Second (or more) - Time Brides...what's changed?

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Isn't it the sweeter the second time around? Rob and i only dated for 6 months back then, but we broke up on great terms..I was only 15 and he was barely 20 and leaving for the navy. It was brief but we never forgot each other. Flash to 2014 and we become friends on Facebook, then in April 2017 he called as said he was taking me to dinner and not taking no for an answer LOL I know I could have said no but so glad I didn't. We've been together since, and engaged just 7 months later. Neither of us thought we'd get married again...never to old for love

First time 23 and pregnant court house wedding.
Second time 38 not pregnant 150 people renting a hall budget of 5k looking like 10k ( all his fault ) lol

View Quoted Comment Haha. I already halved the budget Adam wanted because I know how he is. Lol

First time I was 18 and have absolutely no clue what I was getting myself into. It was adorned with Costco flowers, DIY living room altar, JP, a donated dress, sparkling cider, and the finest Sunday best the men could find in their closets. I was late to my own wedding by about ten minutes. I though (on my way down the stairs) "I don't want to do this", and did it anyway, out of rebellion. It was planned in less that 3 weeks, and cost ~550$. We had dated 11 months and 9 long years later, we divorced due to the strain of my career in the Military.

Now, I have dated the love of my life for 4 amazing years this month. A simply affair is what we are striving for. Nothing too fancy in Vegas, and NOT cheesy. My dress was picked out by me thankfully. My adoptive mom/dad up in the heavens/real dad living can breathe a sigh of relief.

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Awe!!! Sounds wonderful!

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Sounds nice!

First marriage I was 24 & we got married at the courthouse with nothing other than a bouquet & boutonniere made at the local Kroger. We never got gifts, nothing. That marriage lasted 20 years. This time...my husband (we actually got married in February, wedding is July 6th) & I wanted the pictures, the ceremony, the cake, and to celebrate with family. His first marriage lasted 22 years. It was a disaster of a wedding. I chuckle at the stories. Our venue is less than a mile from our house. Its at the community center in our town. Very pretty set up. My friend from TN is making us a beautiful wedding cake, I have my dress, I ordered my bouquet & my husbands boutonniere. I made boutonnieres for my sons and my step dad & my cousin who is officiating the wedding. I have cut corners a lot. I just want beautiful memories with the most loving, patient, kind man I could ever have met. And...pictures to set around the house of our special day! I cannot believe it is 3 weeks away! Good luck to you & your wedding!

Oh boy, so much haha.

This is both of our second marriages and pretty much everything "traditional" went out the window. My first marriage, I was 19, now I am 39. His first marriage, he was 25 and is now 51.

No seating charts, no bridal party, no bouquet toss, no garter toss, no dances, no toasts, no speeches, no one walking me down the aisle, comfort food buffet, no wedding cake (having donuts). I am having a wedding dress but only because the dress I originally ordered came in 2 feet too long and was going to cost too much to have hemmed so I got a dress at David's Bridal for $99. We are writing our own vows and have already written the ceremony for the officiant to perform.

First time around I had to have all the bells and whistles, all the way down to custom chocolates and those little heart shape bells to ring for the newly weds to kiss. Ceremony was at a church, the cocktail hour had to be in a separate area then where the reception would be held. I had to have extravagance. My save the dates and invitations were hundreds of dollars this time, total I will spend less then 200 on both including postage. This time around I am 10 years older, it is a second marriage for both of us and we are having everything at one location, and saving as much money as possible. instead of renting linens I like for an insane amount of money, I was able to find them on amazon for 1/3rd the cost it was to rent them. The dollar store is my friend lol and not to many flowers this time. I love the greenery idea, and may even do the foam flowers for most of the décor. The only real flowers are the bridal party and even those will be minimal. This time I feel it is a true celebration of us coming together, and we know what we want and we are celebrating with friends and family and its not about how much we spent to make it look amazing and appease everyones ideas. The little details are not a huge thing for me and I think I have learned that nothing is a crisis and everything works itself out.

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I look forward to seeing pictures!

I'm getting married for a second time, to my ex husband. First time we were young and rushed into marriage. We divorced after 7 years of marriage and 2 kids later. But after being separated for 13 years we got back together and are stronger than before.

Our first wedding was bland. No set color scheme, my dress was a simple white church dress (nothing to it), my aunt sewed a tiny bit of lace onto it. My veil was borrowed. My MOH wore a pick blouse with a matching pink skirt with flowers on it, my bridesmaids wore ivory colored shirts with long blue skirts. Best dressed with the flower girls. Ceremony was in my grandparents backyard and our reception was in the same location, which was nice because it save a lot of money. Only decorations was we borrowed a relatives arch. an aunt of mine made the cake, a friend made the bouquets.

This time, I am wanting another outdoor wedding but not in my grandparents backyard. I am looking at venues and looking at wedding dresses. I want my dress beautiful but something that I can wear again, but not just for a wedding (if that makes sense). We have a theme and colors this time around.

We have different views and options and choices compared to the first time around.

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Agreed. We are spending minimal money. We just want to have a great time!

First time 25: Courthouse. There was only like 5 or 6 of us and we went to Dave and Buster's afterward. No honeymoon.

This time: I'll be 30 and then a month later I'll be 31. We will have a wedding party and we are having about 60 guests or so. We've chosen our venue already and have all the vendors lined up with them except photo/video which we already chosen from an outside source. We do plan on having a honeymoon but we're just not sure yet. We have a few places in mind so we'll see what happens when we get to that point.

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That's a fabulous story! Good luck to you!

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Hope it's wonderful!

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It was very nice and nice of my ex-in laws to finance it. The person I was marrying was not the person for me unfortunately! Thanks

View Quoted Comment How interesting! My college love (1st “almost married him”) had some similarities to yours. Nothing “wrong” per se. He was very conservative (I was not), very into what his family expected of him & his marriage, I sometimes felt controlled by his expectations of what a relationship should be.. We broke up before he officially proposed. Years after we broke up he called & apologized for not taking our relationship seriously or understanding how to truly support a partner in marriage. I was also career driven & he felt threatened by that. He wanted to get back together but because I knew he would still want kids (I didn’t) that even though he’d try to be open minded I think he still wanted a “traditional” marriage.

I really found my voice once I hit 40. Found a match who is just as crazy creative & entrepreneurial as I am. Even though we may lead a conservative life (minus religious stuff) we totally get each other’s different sides. Both of us are also willing to work on good communication. Plus, we like each other as friends.

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Thank you!

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Adam is a much better match for me too.

Not a second time bride but i liked your post. i feel like that's such a good way to see it - a lot of people for their wedding tend to think certain things matter so much like seat covers and centerpieces and it's like looking back those things probably didn't. i tell my friends now when they get married, try to keep theirs simple because i realize for me now during my planning process that i definitely could have used simplification and that i think about all these things that in the end, probably won't even matter!