Second marriage feelings, future name change effects

I'm so incredibly conflicted. I was married in 2010, and unfortunately divorced 5 years later. I stayed 3 years too long going to therapy together trying to save something that wasn't able to be saved. I had my daughter in this marriage. She's an only child, and just turned 8 this fall. I never wanted to have her come from a divorced home. I did and the effects stay with you, especially with parents that end up hating each other. She and I are very close obviously but even more so then our bond, while married to her dad we were together often without him for various reasons. He's a decent father and loves her but has issues that can cause selfish behaviors. She often is disappointed in the end, but loves her dad. We both try (sometimes it's difficult) to have a good relationship between each other to make sure she gets the best of her parents. I wasn't serious about anyone for a couple years. Then I met my fiancé. Our kids met eventually, and we decided to work towards creating a blended family. The kids seemed and still are seeming to adjust well to their respective family adjustments and now over the last year to being all together.


I never knew that I'd feel this way but I've had my own adjustment issues emotionally going from being just my daughter and myself, to family life. Nothing bad, just missing the times where it was just my daughter and I, and I didn't have to spread my attention from her. Being just us, we didn't have to compromise or adjust. It is something she's never mentioned being bothered by and I sense the adjustment even though she's taking it well. We all want this family and to be together, but it's not easy to change family structures in divorce.
That being said, when we get married, I do not want to keep my ex husband's last name. I kept it because of my daughter all these years but have never wanted to. Now, I'd very much like to take my new husband's name. Problem is my daughter will be the only one in the house with a different name. She's recently asked if my name changes when I marry my fiancé. He and I are kinda traditional about that. I told her yes, and explained that ususally that's what happens. More so, I don't want to keep my exs name but didn't say that to her. She was not thrilled and said she wants to be the same as me and have the same name still. I do feel terrible about this, and don't want her to feel alienated. We already had a huge but good shift in our lives, and with that shift comes change.a
I feel all the change is at her expense so that I can be happy. I divorced her dad to be more happy, not her choice. I moved us to a new town to be close to work, again benefiting me but also for financial reasons to keep us afloat. Then I met a man and fell in love, but again, asking my daughter (and his kids) to adjust to this new family life. I am extremely happy, but always feel I'm taking from my daughter's comfort zones. It's making me feel like a terrible mom. And now, I'm also taking the family name away.
Thank you for reading and I will just take it one step at a time I guess.