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Champion July 2019

So Upset

Veronica, on July 2, 2019 at 12:12 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 45
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My fmil made our flower girl dresses for my fiance's two nieces. I wanted them to be identical and the bottom of them to be poofy. The dresses are extremely flat looking rather than poofy. They have a heart cutout in the back, but one dress looks like a heart and the other looks nothing like a heart. She also made them about 1-2 sizes too big even though she measured them because she was worried they wouldn't fit. Their mom's friend has to take them in, but it might mess up the red sash around the middle of the waist when she takes them in. My fiance refuses to consider buying other dresses because he thinks they are great. The whole thing makes me want to cry. He feels it isn't important enough to worry about but I disagree. I want dresses that don't look like they were handmade and look rather different from each other. My mom thinks they should wear them to rehearsal, but that we should get other dresses. We are spending $25,000 on a very formal wedding, but are having homemade flower girl dresses 😭 I wanted to buy nice simple white dresses from Amazon or Walmart but my fiance insisted on letting her make them because she wanted to help. She was already helping make favors so it wasn't like she wasn't included. I also invited her to go with me dress shopping but she had excuses each time. She went with us to look at venues as well.

45 Comments

Latest activity by Veronica, on July 12, 2019 at 5:51 PM
  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    I understand it’s frustrating, but I really think you should just let this go. Is it worth creating a ton of hurt feelings and drama on your wedding day over dresses these girls are going to wear for a few hours? What if this ends up being something that your FMIL never forgives you for? I’ve never paid much attention to the attire of children in weddings I’ve gone to. Kids are cute, no matter what they wear so I wouldn’t make this the hill you’re dying on, especially if your FH isn’t going to have your back on it.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    We have had so many arguments about this.
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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    That sounds really annoying and I am sorry you are dealing with it, but honestly when you are looking back on the day you really aren't going to remember things like flower girl dresses! I would just let her handle it and let it go! Not worth arguing about imo.

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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    There were certain photos I wanted with the girls but because I don't like the dresses I don't really want those photos of them anymore.
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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    That's a little sad that you wouldn't want photos to remember your nieces being part of your wedding just because you aren't a huge fan of the dresses! They're not a photo prop, they're your family Smiley sad

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  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    Are flower girl dresses really worth fighting with your FH over? Idk. I mean, in my opinion this just isn’t worth being upset over. Children’s attire at a wedding is a pretty trivial thing to potentially destroy your relationship with your FMIL over.
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  • Becca
    Super August 2019
    Becca ·
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    I agree. You want people in your photos for the memories of who was there and the ones that you love. Not because of what they are wearing. Maybe take the dresses to a seamstress and see what they can do. Especially so they dont mess up the sash
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  • Melissa
    VIP September 2019
    Melissa ·
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    I really think you should let this one go. I don’t think it’s worth arguing about children’s dresses. If they aren’t poofy enough for you, look into small petticoats for underneath. I’d rather have pictures of my nieces in any outfit at all, than no pictures because you don’t like their attire.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I will probably take photos with them in the robes I bought them rather than their dresses.
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  • Stephanie
    Devoted November 2021
    Stephanie ·
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    Maybe the dresses really aren't as bad as you think. Do you have any photos to share?

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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    Those are the back with the heart. I don't want to post the front because it shows their faces. The heart is what I have a major problem with. I have also included what the pattern looks like. I think it is important to say that when I picked the pattern I asked her numerous times if she was sure she could properly do the heart and she assured me each time it was so easy. After all the fabric was bought she then admitted she didn't know if she would be able to make the heart look good. By then it was too late because we had spent a bunch of money on fabric. She said making them would safe us money but we spent about $100 at least on fabric and I wanted to get the girls $20 dresses off Amazon, but she assumed I was going to get them from a bridal salon.

    So Upset 1

    So Upset 2

    So Upset 3

    So Upset 4
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    They already have petticoats and the mom said she will have them wear them. They aren't a poofy because my fmil didn't buy enough tulle.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I would take them to a seamstress if they lived closer to us but they live 8 hours away.
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  • C
    Devoted June 2019
    C R ·
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    Really?!??! Without any regard for how they feel? Think about it....2 little girls all excited to get dressed up in pretty dresses and getting to take pictures with the bride....and you’re going to say (or, they’re going to hear) “nope, sorry, you don’t look pretty enough in those to be in pictures with me, we’ll have to settle for those robes.” Wow. Ouch.
    I don’t say this a lot but sometimes people need to hear it.....you’re being a bridezilla. We get it - you want your wedding to be lovely. It will be. But if you start sweating the small stuff at the expense of other people’s feelings, you’re going to find yourself standing alone on a lot of issues.
    People first, people! Trust me on this one.
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  • Becca
    Super August 2019
    Becca ·
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    Well then can their mother take them to a seamstress if they really bother you?
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I am going to take photos with them, but one of the ones I really want they will be in their robe and in the inspiration photo I looked at for that photo the girls are in robes. I love those little girls so much. I just wish I got to pick what they wear rather than being forced to have my fmil make their dresses. I don't think I am wrong for wanting to pick what the girls wear and my fmil basically told me it was too bad if I didn't end up like the dresses because that's what they are wearing. I'm sorry, but it's my wedding not hers.

    So Upset 5
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    She is having her friend take them in. I don't know how well the friend sees or anything. It is also hard because I have only seen the dresses on the girls in photos rather than in person.
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  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    But it isn’t just your wedding. It’s also your FH’s wedding and it sounds like he was and is still on board with his mother making the dresses.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    That's because he wanted her to feel included, but any time my mom wants to do something to help he says no.
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  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    I think that’s a bigger problem than the flower girl dresses and would be a red flag for me.
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