rsvp Dissapointment

Our wedding isn't until next year. We just sent save the dates since most of our family is out of state. We are so worried about this! When we sat down with our venue coordinators they said it is super common that people don't RSVP. I think that is so rude and inconsiderate. There is a lot of planning and costs that are based around the guest count. We are wanting to do an RSVP through wedding wire and an actaul RSVP card to send back and see if that will help. I hope everything works out for you! Sorry that your friends and family aren't being very considerate. Do you have a bridal party or anyone helping that you can put in charge of nagging people to RSVP ASAP??

Please try enjoy those that do show up. Don't
allow the ones that will not be there to over
shadow your day. Congratulations! On your special day.

I would feel a bit disappointed as well, but I would still be so happy with who actually did end up coming. It's a blessing that there will be at least some people who turn out for our special day. Try to not let it get to you

Ive had some people not rsvp so i called or went to see them in person to remind them about it and got a verbal yes so thats a plus way to think of things ...call and talk in person might get a better responce good luck ...plus youll have people that will show up that still dont rsvp so id add at least say a 5-10 place hold in case but you will get people that have other plans it happens unfortunately

We invited around 200. I planned for around 2/3 of them showing. That's around 140 people. Only got 106 RSVP's for yes. I get it. Sorry you have to go through this!

I get this feeling. We invited 172, and had 118 RSVP "yes" and attend. It was a big surprise to have so many declines, but we were glad in the end! In fact, we wish we would have had an even smaller wedding!

I’m experiencing the same thing currently! We invited 167 people and at the moment only have 70 confirmed and 8 declines means over 100 other people still have responded with only a week left to go until I asked for all RSVPs to be in.

I totally get this because that's how I feel about ours. We assumed a bunch of people would bring plus ones which we included in the count, and also invited a lot of out of town people that can't make it. I was disappointed. But I am over it and just finished our seating plan. Hoping that nobody no shows on the wedding day!

Sorry that you are sad. Be positive about your day and remember you will get some rspv late. Remember that you are going to have a beautiful wedding with those that can come. It will be okay. Be encourage that everything will be fine.

I’ll sorry, love, that’s actually one of my biggest fears doing this. Already don’t like attention so if I ever feel like I have to beg for it I would not like it. However I’m sure they care, your day will be beautiful no matter what ❤️

I am so sorry you are going through this and can completely relate. I never thought getting rsvp’s back would be so challenging and people you thought would be coming aren’t. I try and think that a)I’m saving money not having to feed them and b) if they didn’t want to come, I shouldn’t want them there. It hurts but everything happens for a reason. Enjoy your big day!!!

I'm so sorry! We invited 225 and had 125 RSVP yes. We anticipated between 150-175, so this was a little less than we anticipated. It ended up being a positive, we had a full open bar instead of just beer & wine and got more desserts! It was more than enough people. I was in a wedding in 2017 with 70 guests, it seemed like a great number!

We sent save the dates out 10 months in advance, invites 3 months in advance. Guests had 6 weeks to RSVP either online or with the addressed & stamped paper in the invite. We still had to contact 61 people after our deadline passed!

We had a similar situation. When we went through our guest list, we considered each person and thought "there's no way they'd miss it". When a lot of our close friends replied no for various reasons, some legitimate, some not so much, we felt pretty hurt and let down because we knew there would be no way we'd miss their wedding for the world (a wedding invite is a big deal and honor in my opinion). After a few weeks, we felt a little better about it, and realized we would be saving a good chunk of money (I'm so sorry that may not be the case for you), and also would be able to spend more individual time with those who would actually be there. Less people could mean less stress in the end. Just trying to shake it off and move on to focusing on the more important things - enjoying OUR day and being married!

PS - Is it possible to add in more extras to your catering such as some extra fancy appetizers or something like that so that you're actually getting your money's worth?

We invited 200 and have 112 coming.
Focus on the ones that are there dont get caught up on numbers. It's not worth it to stress over something you cant control your day will still be perfect as long as your husband is there you are all set!

This is what I'm worried about. I have 109 guests, just sent the invitations out today, and after I did the math of people that I knew wouldn't be coming due to being out of state I'm left with 86 people left that are in the area and could possibly make it. My biggest fear is not many coming and then those that do come not having a good time and wanting to leave. It scares and worries me to no end.

Try not to be too disappointed, this is completely normal. A lot less people RSVP'd than I thought as well. Sometimes they don't have the time, or they just can't make it and that's fine. I'm writing down who said no, so I can make sure not to go to their wedding. I'm kidding, I'm kidding. lol.

Talking about disappointment though, I was just told our officiant who is supposedly our 'friend' asked "is it cool if we just skip the reception?" Like ... ok. That hurts! lol

Same! I sent out 80 invites and have only got about 40 (maybe) back! Now trying to track down the remainder of guests!

I am a little disappointed in a couple of friends and family not going but I understand the dilemma they are faced with as we are having a destination wedding. But I know when you have high hopes and get let down it hurts. I am not letting it hurt me in anyway I am going to still have fun with all those that are coming. We I voted 60 and about 30 are coming.

Don’t think poorly of me, but I selfishly hope I end up in your situation. I wanted a smaller wedding, no more than 80 people, but I’d have been happy with immediate family and close friends which would have still put us at around 60. Instead we ended up inviting 220 people, which has made me a bundle of stress because I’d booked the majority of our vendors based on an estimated 100 guests. Yikes! RSVPs have been trickling in slowly (sounds like the new norm) but we’ll probably end up with somewhere between 130-150 guests — not my dream, but we’ll be happy to host just the same! Honestly, I think that’s all any of us can do in this situation. Sorry so many of your friends and family have disappointed you in not coming, but those who do come are sure to make you both feel loved and celebrated, so just enjoy!

p.s. Love Carly’s suggestion about modifying catering — treat yo self!!

Our rsvps are due today, all they had to do was check attending or regret all postage was paid and slip in back into their mail box. I have a similar situation our wedding is in 31 days with final numbers being due in two weeks! We invited 160 thinking we would get around 100-125 attending. Our number today is 73. I gave my mom a list of relatives that havent responded for her to call and confirm! Im over this wedding planning business!