Potluck day after picnic...tacky?

.

That would be tacky. Since you can't invite everyone to the official wedding events, just don't have something like this. It's fine to have a non-wedding-related get together, but I wouldn't create another event for the people who you weren't able to properly host.

No.

Reposted my meme came out tiny lol

If you have to ask, it probably is.

I'm with Emmy.

And seriously? You can shut down several businesses just by inviting people to the wedding? You know they have the option of saying no right?

Let's go with invite your friends, an pot luck second reception is tacky and rude. And would probably STILL shut down all those restaurants since apparently you believe inviting is the same as people coming. Or the food poisoning would keep people from going back to work.

Search this topic.

ETA: It wouldn't shut down several businesses. Most owners have employees to cover for them so that they do not have to be there literally 24/7. A good friend of mine owns a restaurant and literally lives in the an add on, on the back of it, yet he still has a manager and employees to cover for him when he wants an occasional night off. They would have enough advance to make arrangements.

Nope...nope....nope

Gifts are never a requirement so "helping them out" by letting them bring a dish instead of a gift is just wrong. Host your guests on Sunday the same way you will be hosting your other guests on Saturday (which is hopefully with dinner and drinks). ESPECIALLY since this second event seems gift grabby all on its own.

NOPE - you can invite them, they might not be able to attend. If you can't invite them for your own reasons, than you can not have them at any wedding related events.

Have a house party if you want later - non wedding themed to catch up.

NOPE - you can invite them, they might not be able to attend. If you can't invite them for your own reasons, than you can not have them at any wedding related events.

Have a house party if you want later - non wedding themed to catch up.

I like how you decided for your guests that they couldn't come because it would "shut down several establishments"

This is where adults make their own decisions

Or maybe it's because it saved you money?

Also...You can't invite everyone because it would shut down establishments...ya, that is totally why

Tacky

I'm with wine-o. They're adults that can decide on their own if they want to shut downtgeir businesses for a day. Unless you are on their board of directors, you can't tell them what to do.

PS, your idea is horribly tacky.

No.

Why would inviting people who own or work in the restaurant industry pose this unusual problem? Why would their attendance at your Friday wedding shut down businesses? If these people are restaurant owners, they should have employed people who can handle the restaurant for one evening (even if it is a Friday). You say you didn't invite these people because attending your wedding would shut down their businesses, but I have to ask, has it occurred to you to allow these individuals to either accept or decline a conventional wedding invitation? If not, why? You're making a lot of very personal assumptions about these individuals, and if I, as an individual involved in the restaurant industry, discovered that I was invited to your post wedding pot luck because you thought I was struggling, I'd be highly offended. I know lots of business owners -- some in the restaurant industry -- and their businesses don't rise and fall on a single day of business. In fact, good owners hire good managers.

You should have invited these individuals to your actual wedding via conventional invitations. If you had, they would have had weeks to work out a schedule that would have left the restaurant functioning for one night. If they were facing something huge and unusual -- as in, the restaurant was rented out by a large group for the evening -- they may have had to decline. However, I could have never jumped to the conclusion you did.

If you insist on doing a day after picnic, then please, don't ask people who are already "struggling" to host a party in which you and your husband will be the guests of honor. Actually, it is rude to mention anything in "lieu of a gift". Just have your wedding, invite those you want to have in attendance, and let them adult. You have no right to assume that they are struggling, etc.

Taking bets...will this thread disappear? If so, when? I give it about ten more minutes (unless the OP doesn't check back for a while).

Oh, and ladies, you all rock. Such great advice from so many diverse personalities. I'd be honored to attend any of your properly hosted weddings.

Aside from the obvious potluck issues - why would people even give you gifts when they aren't invited to the wedding? They are invited to a second-tier picnic the day after. It is amazing that you think gifts are required in the fist place, never mind the tacky idea of "allowing them" to supply food at this picnic in lieu of gifts.

God no