theme.

Soft flowers, lace and cotton fabrics, sharp angles in vases and other elements made of wood, glass, paper, and silver, with touches of greenery.

My opinion is that a garden party sounds beautiful, unique and perfect for spring!! Downside though, consider how much you would spend on flowers! At least with a different theme, like rustic, you could pick cheaper flowers that still look beautiful.


I also agree with trying to choose something that is in line with your venue. Good luck!