Surprise Wedding Reception

I always thought this wounded like a fun idea. I do worry that you will upset quite a few loved ones though. Many people want to be a part of this special day, and sometimes getting married on the down low doesn't go over so well.

What if a family member can’t make it due to a prior obligation? Personally I would be a little ticked if I couldn’t make it to an engagement party and then later found out it was a wedding.

I feel like these surprise wedding ideas sound fun in theory but don't end up working out well most of the time. One thing to consider is whether you have any out of town folks who you would want there. As pp mentioned, people will be more willing to travel for a wedding reception, but not an engagement party. Also, do you want it to be a more formal reception or is it like a backyard bbq situation? Chances are, I'm wearing jeans and a tshirt to an engagement party, but I would dress much nicer for a wedding. Just some things to consider!

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Understandable, its not a wedding though, the ceremony is during the day with close family only and then then "engagement party" is wedding reception.

People are definitely going to be pissed that they missed the wedding ceremony. If you’re ok with that, then you do you... but it will probably leave a bad taste with the people you have there

I've never attended something like this, but based on posts I've read it seems the "big risk" is people who receive an engagement party invitation may not take it as seriously as they would an invitation to a wedding reception. If you're okay with people who are important to you declining because they thought, "I'm not going to take off time/travel for a party, I'll wait for the wedding," it will probably be fun. The few times I've heard of this working well, it seemed like the guest list was smaller, pretty much local, and the event was very casual. Also, I understand about the ceremony being private and that's definitely your choice, but I think that's probably more easily explained with a more traditional wedding -- when people receive the invitation 2 months in advance they know they are only being invited to the reception following a private ceremony, so they can "get used to/process" the fact that they are just invited to the party. With it all being the day of, I agree with pps that that might lead to more confusion and potentially hurt feelings. As long as you've really thought through how it will be received by the people you love, and the positives outweigh the potential negatives, have fun!

I think that it's a cute idea in theory. We had thought about doing it. But it did seem that people would be offended later so we skipped this and went the traditional route.

I guess I'd worry that the people at the "engagement" party would feel like they were important enough to invite to the engagement party but not the actual wedding, even though the wedding will have already happened at that point. I don't know. Only you know your family and friends well enough to know if this would go over well or not. Best of luck!!