Second Reception

I think it's totally fine! We did a second bigger but cheaper per head reception because we didnt have the budget to pay for 300 guests to attend a wedding at a resort.

It's ur day (or days) u can do what u want!

I think it's weird. Either invite someone to the wedding or don't - or find a way to fit them into your venue/budget. A second reception seems gift grabby, and a reception is to "recieve" your guests and thank them for attending your wedding.

I think it's totally fine too! In fact, we are having a second reception as well this summer. My future in laws are hosting it in their backyard. Mainly for FH's family, as most of them won't be able to make it to the wedding, since it will be in my home state.

We will probably say no gifts needed its not for us to get more gifts it just that my moms side is very close and large but if we were to invite everyone that my parents want then my FH would have no one that would be from his side. So its mainly for my parents and the few friends that cannot make it to the wedding day.

I wouldn't think of it as gift grabby at all, but as a guest I would feel completely beyond B-listed. Like, a whole new day kind of B-list.

We are TOTALLY doing this too. Our 1st reception will be earlier in the day (12 - 5 pm) as we're having a morning ceremony and our 2nd reception will be later that evening (9 pm - 1 pm) for those we could not invite to our smaller ceremony. This second reception will be a great time to really let our hair down. There will be a band, DJ, food, drinks cake and a photobooth; no gifts required. We honestly just wanna have fun and use this as a opportunity to thank all of our friends for being apart of our lives.

@Kate- try not to be so black and white. Free food and drinks for your friends never goes out of style. I'm almost sure the second reception will be a bigger hit than the 1st.

I don't understand why people get so sensitive about this stuff. Especially recent brides who know the expense and how hard it is to please everyone. Kyla, I think you should do what fits YOU and your FH best as well as your bank account. If that means having a ceremony and intimate reception, followed by a big celebration on a different day... DO IT. I would never feel b-listed to someone who chooses to put family first. I would be honored that you want me to take part in any celebration. I think you should totally go for it!

I do know how hard it is to please everyone but I also knew how to choose a venue that met my needs within my budget. I have a huge family too - they were all invited and everyone was treated the same. No b listing, no tiered receptions. It wasn't hard to figure out - not everyone can be invited and not everyone who wanted to come could come. And it was all lovely.

I agree with whoever said that it's a step beyond b listing (sorry I'm on mobile). The OP is going to do whatever she wants and that's fine, I was just giving my opinion like she had asked.

I definitely did two receptions, one is cultural reserved for family and elders and family friends and the second is what the FH and I envisioned which is a geeky cocktail reception. Due to a cultural tradition, we have to get married on a day projected as auspicious even though it falls on Sunday. I have traditional parents who seem to want everything so it was a way to give them partially what they want for one day and get it out of their system so they would respect what the FH and I really want the week after on a Saturday.

2nd receptions are usually in other states/countries for that family that couldn't make it. An expensive real reception for guests, and then a cheaper version for "extras" uh no. That is bizarre and tasteless

My in-laws are on a different continent, so we'll be having a second small reception for them, but I would feel weird doing a second one just for those you couldn't afford or make space for in the same basic geographic area.

I don't get why, one does not just combine their costs for the two receptions, find a bigger venue, and have one big reception somewhere in the middle of the budget, that can accommodate all?

But...to each their own!

(unless in the case of a destination or out of area 2nd reception)

Not a fan of this idea. Are the people invited to the second reception invited to the wedding? If so, and they can't go to the first, are you sure they'll come back for the second (and understand). And if they're not, they might feel slighted that they weren't good enough to invite to the first.

If you have enough money for two receptions, I would recommend getting a bigger place for the first one. As for the people who can't make it... are you sure they won't travel?

I think its different though when its a DW. My cousin had a teeny DW (our family is huge, fiances family is tiny...they don't want him to feel like a guest at his own wedding) and then having a BBQ to celebrate their marriage with friends and family. We were on the "BBQ List" but didn't feel B-listed at all because the only people at the actual wedding were the highest of the high VIPs (parents, siblings and officiant).

I don't really care for this idea, either. Maybe just host a house party or something for those people later in the year, but don't call it a wedding celebration or reception. It's one thing if you are having a DW or something, but to have a second reception because your venue isn't big enough for all of the peope you want to invite? Nope.

Not a fan of this idea. I like Laura's suggestion of just hosting a house party or something.

It depends on how close you are with those you can't invite - I gotta admit it does seem a little weird, but I was just in a wedding that did this. There was a quick reception for everyone at the church where my friend got married....then those of us who were invited went to the "actual" reception which could only fit 1/2 of everyone who went to the wedding.

If your having a destination wedding and the ppl you invited couldn't make it, then you should have a second reception when you return. But for only those ppl who couldn't make the destination haven't a second reception due to space issues may look like your saying that they weren't good enough to make the cut for the real wedding.