rehearsal dinner just wedding party?

Personally I am just inviting the wedding party and like the grandparents. But I wouldn't let the dates come! They are getting their dinner and having their fun the next night lol

If they are coming from out of town or are married I would let them come

If they're married, def invite the spouse... whether or not they accept is another thing. as for those who aren't married, it's really up to you. we invited the dates so the dates weren't alone/bored for the hours of the dinner. and again, they may or may not accept. another major reason we invited the non-married couples was because they were OOTs.

I agree. The rehearsal is for the wedding party. We are only inviting those who are standing up, plus both sets of parents. Altho we are doing things a bit different. We will be doing a pot luck/BBQ in our backyard. So I suppose anyone who wanted to bring a dish would be welcome.

My hesitation with that is i think that it is an all or nothing deal. I would find it rude to tell my girlfriend in town that she can't bring her date because she lives there and she's not married. But tell another girl who isnt married that because they came from out of town she can bring hers. We are taking them to a nice Caribbean restaurant that we love. If i was doing something like at someones house or a bbq i would totally let them but we are talking another 20 people out to dinner and drinks.

It may vary be area and circle of friends..but I always thought it the norm to invite to the RD the bridal party members' dates..the way I see it, it's a thank you to them, as you said. so their close significant others should also be included, it's a nice gesture..however given your large party I think it would be okay to make an exception..thats a looot of people if you invited all significant others.

We are only inviting married spouses with our wedding party, no dates. Also, agreed with the other ladies, we are only inviting the wedding party. Who's paying for the rehersal? My MIL and FIL are paying for it and MIL is bringing a "date" (they are divorcced. MIL is bringing her sister). Its whatever you can fit in the budget and what you think is right.

Personally I think you should invite the date. Two years ago FS brother was getting married, I wasn't in the wedding party but the rest of his family was. I was the only one not invited to the rehearsal dinner and I was definitely hurt. I also feel that if say one of your BM is coming from OOT it wouldn't be fair to ask her date to stay in the hotel while she is out. I agree with Danielle it's an all or nothing.

I agree with Gwiley, when my FH's brother was getting married I was invited to the rehearsal dinner but I wasn't in the wedding. If I would not have been invited I would have been so hurt that I may not have gone to the wedding, however I am with you, I have a large wedding party as well, but it is out of town. I am going to invite the wedding party, their dates & our parents to eat with us (which will be the majority of our wedding guests since its a DW).

I've dated two guys that were in weddings while we dated and I was invited to both of the rehearsal dinners. I declined one because I hadn't been dating the guy long enough in my opinion but I did attend the other one because I was also friends with the couple and we had been dating for three years at that point. I agree that it should be all or nothing though, either everyone may bring their spouse/significant other (no escorts, tramps, one night stands or flings!) or no one can.

You need to invite the SOs of your wedding party to the rehearsal dinner. I know that it sucks because that means more expense but they do need to be invited. I personally would hate it to go to an OOT wedding with my DS and be told that he wasn't invited to the RD.

I also think that you should invite the significant others. To me, it seems rude to not invite them. Married couples are invited, but unmarried people who have been together for 5 years are not invited? That gets very sticky, and there is a huge potential for hurt feelings and, to be honest, members of the bridal party who won't come because they can't bring their SO.

I'm not having a rehearsal dinner, I'm only having a ceremony rehearsal with the BP only and our parents, then we will either go out to eat together (just them) or head back to the hotel where we'll order pizza and play games for the rest of the night.

This is absolutely up to you, if you can afford to pay then invite all dates/spouses etc... but if you can't don't stress it. My FH was in a wedding back in december, they had a rehearsal dinner although I was invited, I didn't go because I didn't see the point, that was his friend and I barely knew them. And same thing happen with me in my friend's wedding.

I have a small wedding party, so it will be the wedding party and their spouse/bf or gf, out of town guests and parents. It will be about 30-35 max.

Patricia- i like your idea about just doing the ceremony rehearsal and those who want to go eat from the WP (just them) can join us, those who want to go back to their rooms can. Like i said we are having a cocktail party later that same evening with food for everyone.

Thanks for posting this Danielle. I was too having this dilema. We are having an OOT wedding which is 3 hours away. I have decided to invite the WP and their dates as well. So Mcdonalds it is! J/K

I think you def need to invite SO's. As you said, it is a thank you. Being in a wedding is a costly venture for both bridesmaids and groomsmen. In addition to the attire, there is the cost of showers, bachelor and bachelorette parties, etc. It would be kind of insulting if my FH were in a wedding, paying for things required for a groomsmen(tux, bachelor party)out of our budget, and I wasn't invited to a dinner. On the day of your wedding, you are not treating your wedding party, or their SO's to a dinner and cocktails, they are doing you an honor by standing up for you.

I thought it was customary to invite the dates? I've only been in 1 wedding, my BF, and I wasn't dating at the time, so I didn't have a 1 to the wedding or rehearsal dinner. But others who were in the wedding party, and were dating/married, did.

I'm not inviting spouses. The don't need to rehearse anything...

In my experience (and I have been to A LOT of weddings) it's usually family and those in the wedding party with dates that travel. I have been to rehearsals where I was the close friend who traveled, but not many. Always been invited when it's a family member, even a cousin. But my family is small and we don't live anywhere near each other. Personally, I would be offended if I came from out of town and my date wasn't invited and I was.

From your last post I would say you are safe to just have a really small dinner to truly thank those in the wedding party. Because it sounds like the cocktail party afterwards is geared for the masses. If you ONLY have the WP then don't worry about it. I am pretty sure you will get opinions, but brush them off, you aren't doing anything that's supposedly 'improper' or 'rude' if there aren't any exceptions.