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Savvy September 2021

Too soon for Invites?

Katie, on April 15, 2021 at 11:55 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 11

Our wedding is 9/18/21.

I originally wanted to send our invites around the first week of July which would be well within the normal 8-12 weeks period.

But, I'm now worried about mailing times (USPS has severely delayed several things for me recently) & if invites get lost, I want to have time to resend...

We've been getting invites about 3 months out for most of our other weddings this year, but I got one in early March for one in August so now I'm thinking maybe May 18th, as it's 4 full months.

Is that too early?


Latest activity by Ingrid, on April 15, 2021 at 8:53 PM
  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
    • Flag
    Not sure why people are sending them out so far in advance. While I agree that the mail has been questionable, sending out invites four months before an event is unnecessary. There is no way guests can accurately RSVP that early especially with the ever changing rules with Covid.
    • Reply
  • Kris
    Expert July 2021
    Kris ·
    • Flag

    I hadn't even thought about this. We are getting married July 31 so I was going to send out June 1, but you're right, maybe I should send them sometime in May, just in case.

    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
    • Flag

    The standard timeline for domestic (within the US) invites is 6-8 weeks. Overseas is 8-10 weeks. Do. Not. send them earlier than that because people lose them and forget. There is no way anyone can give an answer that early (many employers don't give out schedules before 4 weeks). If they need advance notice, send save the dates 6 months out by postcard/magnet or phone call.

    • Reply
  • Jamie
    Dedicated July 2021
    Jamie ·
    • Flag
    I actually did a test run with one of my bridesmaids who I already knew was absolutely coming because I was a little worried too. Sent her invite early to see how long it would take to get to her. It only took 2 days and all of my other guests are in the same area, so I know I can send it in the usual time frame.
    • Reply
  • Stacey
    Super May 2021
    Stacey ·
    • Flag

    As someone who just went through the painful RSVP process, I can say you will be setting yourself up for a loooong four months of agony waiting for those responses, Lol. I did mine "on time" (about 8 weeks in advance) and many people still waited right up until the RSVP date to commit. Things like sports schedules, child care, and work schedules/time off, are things that people simply will not know that far in advance, so they will sit on it, and you will agonize over it every day until your response date, haha. For whatever it's worth, we did not have any trouble with mail delays. Some guests did seem to get them earlier than others, but none got lost or were severely delayed.

    • Reply
  • Heather
    Super November 2021
    Heather ·
    • Flag

    It's okay to send it early because you just NEVER know what other people have planned. And if they do not have certain things planned that far ahead yet, they can always at least plan around your wedding if need be for other events that may pop up (birthdays, vacations, etc.). So, it goes both ways.

    • Reply
  • L
    Lady ·
    • Flag

    That's too early. If you send at 12 weeks, even you experience a small delay, it will be well within the 6-8 weeks that is typical. You're fine.

    • Reply
  • Liz
    Devoted August 2021
    Liz ·
    • Flag
    Honestly I would lose an invite sent that early. I just sent out some late STD's for immediate family and out of towners only and all local delivery was next day. 1 - 2 states over was 2nd day and my across the country people are receiving theirs today on day 3.
    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Master October 2019
    Meghan ·
    • Flag

    It's way too early to send invites. With a 9/18 wedding date, I would not send invites until the last, or second to last, week in July. That will put you at the 8-9 week mark, and the standard is 6-8 weeks.

    When you send invites too early people lose them and forget to respond. Also, I think the mail has finally caught up and is running fairly normally. I noticed a big difference after the holidays.

    • Reply
  • Catherine
    Expert March 2023
    Catherine ·
    • Flag
    I think that’s fine. People keep mentioning everyone losing them like they wouldn’t take a photo or put the wedding information in their phones lol. When my family gets a wedding invitation we put the wedding date, time and location in our calendars immediately. If everyone’s losing their invitations when they get them they need to invest in better organization systems lol. Send them when you feel is best. You might not hear from some people until right at that RSVP date you set! But at least they’ll know the date and can put in their request off from work early or put in in their phone as a reminder of when they need to request off from work. When we sent out Christmas cards in December some people didn’t get them until February. I know things are getting better now, but do what you think is best!
    • Reply
  • I
    Expert August 2021
    Ingrid ·
    • Flag
    I felt the same way and even asked in a posting on WW a while ago. The consensus was to stick with the 8 week mark. I've optd to push out one week only bc I don't think one week is going to change the responses all that much and since we postponed I want to bring the wedding back to people's minds like hey we are doing this for real this time!
    • Reply

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