Too late to cancel?

Wait your sister-in-laws? Like your FH's sisters? Or your brother's wives? Either way should definitely have been on the guest list.

And teenager or not, SILs boyfriend should have been invited by name

From how I read it she meant her sisters in-laws. As in her sisters husbands parents.. in which case totally fine not inviting them! It sounds like your FMIL is definitely overreacting. There isn't anything you can do. Guest list situations always get tricky. It definitely sucks but try to just move forward! I would have FH tell him mom she is still welcome and that you guys hope she changes her mind but definitely don't cave to her! Stay strong and enjoy YOUR wedding!

I'm a little perplexed by your guest list. You didn't invite your sister-in-laws? If the girl you're talking about is over 18, her bf should have been invited. I don't think you needed to invite his parents. That's just silly. This could largely just be the unfortunate side effect of arbitrary cutoffs for the guest list... ETA: I reread, and now I get it. In-laws of people in your life don't need an invite. They're being petty if that's why they're cancelling.

Sounds like her sisters' inlaws, as in OP's sister's mother-in-law, etc. I wouldn't have invited people in that category either.

And the teenage daughter doesn't need a date if she's under 18.

Frankly, if the FMIL is petty enough to cancel the rehearsal dinner and not show up to the wedding, she'd probably have had some sort of attention-grabbing tantrum at one or both events anyway.

I think she means her sisters' husbands' parents. Which would be similar to FSIL's BF's parents.

Sorry you're dealing with that! Hoping she calms down for you soon. Throwing a tantrum like this and threatening to not attend her own son's wedding over this is a disgrace.

Even there's any chance of getting back deposits.... cancel and elope.

Katherine, maybe reword how you put the sisters mil and fil part? And your fmil is batshit... if you are getting married this week and she wants to add to the guest list it is to late... like does she know how this works??

Uhm.....so your in laws are mad that your sister in laws boyfriends parents aren't invited? Did I get that right? or is it your sister's in laws aren't invited?

I can't get past your FMIL calling you an "ungrateful spoiled brat."

Where is your FH? How old are you?

I say keep your eyes on the prize.... your FH! Cancelling your wedding only gives FMIL the power. Let her do whatever shes going to do, but dont let it ruin your day! If she doesn't want to come, thats on her...in fact, she wont be there to stir up more drama. By not letting her behavior impact you, you're taking away her 'power'.

Are they contributing financially to any of this wedding OP?

Good riddance. A few less meals to pay for.

The in laws of my FSILs and FBILs (x2 of each) in laws were not invited and did not need to be at all! My sister in laws parents were invited but not the whole family! And no, a 17 year old isn't even guaranteed a plus one and certainly the 17 y/os boyfriend does not need to be invited by name.

OP your FMIL ridiculous outburst is insane. Seriously. If she won't come to her son's wedding because the parents of her 17 y/o daughters bf are not invited (and she just thought about inviting them a week before the event?!) then that is on her. She will regret sacrificing her attendance to her son's wedding for people she probably won't even talk to in a couple months. I am very sorry!

Im so sorry this is happening to you! What does FH say?

Skip rehearsal dinner- you don't actually need it.

As for the wedding, if she doesn't want to come- then say - sorry- you'll be missed and have your wedding without her.

You're letting her tantrum control your decisions.

Grab your fucking bridal balls- vag up- and do what you planned.

No- they aren't invited- and no matter how much kicking and screaming the on floor at the cash register- you NEVER give them the candy bar- b/c then they will forever know they can get a candy bar if they just throw themselves on the ground kicking and screaming.

Don't cancel YOUR wedding because SHE"S butt hurt about NOTHING. Literally. Call her fucking bluff.

Bridal Balls- now is the time to use them.

I think Jorocka just said it best. Do it! This is your day and no one is going to ruin it for you. Turn your phone off if you have to. BYE.

You can do this and you'll have a better day because of it. If you see her as batshit, then you arnt the only one. Think of yourself for that day!

Jorocka!! I love it !!!

@jorocka couldn't have said it any better myself !

Clarification: it's my FHs teenage Sister's boyfriend's parents who aren't invited. Her invitation was to her and her boyfriend, he did not get his own invitation. The ONLY thing the FMIL was paying for was the rehearsal dinner. This is the 7th (you read that right. SEVENTH) outburst in 6 months regarding stupid details of the wedding (we shouldn't get married on Sunday, she should be allowed to independently choose the dj, flowers, food, and decor for the day, she should be able to invite the customers who eat at the restaurant she waits tables at, I shouldn't have encouraged FH to get a second job even though I was working three jobs while also having a toddler, etc etc) each just a little worse than the last. She went off on MY MOM when my mom invited her to the bridal shower and told her how many people she could invite. I've been VERY gracious and forgiving but she crossed the line this time. FH was sitting in our new home with me when she started texting me and he stood up for me (as he is always so diligent to do) and she said even worse stuff to him. He realizes it's probably going to reach a point where he has to completely cut her out of his life but no one really wants that to happen. But I'm comforted in knowing that he would choose me over her if it came down to it.

(For the poster who asked age, we are mid twenties. I also like to add that I have a toddler because I feel like it gives me some credibility. I'm a pretty damn good person and it sucks that somebody gets to trash my character and drag me down like this.)

I second the Bridal Balls!

‘But I'm comforted in knowing that he would choose me over her if it came down to it. ‘

Er, I’d certainly hope so! You are about to be his wife! I think he probably should’ve already cut her out of his life at the point when his Mum called you an ungrateful, spoilt brat. Her cancelling the rehearsal dinner and not attending the wedding should certainly be the final nail in the coffin now.