Slightly irritated about thank you notes...

I never expect thank you cards anymore, since I never receive them lol

I've always gotten thank you notes from wedding gifts within a couple of weeks after the wedding, and I've always been really impressed by how quickly couples have gotten them out, which has been really nice. I'd say within one to two months is perfectly acceptable, but going on three or more months is either lazy or inconsiderate. Maybe my tune will change when it's my turn to send them out though - I tend to procrastinate like crazy.

It's probably because they're young. I never sent thank you cards for things when I was young unless it was a formal occasion and my mom told me to like my high school graduation. I would contact and acknowledge in some way usually but I didn't get really good about actual written thank you cards until a couple of years ago. Still, a wedding and it's surrounding events are things that everyone in the world knows you're supposed to send thank you cards for. I'm still surprised people don't.

Am I just old fashioned? I send them and expect to get them a reasonable time after I give a gift....Maybe not from immediate family like my mom and dad...but I guess thank you notes are becoming a thing of the past. I wouldn't have even minded a thank you email....

LOL...I'm the same way. I got flack last year for posting a thread about this. 3 of the last 4 shower/wedding gifts sent I did not get a Thank You.

1. Childhood best friend. Couldn't go to her shower. Sent her a PANINI (sp) maker! No thank you.

2. Cousin's now wife (don't like this cousin). Had a final the day after the shower. Went in (signed the card) on a gift for my mom. No thank you.

3. MOH's shower. No Thank You.

4. MOH's wedding. No thank you for the cash gift.

Huh....guess that makes 4 out of the last 5...

It's one of my biggest pet peeves! I've yet to receive a thank you for a wedding I attended last year in September. I think it's rude not to acknowledge when someone does something for you!

Wasn't it once the rule that people had a year after the wedding to send thank you cards? I know that's not etiquette anymore but I always remember hearing that growing up. Maybe people still think that applies??

Two years ago, I went to a class family friends shower and wedding. $100 item off the registry, and $400 cash. Nothing. Ever. Not even a thank you in person. I still have my kids write thank you notes though, so maybe I'm just too old school.

I plan to send thank you notes but I don't think I have ever noticed (or cared tbh) if I got one or not.

I am also 21 and I send thank you notes. I sent them for my college grad party I had a few months ago, and I will be sending them after my bridal shower and wedding. I almost always get thank you notes too after giving gifts at showers and such. I'm sure if it was left to FH he wouldn't do it/understand why it even needs to be done, but I will be doing them all.

My mom instilled the value of thank you notes in me when I was young. Maybe the consensus now is that the handwritten ones are old fashioned, but at least send an email! Or even a thank you text! Or a, "Hey, thanks for the gift" in person. I sent some baby shower gifts to a friend a while ago and I don't even know if she got them. Also I think it's out that you have a year to write thank you notes for wedding gifts - I think it should be done within the first few months.

It drives me crazy too!! I had a cousin last summer have one of those stupid poems asking for cash for the honeymoon and they have yet to send out thank you cards. Gave a gift at a shower for my other cousin back in Feb and never got a thank you from it either. My shower was after theirs and I already sent out my cards to all the family.

I don't think it's being to taught to my generation. I've always sent thank you cards, but rarely ever receive any. I'm 20 and an old soul I guess. I just always figured, if they bothered to send a gift, why can't I bother sending a card of my appreciation? It's just the right thing to do.

I can't stand when people don't send them. Most of the items I have gifted I have received TYs, but some are just so late, it's like what's the point. Last year I had a March Shower for an April wedding. She handed me both TYs when she saw me at another shower in July. Like really?? I gave you enough cash, you could have bought a stamp.

I don't know if it's an age issue I think it's just poor etiquette on their part. I sent thank you notes right after my college graduation party last year and I was 23 at that time and will do the same for everything wedding related coming up.

I usually receive them and I definitely plan to send them. However, it may take me more than 8 weeks considering we have a two week honeymoon then may be moving.

They might be backed up. I just received a thank you card for a wedding I went to in October. I went to another wedding where we got the thank you card a year later. Some people are under the misconception that you have a year to send out thank you's but that is not in line with traditional etiquette. I wouldn't be that concerned if the wedding was just two months ago. Yes it is wonderful for everyone to follow etiquette and give prompt thanks, however, it's also good to be a little forgiving. I know another bride that wanted to wait until she got the custom thank you cards with their wedding picture on the front. I won't be going that route because I think getting the thank you out swiftly is more important than having a cute custom card. I pushed myself to get my thank you's for my shower out in the week after. For gifts that have arrived before the wedding I am sending the card out the next day or so as they arrive. I am going to schedule time for myself after the honeymoon to get them done within 2-3 months (per Emily Post's guidelines). Sending thank you's is so important! It feels terrible to give a generous gift at a wedding and never be acknowledged.

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/wedding-registries-gifts-and-thank-yous/167-wedding-thank-yous

That is strange. I just wrote all of ours today. And I made sure that I sent most of the ones pre-wedding before.I expect to have them out monday (i still need stamps). Emily Post says three months, though I thought a month.

I would say the time is dependent on a few factor. Honeymoon right after, maybe if they couple has small children...but young newlyweds with no kids, no real excuse

I have a friend who took 4 months and a lot of people bitching about her behind her back (sorry, it's true) to finally send her thank yous.

But my goal is to have mine sent within a month after we get back from our honeymoon. Write them and be done and move on from wedding things.

We got one a few weeks back for a January wedding. They had wedding pictures on the outside and gave then a picture of us inside that I framed. It was about 4 months after the wedding we got it.

I want to start writing mine this weekend with a plan to send them out early June.