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ChrysieMyDear
Devoted October 2017

Sent an S.T.D, but no Invitation?!

ChrysieMyDear, on August 2, 2017 at 10:32 AM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 55

When FH and I started our guest list we quickly added people that we could instantly think of, even if we hadn't seen them in months or years. We have a venue that will hold 200, so that was our MAX cut off, well since then we, or more like I, have realized that the venue may hold "200 people" but...

When FH and I started our guest list we quickly added people that we could instantly think of, even if we hadn't seen them in months or years. We have a venue that will hold 200, so that was our MAX cut off, well since then we, or more like I, have realized that the venue may hold "200 people" but it wont be comfortable. So here is my dilemma, I have about 30 people that I could really (sorry to say) care less if they come. I invited them to be nice, but I really don't need them there (they are more like FB friends). Since we did send out our S.T.D's, and more importantly, I sent them to the 30 people I am hoping wont RSVP, would it be extremely tacky for me not to send invitations to them? I know there may/will be backlash, but at this point, I think I am ok with that because I want my family and close friends comfortable.

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55 Comments

  • ChrysieMyDear
    Devoted October 2017
    ChrysieMyDear ·
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    @Amanda - I was seriously so shocked when I heard/saw the comment. I went into a full array of emotions, which honestly ultimately lead me to where I was when posting this.. cutting everyone that isn't SUPER close to us. I don't want that day to be about hateful comments and people feeling they can judge everything little things about us.. they are already going to judge everything decor and wedding wise, but damn, if they are not there to celebrate with us and only there to criticize, do us a favor and stay home! But she is most definitely getting the invite, just to prove a point.. she'll be the first invite sent, as a matter of fact! lol

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  • Bemyguest
    Master April 2017
    Bemyguest ·
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    OP you are hella chill, and I commend you for it Smiley smile

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  • ChrysieMyDear
    Devoted October 2017
    ChrysieMyDear ·
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    @Bemyguest - THANK YOU!! Smiley smile I appreciate that, more than you know!

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  • Emily
    Expert February 2018
    Emily ·
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    I understand where you're coming from but you definitely have to invite them now. It would be super rude and tacky not to

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  • T
    Super November 2019
    Tricia ·
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    I aim to please. Lol

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  • Kelsey
    Dedicated August 2017
    Kelsey ·
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    Yes, it would be very tacky and people DO notice things like that. More than likely, the numbers will work out. All 200 people that you invited will not come to the wedding. We invited about 145 and only 116 are coming.

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  • FutureMrsPaldino
    Super October 2017
    FutureMrsPaldino ·
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    Yes! You can't send someone a save the date and not an invitation! That is so incredibly rude!

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  • Gracie Lou Freebush
    VIP October 2017
    Gracie Lou Freebush ·
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    Jeeze Louise this is one of the rudest things I've heard of

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  • FutureMrs.Cordova
    Expert October 2017
    FutureMrs.Cordova ·
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    You need to invite them if you sent them a STD. I only sent STDs to people I knew I wanted at the wedding. However, we have invited people who we did not send STDs to.

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  • Anna
    Super October 2017
    Anna ·
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    I was actually surprised at a couple people that told me they bought plane tickets after STDs went out. Some were people I was kind of expecting wouldn't come. They may already have stuff booked, you definitely need to send them an invitation.

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  • PerfectlyPolin
    VIP September 2017
    PerfectlyPolin ·
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    If you sent a save the date you need to send an invitation

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  • Jan N.
    Super November 2017
    Jan N. ·
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    Sorry...but you committed yourself to inviting everyone that you sent STD's. You will have hurt feelings, if you don't send invitations.

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  • N
    Devoted October 2017
    Nats ·
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    @Chrystal, like everyone said you need to send them invitations.

    However, for the one who made the delightful comment...perhaps you can save them the trouble and pre-fill out their RSVP card as "decline".

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  • ChrysieMyDear
    Devoted October 2017
    ChrysieMyDear ·
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    @Goldfisch - Thanks for that! They probably hadn't seen my responses to the initial comments, so it is okay. This thread has 4 pages of comments, to be honest, I usually skip to the last page too if I just jump on WW for a bit and a thread has quite a bit of responses.

    But, yes, DON'T WORRY LADIES!! I am sending invites to everyone, including the super awesome gem that called me a marshmallow.. that's for my own shits and giggles.

    Invites go out next weekend, I just panicked and let my emotions get the best of me.

    ETA: spelling

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  • Mags
    Super July 2018
    Mags ·
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    Just a lesson learn! Accomodate and move on!

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