Received Wedding Invitation As "& Guest"

I definitely would be offended. I think it's rude. DH and I received an invitation to his friends wedding and it said and guest and we both were offended. There were a few SO of friends that we never met coming to our wedding and I went out of my way to find out their name and made sure I addressed everything with their names. I could understand writing and guest if someone was single and was allowed to bring a plus one but not when the person has been with someone for years like your situation.

This happened to us last summer & it was a mutual friend! FH has known the groom all his life but I've been working with the groom for 8 years & speak to him daily. He still addressed it to FH and guest. I thought it was odd because we were engaged & him and I speak daily but I found out they sent it to everyone like that. It's just bad etiquette, I wouldn't take it personally.

At least yours included "& Guest." I just got an invite from my cousin over the weekend addressed only to me...

I wanted to reply to this thread yesterday! I think you should be somewhat offended.

Same thing happened to me. FH's cousin also sent her wedding invite as "& guest". FH and I live together. Also, she knows me well: we're having a joint wedding shower, went wedding gown shopping together, and she used to pester me every day with wedding questions. I do have to admit she's clueless about a lot of things (wedding and non-wedding) so it wasn't a surprise.

I've worked really hard to make sure I have everyone's names right for invitations (even for people FH and I haven't met for whatever reason), so I'd be a little pissed at their laziness. Like a few others have said, Facebook. It's not hard. But not worth making a fuss about.

Meh, I think it's a little weird to get an invite that way from someone who clearly knows your name, but it's not a big deal. At least you're both invited. I have to admit, I didn't look up everyone's significant other's names for invites, although I did include them on escort cards. A lot of my friends either aren't on FB or use non-legal names (nicknames, first and middle without last name, etc.), so I would have had to email everyone individually (and I don't have all their emails). I got my invitations less than a week before we sent them out, while I was working 2 jobs, so I just didn't have the time to go chasing everyone. If I knew the name, I put it down, if I didn't, I wrote either their first name (if I knew that), or and guest.

I wouldn't be that offended. I just received an invite in the mail addressed to myself & guest and they used my married name. Haha! I know she will have meant nothing by it. Just likely wrote it out quickly (I know we were B list. I am totally cool with that as she is a newer friend and I know she was VERY limited in friends she could invite) and she has only met FH once so likely was a little unsure on how to spell his name (He does have a weird name).

I wouldn't be offended. I have bigger fish to fry.

Not a big deal. People are busy and things get sent. I don't really see an issue. You aren't married yet it's easier to send like that than his name and your name. If after your married it wasn't mr and mrs, but mr and guest, then I could see you having an issue.

You'll have to let it go, because there are bigger and worse things to be worried about, but I would be offended too. Even if you don't see them, they should have taken the time to find out what your name was instead of being lazy.

Honestly, I gave a couple "and guest" invitations out because what if they want to bring someone else? I am asking them to drive 2/3 hours to my wedding, what if their SO has to work or just doesn't want to attend? I would like them to bring a friend or sibling with them if they so choose.

People have so many things on their minds surrounding planning a wedding; just come being your nameless self and enjoy the wedding. Or address it like this, “one f-er or two f-ers.”

It depends. How close is this cousin? Is it possible that you rarely communicate and they are inviting you out of obligation only and therefore they don’t realize you are in a relationship? In that situation, let it roll off your back. If you are super close spending a lot of time together and they intentionally didn’t include your name, that is considered rude.


Some of the previous comments seem to assume that all cousins everywhere are super close. Which many are not. You can know of relatives and have never been introduced to them. For example, being close to an uncle and aunt who live cross country but never had an opportunity to meet their kids. That could easily be a scenario happening here.