Price per head

If I had to guess I would say mine was close to 100 per head. (If of course I get the venue I am looking at.) I am only having 80 guests. Hopefully under though. I wanted to try and keep the budget at 6k but that will NEVER happen. But who knows!

What did you include in your calculations to determine that 100/head ?

I would include food, bar, cake, linen/table/chair rentals, and centerpieces. Oh, and stationary. Pretty much anything that costs more with the addition of each person. Things like the photobooth and DJ cost the same whether you have 20 guests or 200, so I would not include those.

But I also wanted to point out, that at least in fmaily/group of friends, when someone covers their "plate", it is understood to be just that - the meal itself. I don't think most guest factor in the rest unless they are actively planning their own wedding and hyper-aware of the associated expenses.

People perceive this rule differently. I always thought it included food, alcohol, cake and maybe even a rental fee. So I would give about 100. A friend of mine considered that rule to literally just mean your plate of food. She had never planned a wedding. So she assumed $30 is plenty since you typically never spend more than 30 for food at a restaurant. The rule isn't really clear to a lot of people.

How many people actually do this?

I suppose I would divide what I would need per person and then for the entire group like the DJ, venue..

Also, after reading Stephani's post, I realize that 99% of weddings my family and friends go to have cash bars, so perhaps that is why people only include the meal, because they are paying for their own alcohol anyway?

According to a recent article (I believe it was in the NY Times) not many people consider the price of dinner to be a guide for their gift. It's not really a rule.....

One thing I have to stress though is to include gratuity and tax into your calculations. Your venue may give you a deal of $100 per person, which includes the food and alcohol plus cake, linens, servingware, etc. but when you add 18% gratuity and tax which in NY is 8.25%, it ends up being more like $127 a person.

At our wedding, we ended up getting monetary gifts that reflected the financial situation of our guest rather than anyone trying to cover their plate. Some guests were very generous and gave us close to $200. Others gave us $50. Times are tough and if you're thinking about essentially getting your money back on each guest, it's just not going to happen. We got a decent amount of money back in the end, but it was barely a dent compared to how much we spent on the wedding. Sad but true.

My caterer for the DW beach reception gave me this number. At the end of my contract had the total cost and then divided by my 50 head count.

I actually never considered this before and was just thinking "Oh, it's X for a meal plus tax/grat per head" when I did my initial budgets.

This did make me realize that for brides who's parents (or in my case, grandparents) add to the guest list and pay for their extra guest wants, they should pay more then just "18.95/person".

Also, I don't expect any gifts at the DW. Was surprised when mom asked where we have guests put gifts. My response "Why would they bring gifts?"

Future Mrs. Covington, alot of people do actually. I guess it's kind of a tradition to give a gift that is equal in value to what the couple is paying to host you, whether in the form of cash/check or a boxed gift.

In determining price per head, I'm only including those things that would change, dependent on number of guests. So food, alcohol, linens for tables, centerpieces, etc. For example, my dress isn't included in that because that cost wouldn't change if I had 20 guests or 200. Obviously, I'm not going to be telling anyone what mine is either, it's just more for my own curiosity.

When I go to a wedding I always try to "cover my plate" in form of a gift, but I guess I'm really "covering my head" since I always think more than just the meal itself. I guess if you have an all inclusive (or mostly all inclusive venue) they say its xx/per person and it usually includes the venue, food, and drinks/bar, and the linens and such. Since our venue didn't include ANYTHING it's harder to actually determine what would be included in "per head" although the venue does go up in price in 25 people increments (even though we dont "get" anything additional from them if we have more people - not even more chairs!) Although, this doesn't really matter at all, since no one will be told, it was more just curiosity. After planning my own wedding I am way more aware of everything that goes into planning it but still think my estimated "gift" amount that I usually give (which varies depending on how close I am to the person) is a good amount.

My price pp is 44 to 45 depending on what dish they choose..So that includes (for my venue) 4 hours open bar; middle tier, the entre with bread, salad, soft drinks, I also added apps in there (cheese and crackers and fresh veggies)..I skimped a bit on those since they add up, and we will be having our guests wait 30-45 minute stops at cocktail hour..

I am only including food and booze in that since they are the truly necessary components..I figure any decorations, any extras like photobooth or uplighting that's really the choice of the bride and groom and they don't have to choose elaborate centerpieces and things like that..so anything else I consider separate budgetary choices that are not determined by my presence at a wedding, nor my guests' presence. IMO same goes for cake..I chose 62 dollar-cost of cupcakes and small cake from a reputable baker in my area, not a 400 doillar cake.

Allisauraus I think that a lot may be stretching it. As a pp I would say that people tend to give what they can afford. I know when my moh got married some guests gave her 25, some gave 100 and others simply bought her an item off her registry. Also this may be a regional thing. Celia mentioned it's not a rule so I'm sure people do what they can. If you are a guest at a wedding how do you know how much your "plate" was? Are you asking or guessing?

Shana - I definitely wasn't trying to imply covering the cost of my wedding by receiving gifts. Like I said a few times, it was just a curiosity question. Our wedding is fully paid for all ready, except for the things we dont have to pay until it gets closer and the money for those things is already in an account collecting interest until they are due.

Also I wouldn't include linens unless the venue does not provide them for free, like you said, that makes it harder since your venue didn't include those things..however, I would still maybe not include that since the bride and groom could have chosen a venue that did include those things..or like they could use free ones instead of renting or buying fancier ones.

Kathleen B - I agree, I wouldn't include the price of my dress or tux, or rings, or HM, or any of the "other stuff" in my price per head either.. If i did, my price per head would definitely double or triple lol

It's just interesting to see/hear, b/c I've had a few other people say "my wedding cost was $15K" but what do you include in that price? I mean everything for our wedding TOTAL is a lot more then what is needed just to host the ceremony and reception.

I totally agree - People will give what they feel is appropriate and what they can afford. I don't EXPECT anything specific from my guests other than for them to have an awesome time and enjoy the night

Nisey, I completely understand. I have actually never heard of the concept of covering your meal or head at a wedding with your gift. I give what I feel is appropriate and what I can financially afford. Especially now that DH and I come as a couple now, I couldn't imagine giving more that $200 as a wedding gift for most weddings I'd be invited to, but in the case of my wedding that wouldn't cover both of us.

But I am very serious about factoring gratuity and taxes! We were pretty taken aback by that last bill, because we forgot to add it in!

Future Mrs. C - Guess. I think most people have a "go to" amount that is kind of an average for their area or circle. Yeah, I definitely think that most people just give what they can afford. I think the "cover your plate" thing tends to be more prominent in some circles than in others.