Reception on different day than wedding?

Can I ask you what did you decided to do going forward with you're wedding ?

Destination

I am doing exactly this! I am getting married, having a sort of intimate luncheon with all who are attending the wedding (about 45 people) on the day of the wedding. Then we are having a honeymoon for a week, and then we are having the reception with a more traditional cake and dancing with something like 50-60 guests. The reason? The wedding is taking place in our home town, which is about 2000 miles away from where we currently live. Had we gotten married at home, the 45 or so close friends and family ALL would have had to travel to us. We figured it was easier on our elderly relatives if we came to them instead. The reception, on the other hand, is for all of our local friends and coworkers who want to help us celebrate, but are unable to make such a long trip. And this is the crowd who is more likely to enjoy the stand-up cocktail reception with dancing and such. We are not doing it to rank our guests or to say some people are invited to one and not the other; honestly, anyone who wanted to come to everything is welcome to. Rather, we are doing this to make the lives of our guests easier so they don't have to travel. And I disagree with the person who said that this isn't a "reception" if it is not on the day of the wedding! This will be the first time we are RECEIVING guests as a married couple, so it abso-stinkin-lutely IS a reception!

I'm tentatively planning to do this as well, because my SO's family and my own all live 3-12 time zones away from where we are based, AND I hope to get married within a month or two after competing my dissertation for graduate school, which I'm currently doing ... In another country. I can't manage planning a full wedding and reception with all the pressure and expectations while focusing on school. My SO and I both have exceptionally laid back families, but his is HUGE and pretty much ask based in one state. So even immediate family members would have a really hard time coming to us in the city we are both (normally) based in. So doing a family only wedding would allow his whole family to attend with way less stress, allow us to plan a wedding and backyard BBQ reception with far less external pressure, and then later have a bigger, fancier party for all our friends, who are almost all far closer to the coast we live on. To the wedding, I'm not inviting even close friends, as painful as that is, because I don't want people getting hurt and feeling stratified. But the party I hope to make way more fun and worthwhile for all our sweet friends who hopefully will feel more cared for bc theyll be attending something that wasn't planned with 25% of my brain.

So I say, there are totally valid reasons for it, and more power to you. Just based on the initial responses I've gotten playing with the idea with close friends, it's really important to just think through how people will take it, and whether that's worth the saved energy or money or time... And strike the right balance that rings most true to your values. If that's been thought through considerately and communicated well... They'll understand, I'm finding!

I love this idea, That's what I'm doing

I'm considering something similar. My fiance would like a very intimate ceremony but is okay with the bigger party. I'm thinking we will get married earlier in a courthouse wedding with just our parents, and then have a party (reception style) potentially months later. We might need to be married soon for health insurance reasons anyway.

I recognize that some people may be offended, but this is our compromise. It may be this or nothing, which people would also be upset about. I hope people will understand that it was just our parents and not take offense. We are asking for no presents, we just want to celebrate with friends and family. I was thinking the invite would clearly state "We got married! Come celebrate with us" to make it clear they won't see vows. I guess if people are so offended that they were one of the 96 people who didn't make the cut for the ceremony because they did not create us from their DNA, then they can make the decision not to come. I wouldn't be offended, but it appears I may be in the minority.

You do what’s best for you! It’s not abt anyone else.