Seeking Advice: I don't want an engagement ring, but my boyfriend insists...

Not just conflict free, but consider also a vintage ring, in the sense of recycling it's much more earth-friendly.

Also, you don't need sparkly. Get a band, like a men's band. Get a wooden one if you want a renewable resource. They're amazing. But, do take your FH's consideration into account. While I think you should have what you like, I can imagine how horrid I would feel if I wanted him to have a symbol (however traditional) of our marriage and he refused. A bit of compromise here is necessary, I think.

I agree with Jo. I hardly ever wore jewelry, but I wear my engagement ring all of the time. It's a physical symbol to me that we are in love and getting married. FH wanted to be sure to get a conflict-free ring, so he got mine on Brilliant Earth. You could also look on Etsy. FSIL got a turquoise flower ring on there that she uses as a wedding band. Just find one that you like and I'm sure you'll want to wear it.

I have a lab created diamond and I absolutely love it. It's not synthetic, because it's technically a real diamond. But it's absolutely conflict free and less expensive!

I have morganite! And it was bought from etsy! Our seller was incredible working with my FH and made it that much more special for him as well! I know all rings are made by people

Somewhere but the fact that he had such direct contact with our etsy seller made us feel like this was just for us.

My engagement ring is a ring my grandmother gave me with an emerald and a few diamonds. I didn't want my FH spending a bunch of money on something I deemed unnecessary, but he wanted that physical symbol. If I hadn't had an heirloom ring, I would have probably suggested using what would become my wedding band as the e ring as well. But as PP have mentioned, there are plenty of other sustainable stones you could go with as well. Good luck! I hope we hear what you decide

Do a no stone ring?

I am with you ladies I didn't want my FH to spend a lot on a ring because that isn't what it was about for me. The ring I picked out was a London Blue Topaz because that is my birthstone and I love them. He kept looking at it and he decided he wanted to pick my ring. He knew I wanted something not traditional so he did go with diamond but I have 2 blue diamonds and the rest are white. I love the way the different colors look.

I am with you ladies I didn't want my FH to spend a lot on a ring because that isn't what it was about for me. The ring I picked out was a London Blue Topaz because that is my birthstone and I love them. He kept looking at it and he decided he wanted to pick my ring. He knew I wanted something not traditional so he did go with diamond but I have 2 blue diamonds and the rest are white. I love the way the different colors look.

Mine is a yellow saphire and I love it!

I got a blue Sapphire it was about a grand, but they can be a lot cheaper depending how you design it. I told my FH not to pay too much either. Try to find a compromise if it means that much to him.

I have a lab grown sapphire. When FH and I first brought it up, I told him I didn't want a diamond because I feel like here are other things we could do with the money. I'm not a huge jewelry person (the occasional necklace), but I love my ring and am proud to wear it every day.

Reduce, reuse, recycle. Family heirloom ring or antique/vintage ring from an antique shop.

DH is an antique dealer. My rings are circa 1930 and my gown was circa 1940s.

Reduce, reuse, recycle. Family heirloom ring or antique/vintage ring from an antique shop.

DH is an antique dealer. My rings are circa 1930 and my gown was circa 1940s.

I was in the same boat as you, but FH told me to shut up, this is the one decision he gets to make -- to give me something that symbolizes his desire to marry me.

I'm glad he did, really. I love my engagement ring. It's possible you can try to push him towards non-traditional rings, but I'd let him have this one. The ring and his picking it means something to him as well.

I hate rings. I have only owned a few in my life and almost never wear them. Like you I didn't like the idea of an engagement ring, and I once thought that if I my boyfriend proposed that I would wear the ring on a chain around my neck instead of on my finger. (that's an option for you as well)

But once I got the ring, even though it wasn't my ideal style of ring, I loved it, and I loved what it represented, so I wore it on my finger as is the norm. If your boyfriend wants to go with the tradition of proposing and getting you a ring, then go with it. Try it out, wear the ring. You may find your opinion changes once it happens to you.

I no longer wear my engagement ring now that I'm married but I do wear my wedding ring all the time and I find I like rings a bit more now.

What if you found bands that stack nicely and you could get one for an engagement ring then one for a wedding band?

If he wants to buy you an E Ring I would accept it graciously. This is a first world problem lol.

I don't know if these are your style, but I want one so bad.

https://www.mysecretwood.com/collections

I don't have an engagement ring because I am not into jewelry so it would have been a waste of our money. FH at first felt like he should get me one anyways just because of pressure from other people, but I REALLY did not want one! He finally came to terms with it and actually ended up feeling relieved.

There is no rule or law that says either of you have to exchange rings or any kind of engagement gift at all. However, if he really wants to give you an engagement gift then it should be something you both agree with. Try to pick something you actually want, whatever it might be.

I would just see if your engagement ring could do double duty as your wedding band. My engagement ring is beautiful and while it does have 3 small diamonds, they've been passed down through the family (I'm third generation wearing them now). I have no interest in an additional new ring so I'm just using the e-ring in the ceremony as my wedding ring.