The Piggy Bank

We certainly didnt spend that much on our wedding. But we mostly paid for it ourselves, with some help from our parents

We are paying for our wedding ourselves. We have been saving for about 18 months now and our wedding is next month. My dad did generously pay for my dress and I am so grateful! Our wedding minus the dress is coming in at about 17k. We are paying all cash.

This information is horrifically skewed by high cost places like NYC and LA. That said... we got married in NYC.

We actually spent around $30k, give or take, which is less than half of the average of NYC weddings. (Again, skewed by high cost, and the very lavish weddings of the ultra rich.)

We had a LOT of help. I'm an only child and my dad and stepmom really pitched in. We also paid for a significant portion (honestly, my father looked at me the week of the wedding and asked exactly how much I had paid out, myself, without his help, and kind of looked at me like I'd gone stark raving mad, because he knows DH and myself are broke artists). It was important to me to not have my parents foot the whole bill. I had a little bit of savings, we worked extra shifts/hours, DH and I literally used saved up coins for stamps (and still had leftover!), and so on.

We were planning to pay for it ourselved (budgeted about $6k) but halfway through planning my parents offered to pay for half and agreed that we bumped up the budget to $10k (half us, half parents). We also had some relatives that wanted to pay for cake, for flowers, etc.

We are saving and spending as we go, getting little things here and there...paying deposits and what have you. We have a budget and plan to save for every expense when it’s due.

View Quoted Comment Nice. I can remembering you mentioning that your goal was to not go into any debt. Good for you.

View Quoted Comment Nice, this is a good plan to have.

View Quoted Comment Very true! Every dollar you take, is more control one is giving. Good point.

View Quoted Comment Yes, this will be the same for my FH and I.

View Quoted Comment Okay, thanks fir sharing. I think what you're doing is more of the norm.

View Quoted Comment Wow, this is very interesting. Thanks for sharing. May I ask, which culture do you come from?

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Yes and we definitely have stuck to that! My dad and step mom are providing the favors for the big wedding (they offered) and we haven't accepted anything from his grandmother yet even though she offered.

We agreed to pay for it ourselves though without asking anyone for anything. If they offer, cool if not so be it!

View Quoted Comment Wow. That was very generous of him. I would have used the check to pay off my student loans and then towards a down paymemt on a house. Whew! If only my parents had money like that.

View Quoted Comment Oh no. Sorry to hear about the cancellation. Did you elope or do you plan on eloping or having a microwedding?

View Quoted Comment Wow, that is very generous of them!

View Quoted Comment Okay, thanks fir sharing. Yes, COVID did provide some positives.

View Quoted Comment Wow, that was very generous of them. My parents don't have money like that.

View Quoted Comment That was super generous of them. Good for you.

View Quoted Comment My background is Russian-Jewish and I live in Australia = big wedding with everyone we know invited!

In Australia it’s quite common to have wishing wells but especially in the Russian culture will guests give generous monetary gifts. Ie if FH and I attend a wedding, depending on the couple and the type of wedding, we will give as much as $150-300AUD per person attending (about $225-500USD if the two of us are going) as I am culturally used to covering the cost of our attendance.

View Quoted Comment Nice. This is not the norm for most people. We are paying it all by ourselves. Good luck on your planning.