I got married at 22. We had a small budget by typical wedding standards, but we went as traditional as wecould. Big white dress, church wedding (against my wishes), 160 guests, reception with sit down dinner, crazy detailed cake. We had to have it all. I agonized (Not as painful as it sounds. I'm a planner.) over everything from the perfect hairstyle to what color nail polish to a perfect seating chart where Uncle A didn't sit anywhere near Cousin B. I tended to be worried about what other people expected...being traditional (which I am not) and having the picture perfect wedding.
This time around, I am 39 currently. We're not getting married until 2021, so I'll be 41. We're planning a 1920s theme wedding in a reception hall with the reception in the same place. We're figuring out how to fit a handfasting into a 1920s wedding because we're Pagan and that's how we want to do this. We're having a small guest list of less than 50 people. If we have a cake, it'll likely be from a grocery store. I don't currently see flowers being anywhere near our wedding. I won't be spending $800 on a dress, which I know is nothing for a lot of brides, but was huge for my parents and I when I got married the first time. My dress isn't going to be a traditional wedding dress. I doubt we'll even have a loose seating chart and will trust our guests to sit where they feel comfortable.
I read some of the forums and giggle at people who are doing the same things I did the first time. I'm not at all judging them. I think it's endearing. It's just no longer me.
How have your views and choices changed from your first wedding to this one?
