Recovering alcoholic groomsmen dilemma

What's the other part of their gift? Maybe you can just leave it out or exchange it for something else. It would be more insensitive if you gave him the gift. It's nice that you are thinking of him.

Also about the bachelor party, our BM has a problem with alcohol. He has tried to quit but it never lasts. He will always be around alcohol, there is nothing you can do to prevent that.

Why isn't your FH dealing with the groomsman gifts? Don't you have enough on your plate already?

You can't worry about this groomsman at the bachelor party... you don't have any control over the situation, and it's his choice and responsibility to learn how to handle times when others are drinking.

As far as the boot-glass... talk to your FH about it and get his opinion. He's the one that's been super-close friends with this guy for years and years. If it's not a good choice, then luckily there are lots of good GM gifts out there!

Bachelor party: Incorporate non drinking activities in earlier in the day and if the bar scene is too much for him, he can take off at that point, but doesn't have to miss the whole event. Other activities include golf, paintball,steak house dinner ( drinking yes, but eating too!)

Great idea, Sami! It's tough when the whole activity is centered around drinking.

I'm giving FH ideas for GM gifts. Poor man did even know he had to give gifts.

My opinion, I would switch the gifts out for everyone. I mean you can drink soda out of a beer mug but it could be awkward for him because the connotation is definitely there. I would not give him something different from everyone else that will just make him feel weird too. You are still far enough out that you can select something else very easily.

Regarding the bachelor party, I don't think your FH should change it to a non-alcohol party if that's the type of party he wants. I think it is up to the groomsman to make the decision for himself, and opt out if he feels that he cannot handle being around the booze. Maybe your FH can let him know that yes, there will be alcohol there but he understands completely if he chooses not to attend so he doesn't feel obligated? 90 days is pretty early in the recovery game, he might not be up to that type of situation yet.

@ Lablake- We'd be paying for them to all play paintball. They are all young and active so it would go over great!

@Jessica-FH is TERRIBLE at stuff like this lol. He asked me to look around for gifts. I think I'll just have to search for something to give to this one groomsmen..just dont know what :/ lol.

As far as the bachelor party, you ladies are surely right! I'm sure he will expect there will be tons of drinking there and if he feels like that is something that he cannot handle at the time, then he should excuse him self for that one celebration IMO.

@ Sami-Maybe I can talk to the bestman about all going to out to dinner first so the groomsmen can still be involved in that part.

I agree, there should just be different gifts for everyone. as for the party, have FH talk to his friend to see how he feels about being around alcohol, then decide from there..if he figures there is a non alcohol bachelor party just because if him, he could feel pretty awkward.

Thanks Ab Z.