Requirements of Being a Bridesmaid: the unabridged rule book

Can we make this a sticky post? Require everyone to read it before they can post? Something?

Thank you for this!

YES THANK YOU

#glittercoveredweddingslaves

Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes bump bump F***KING BUMP!!!!!!

YESS! I would also add that the said article of clothing should be "within your budget as discussed privately with bride"

Yes.

Thank you!!!!!

Where I am from, this is not the norm. I didn't "demand" my bridesmaids to do anything and I've also been in two weddings where this was not the case. Some people do things different. I had a shower, a bachelorette, they bought the $220 dress we all selected, they asked me about what shoes and jewelry to wear. And even though I didn't ask for any help, they offered and were very supportive. I, as a bridesmaid, did the same. I get that people don't agree but what's the big deal, really? You can't tell people how to feel if you don't understand. And you can't tell people what their loved ones should be doing. Just saying

OP is referring strictly to the "requirements". Anything above those requirements is a great addition, but bridesmaids don't have to do them.

I've been a BM multiple times. Each time I offered to help and did what I could to make the bride's day happen. I didn't have to.

Omg GryffinBride, Amazing. Will need to save that one.

YES!!!!!!

And my BMs are helping with what things they can. (One is planning a shower, etc.) But I don't expect them to and didn't choose them based on how much they could help with the wedding.

@MrsS, it sounds like you had a caring group of awesome bridesmaids and that's great! It's very common for your bridesmaids to help with planning and arranging a shower and bachelorette party, but what we're saying is that is shouldn't be a requirement. Being a BM/MOH can be very straining, both financially and in terms of time, so it's important to not expect anything more than the basic requirements of the "job".

Edit: words.

@MrsS: You offered. Meaning it wasn't a requirement. It doesn't change the fact that a bride EXPECTING her bridal party to do anything more than be there in the right clothing is just a shitty way to behave.

If they offer, great. If they don't, you don't make demands.

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BUMP

I've never done anything but this for a wedding. Anything beyond was because I offered. I really don't get the expectation that bridesmaids are glitter covered slaves. If you need help planning hire a wedding planner.

I have a MOH and just 1 BM. Both are my sisters and I honestly couldn't imagine treating them like slaves haha my FW and I had already planned on paying for everyone's attire. (Since it's a small bridal party) Until I started reading the forums on here I never knew that brides treated their friends and family anyway other than like friends and family ha

I'm sorry, I hear what you guys are saying. And your right, your bridesmaids aren't employees but when I accepted being in a wedding, I def expected more than buying a dress and showing up on the big day.

If it were only that easy, lol no one here would be saying how stressful it is

Lol you just answered a question I JUST ASKED! Thanks