Poll: How many mom's are offended by kid free weddings?

I honestly don't understand why parents would want to bring their kids at a wedding (maybe if they can't find someone to watch them I guess). A reception includes alcohol and although I don't have any kids, I know I wouldn't bring them. If the kids are a little older, that's fine but I never understood why some parents want to bring preschoolers and toddlers to a wedding reception.

I'm having a kid free and my kids and his kids are older. However im also having a destination wedding on a beach. I don't think its rude for kids to not be at the reception. .alcohol will be involved anyway. .so yes enjoy the evening off

Most weddings in my circles have been adult only. So this issue with people wanting to bring children is weird to me. I'm offering a babysitter for nieces and nephews as a convenience not out of obligation.

Definitely not rude, a formal event for the most part is not always the best place for children. FH and I are having an adult only event and we noted it on our wedding website.

Yes, the idea of going to a wedding for children is exciting and they more than likely look forward to going, but in reality when they do go most will get restless because it's a long day and unless you have a separate area for children entertainment, etc, they will start going off the walls as per Snarky's example.

Also, ensure when you address your STDs/Invites that you specify who is being invited, for example., " John Smith, and Jane Smith", don't address the invite to, for example, "The Smith Family".

I'm having a kid free wedding. The youngest person invited is my 13 year old son who is a groomsman (he'll be 14 then). The next youngest person will be 22 at that point. I do not think it's rude at all.

Because FH would have about 20 kids in the family under 12 (mostly under 6), we are excluding all under 12. If we included them that would be 20 chairs taken away (see discussions about the 2 year old not having their own seat), meaning 20 fewer adult guests we could invite. Also, I just don't want a screaming baby in my ceremony (even for 60 seconds as the mom rushes out). I am making this known on my "Guest Information" section of my invites and my wedding website. I think you are doing the appropriate thing by having your girls and nieces & nephew in the ceremony, but not the reception.

I'm a mother of 2 and I wouldn't get offended at all. Its nice to have breaks with my husband without the kids. Weddings are fun and even more fun without kids.

I do not have children, but I wanted to share something one of my FH's friends said to me when I mentioned that we may not be inviting kids - and please note, he's a father of 3.

"If it weren't inappropriate, I would kiss you on the mouth right now."

So I think he's ok with it

I'm a mother and I would not be offended at all. I will be having a semi kid free wedding, just my 9 year old and FH's 6 year old niece. Both are very well behaved.

I think Kayla said it best. I have an almost 3 year old and I wouldn't be offended, but in all honesty I likely wouldn't go unless the person being married was very special to me. My son can be a pain and he is rambunctious, but if anyone besides me said that, or implied that he would ruin everyone else's night, I'd be PISSED.

I'm not offended by it but I have a hard time finding a babysitter we have nobody zero help so I would have to miss the event just for that reason

I have a 5-year old and I generally would not be offended. When my older brother got married in 2014 they requested no kids mainly for space reasons, because their venue was very small. The only exception was for my daughter and my SIL's niece because of their role in the wedding. The only people who complained were my aunt & uncle who had recently moved away and wanted to bring their two kids. They ended up not coming anyways, and that was that. It's really all up to you and most people will understand.

I want a kid-free ceremony (nothing ruins the moment like a toddler tantrum in the middle of the vows) and my fiance wants kids at the wedding. We compromised, and are spending a few hundred to set up a kid-friendly area with babysitters during the ceremony.

I'm inviting kids bc well we have children lol. The wedding I was just in I don't know if it was kid free or not but I wasn't bringing them. I wanted to enjoy having a night off - but I wouldn't write enjoy having a night off lol. Most of my guests with younger kids have already informed me that they will not be bringing their kids.

I am currently dealing with this! We are having a kid free wedding with the exception of our nieces and nephews and our own children. That being said, the wedding is on NYE, is black tie, and isn’t until 7 pm. The invitations were addressed to only those invited, there is a note on the website and there isn’t an option to include anyone other than those invited on the RSVP or on the website RSVP. I can see both sides, but would you automatically think your children were invited to a black tie Christmas party that is late in the evening, or would you automatically think, I need a sitter. I know I would definitely not assume that my kids were invited. So, what’s the difference if it’s a wedding?

For me its not about being "offended" as much as its about being "conflicted". There's a difference. The guest list is at the discretion of the host, so the bride and groom have a right to set the parameters there. In full disclosure, I do tend to vere toward the idea that a wedding isn't just a party, but the joining of families, so its gracious gesture to invite children, particularly if they are family of either bride or groom. I say that knowing others disagree, and respect those differences of opinion. Even so, I would certainly honor the hosts requests, but the practical reality is that an adult only wedding might mean that I can't go depending on how far away it is, and what the needs of my children are at that time. If I have a good baby sitter, a close friend would work for a local event, and ideally grandparents for a weekend event, then age depending, I can probably make it happen. If its out of town and the grandparents are going to be at the wedding too, then I'm lacking in responsible childcare and probably will have to RSVP with regrets. Since I love you dearly, and want to be there on your day, those regrets are sincere. If you aren't a parent yet, you might not understand why leaving them behind might not be responsible parenting, but in some cases, its not best. Again, this isn't "offense" but "conflict". I want to be there, but your parameters mean maybe I can't and now I'm all emotional!

In response to the write up you have above, I do, however, agree with a number of posts here that it reads rather presumptuous that parents would have more fun without their kids, or want a break. Depending on circumstances, if I've left them out of town for the weekend, or even locally with a babysitter I don't know well (if I brought them with me out of town, but not to the wedding), then I honestly might not be having as awesome a time as you'd think, because I'm concerned about how things are going with the sitter. Instead, I'm just trying to honor your wishes for a perfect day. If you have to write something, try to avoid that presumption in the language. And lets just be real: The decision is primarily about your desires anyway, so why pretend its about me having fun?

If I could offer some advice for anyone thinking in this direction, just be realistic about your guest list. If you have friends and family coming from out of town, particularly if they need to fly and stay in a hotel, then realistically consider extending the invitation to their children as well. And if its immediate family traveling to be with you, brother or sister of bride or groom, then all the more so, please consider their whole family. If people love you enough to put that much effort, time and money in being present, its a gracious gesture to make it as accommodating as possible for them. That's good hosting, and we seem to have lost that perspective in today's wedding culture.

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Sounds like your aunt and uncle were in the wrong to bring kids to a no kids wedding. But it sounds incredibly rude to assume everyone with kids can figure it out and find child care. everyone parents different and everyone situations are different. If you have a no kids wedding you need to first be sure you are ok with anyone who has kids not attending.

I'm a mom and I'm having a kid-free wedding.

I'm not offended at all. To be honest, depending on the couple/party, I might not take my children anyway.

All of my bridesmaids, who are also moms, are so excited to have a night away from their children so they can truly party how they want.

*I don't think its rude. Moms are full people outside of being moms and with the right amount of notice, this isn't any different from any other event that isn't child-friendly*

It really depends. Something that does offend people is when the couple says "adult only..you must arrange your own childcare" (which is communicated by word of mouth or the website and doesn't go on the invite) and there are flowergirls and ringbearers in attendance. Even if they are at the ceremony only, it isn't an adult only wedding anymore. Someone being upset by that is valid.


One of my best friends is a single mom to a 6 yr old and she is her world. However she would have no issues arranging a babysitter if it was truly 'adult only'. She is also the type to walk out if there is a flower/ring child at an adult only event when it was explicitly detailed otherwise. I have a few cousins though who are moms of under 18s and they would be highly offended because weddings in their social circles are open to all ages and everyone is well behaved for the most part.

It’s your day do what you want this goes for anything that people are pushing you to do. If it is what you want and are comfortable with do it. I completely understand the whole kid free wedding thing people are drunk and kids aren’t being watched, they are messy and loud and a lot to handle lol. Even though we are allowing children at our I completely understand the not wanting to.