Pre Wedding Depression

All last week (leading up to a weekend filled with diy hotel bags, framing photos and signage), I was crying all the time (no period, not preggers). I cried when I couldn't login at the gym, I cried when I stubbed my toe, cut my water bottle labels too short, and the best was when the thai delivery guy delivered the wrong soup to me. that was it- I started HYSTERICALLY sobbing in the kitchen and my FH just hugged me. I'm feeling much better this week though after I got some of those things off my to-do list b/c I knew they were just going to be a time suck. and they did take all weekend.

I hear you, it will get better. I would make time for yourself and try and give yourself a break (which is hard, I know), but you'll pull through. xo

I have depression and to be quite honest I have had a hard time myself lately with planning. A lot has to with because I'm coming to the realization of change. It also doesn't help that my dad passed away a year and a half ago and he doesn't get to do all the dad stuff with me (walk down the aisle, father/daughter dance, etc.). What I will be doing tomorrow (and every time I get in a slump) is take a day away from all the plans and focus on myself. Don't forget to care for yourself. Write, relax, take a spa day, and ignore your phone. Do whatever makes you happy and forget everything else. Just for a day. You'll be glad you did.

I've been having some of it the last few weeks. It has nothing to do with the wedding but more because I'm never alone. I dont have any time for me. We have 4 kids in summer break right now. I haven't got my hair done in two months, haven't had my nails done in weeks. Because I have no one to watch them. I love my kids. I really do. But I'm so depressed with never getting time to myself. I love being a mom, love having time with them, but they cant even go outside because of all the smoke from the fires in CA. They have been locked up inside for a month. It's getting hectic. I told fh this morning I feel like such a horrible person feeling like this, my life is great, it's a dream come true. I just want some alone time. Please dont bash on me i feel bad enough.

You are not alone! Yes, weddings are wonderful, but they are also incredibly stressful. There is nothing wrong with what you are feeling and it is absolutely okay to ask for help and support if you need it.

View Quoted Comment

Bash you? I want to hug you because I think every mom goes through this and we just don't talk enough about it. Being a mom to littles is HARD. Yes, kids are great and you have some fantastic moments that make it all worth it, but that day to day will bring you down after a while. You are in CA, so school should be starting soon, right? Mine started yesterday, today and the last one next week.

I will tell you, it does get easier. Our kids are at a much more manageable age now (11-25). People are always talking about how hard it is to let your kids go. Not us. We hope to teach them to fly. 2 are grown and on their own, 4 more to go!

Hang in there, mama. The days are long but the years are short!

View Quoted Comment Thank you so much. I needed that. We are actually in nv but getting all the smoke and it's horrible. Our kids start in exactly 3 weeks. We are starting the latest out of all the districts. Me and fh are so opposite on this because he works 12 hours and he feels like a bad parent because he isnt home. And I feel like a bad parent because I just want alone time. I'm pretty sure after school starts it's going to be different and I'm going to miss them and be so bored. My future fil called today and offered to do a all kid sleepover Monday night to give me a break and take them all day Tuesday so I will get some time

View Quoted Comment We live in the Central Valley and the smoke has been awful for weeks now
How nice of your FFIL! Enjoy your alone time. You DO deserve it!

We live near reno and its absolutely horrible. My mom is sick because of the smoke. Shes on an inhaler and has been told not to go to work by her dr. Its so bad here.

View Quoted Comment Sorry meant to quote you lol. See above lol

It's horrible you ladies are having pre wedding depression, but I am so glad go see I'm not the only one crying all the time. Every step of planning my wedding has been awful. I actually just posted about getting advice for addressing my future mother in law and that's only part of the issues.
My parents, sister and I moved from New York to Ohio 20 years ago. About 7 years ago our family back in New York had disagreements with my parents. In the past 5 years they have all worked on it and even had a family reunion. I never had hopes of my family coming to anything in Ohio. But the way they all acted on Facebook when I got engaged had me excited. I sent out invites and save the dates and my RSVPs are coming back. We have got about 40 back and 3 of which are from my side and 1 of the 3 was a no thanks...
It just hits hard when you see how many can't even send back the pre addressed pre stamped RSVP.

You aren't alone. Almost right around the time I got engaged I had to go on FMLA at work for severe anxiety and depression following a health condition. I am prone to these things, and the weird thing is is that I honestly can't wait to marry my best friend and start our lives together but in a sense it is SUCH a huge change, we will be moving to our first place together within weeks after the wedding, and as an only child I was coddled so letting go of that super tight family relationship with my parents is hard. We will always be close but it's like everything is changing, super fast. I have turned to wine too much to help me cope and it hasn't helped with anything, almost every conversation is about the wedding, it has blown up to way more people than we thought would come, and again I am so excited but all of the details and emails and schedules etc. drive me nuts, it takes everything not to over-stress or cry or freak out when it's brought up. Wedding planning is not easy. When you're young you dream of it and how amazing it will be, and yes some parts are amazing, but overall it just is a LOT to deal with. Sometimes I wish we just eloped in some tropical getaway but at the same time I can't wait for this big party/reunion of sorts of people who are going out of their way to be there for us. You have to keep in mind at the end of the day that you'll be married to your best friend, your lover, your soulmate. That's whats getting me thru. Almost there. The stress will pass, things will happen how they will, don't overthink it. Best of luck!