Phone-free wedding?

Nope you have every right! My mom has been making a big deal about my phone free ceremony but I don’t care. Even if I have to personally take phones away, I will! I’m paying all this money and if you can’t be out of your phone for 20 minutes then I don’t want that person there..

It is NOT AT ALL overstepping if it's important to you. I would make sure people know what is coming though (put it on the invitations and your website and remind those who might forget), and have a very straight forward system for how it will look (a specific time the officiant tells people to turn off their phones or if you want to take them away, where people can leave and gather their phones after the event without a hassle).

Keep in mind that some people need phones because they have a babysitter or some other reason, so not everyone might be willing to completely give them up. But I don't think this is an unreasonable requests at all!

I think it’s reasonable to ask for no devices at all during the ceremony, and to say no photos at the reception. But I don’t think you can tell people no devices at ALL during the reception, people may need to check their phones for one reason or another (work, babysitter, a sick relative, etc...)

I think it depends on the size of your wedding. It sounds completely fair to me, though.

Totally fine to tell people to keep their devices in their purse or pocket during the ceremony. I don’t think it’s fair to tell people they can’t have their phone during cocktail hour or reception.

You can have a phone free Vermont but reception I don't know how you could control. You would probably have to call each guest and request pictures aren't on social media.

I didn’t say anything and only a few people had their phones out during the reception and only one during the ceremony. But I was grateful for the photos they sent me while I was waiting for the ones from my photographer, and I’ve heard horror stories about photographers having issues and the photos are gone. It might be rare but it was enough to scare me into just not saying anything about ppl taking a few pics here and there. But do I think people over share on social media? Absolutely.

A private party in a venue you rent or lease, it has long been proper etiquette for hosts who wish to restrict phone calls ( except emergency) and taking of pictureses, to do so. Way back in real film pictures days, it was considered the hosts right to privacy to control both calls and pictures, made known as people enter the event ( or earlier, with general information given out by the couple. And it is generally considered impolite to ignore a live conversation or party and occupy yourself with other things, whether reading a book, writing a letter, playing a game, or posting online. So if you want no pictures taken, phone cameras or regular cameras, and for people to not use phones, then let people know you want your privacy. Only people at the park, whom you have invited, have any right to see what is going on there. Evict anyone who takes issue with that. Your private party, your rules. Outside a church, in a parking lot, public places, people can film what the general public can see. It is not a popular stance, but there is a long history of people keeping private parties private, so don't feel intimidated if people object. Let them know in advance. And ask them to leave the moment you see a phone or camera come out, if they do not immediately turn it off and put it away. And as with liquor, it is not wise to let people go out of the party, do their thing ( flask or social media) and come back. You leave, say goodbye.

Daughter and SIL felt VERY strongly about this after guests standing up to take photos ruined the professional photographer's shots of the bride and her dad coming down the aisle at a friend's wedding. So, to convey their wish for an "unplugged ceremony," they had a sign, the officiant asked guests to put their phones away before the procession began, the groomsmen/ushers reminded people as they were seated. In addition, we spread the word in the weeks before the wedding, especially with some extended family members who are notorious for being obnoxious with their phones/cameras. We got some pushback, but I just said, "this is what the B&G want, and we expect people who love them to honor their wishes." It's been over a year, and as far as we know, not one guest took a single picture during the ceremony. (They didn't care about guests taking pics during the reception.) Good luck!

To be honest I was kind of grateful for the images and video people sent me because it was at other angles that my photography and videography team didn't get. But I completely understand your mindset because when I walked down the aisle omg there were so many phones pointed at me it was a bit overwhelming

A sign and spreading the word sounds reasonable. But sorry not sorry, nobody will ever physically take my phone away lol. For whatever reason I’m just not worried about this like others are.

For the ceremony portion, definitely. But I think it would be overboard to try to dictate guests using their phones during cocktail/reception!

View Quoted Comment You may give your phone up voluntarily. But no, people cannot require you surrender it for a period of time. Not legally. They can require that you put it out of sight and not use it until you leave, except to silently receive texts, so you can leave and go to a central area, for emergency phone call use only. The alternative: leave. That much is legal, banning the calls and camera, NOT taking the phone.

I made this for my wedding. My reasoning is that I want my guests to be present and enjoy the ceremony. I’m not interested in a bunch of photos on facebook before I can share what I want. Stick to your guns. It’s your day!

View Quoted Comment I like this sign. We may have to steal this.

I think asking people not to take pictures during the ceremony is fine. But asking people to not have their phones the entire wedding is a little odd, or take pictures of themselves at your wedding.

It's fine to request phones are put away, but don't expect everyone to follow your wishes. We did the phone free ceremony request and our officiant even stated our wishes but so many people video'd and took pics, it's like they didn't even care and what was I to do about it? In the end I wound up with some pretty cool pics that my guests had taken. You can request but you can't tell anyone not have their phones on them. I have children I need my phone to be with me all the time & I will check it randomly.

View Quoted Comment

No problem! I found it on Etsy and just made my own.

I don't think it's a lot to ask at all. My venue came with a photographer-and will actually charge the bride and groom 100$ for every single time they see a camera/phone/whatev out and ready to take pictures (of anything). I made SURE to put on my info card that there are no pictures allowed in the ceremony or on the site where it is held AT ALL. No exceptions! Thankfully that is only for the ceremony. Hopefully they get the message. Good luck!

An unplugged ceremony is fair, and it’s very common these days - but I think it is a huge ask to ask your guests not to use their phones during the reception. I love taking pictures with friends, and photog will not be able to capture all of these. Some of my favorite pictures are ones taken on the dance floor. Plus as PPs have mentioned, people may check in with kids, dogs, etc.


Perhaps you can ask guests not to post photos with you in them? Is that a happy medium?